Would you stop menstruating if you could?

In March and April, 2000, several articles and comments appeared (including in the New Yorker magazine - read that whole article for free - The Lancet medical journal, and the Guardian newspaper, and in many places since then) about the benefits of stopping menstruation. The inspiration is mainly the book Is Menstruation Obsolete? (read some excerpts), by Dr. Elsimar Coutinho and Dr. Sheldon Segal, (Oxford University Press, 1999), which argues that the benefits far outweigh any problems. But the work of Beverly Strassmann, of the University of Michigan [U.S.A.], who has studied the menstrual customs of the Dogon people of Africa for years - they use menstrual huts - also supports the argument for fewer periods.
In August 2000 a company announced that it was trying to get approval for Seasonale, birth-control pills packaged to take for 90 days at a time, so a woman would menstruate only once every three months.
And in March, 2001, a play in New York City, Even the Queen, treats this theme (see the MUM news for 11 March 2001).
What do YOU think? Would you stop menstruating indefinitely - for years - if you could start up again easily if you wanted a child? Put your comments with the ones below. No need to add your name or address, but writing your age might give a hint of generational differences, and it would be informative to give your nationality or part of the country. (Some writers, below, have allowed their names, etc., to be included.)

Don't worry if your English is not perfect; I sometimes correct grammar and spelling, but I don't change the meaning of your comments.

Below are your e-mail comments (December 2000 - February 2001). (I count 45 on this page) Add your comments!

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Leer la versión en español de los siguientes temas: Anticoncepción y religión, Breve reseña - Olor - Religión y menstruación - Seguridad de productos para la menstruación.

Comic strip: A conservative American family visits the (future) Museum of Menstruation

CONTRIBUTE to Humor, Words and expressions about menstruation and Would you stop menstruating if you could?
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A writer from the University of California at Berkeley writes that fictional medicine preceded the real thing:

Connie Willis wrote a science fiction short story, "Even the Queen," in which doctors invent a medicine to stop menstruation. Almost everyone in the story loves it. [A play, in late March, 2001, in New York, is based on this. Read the news from 4 March on this site.}]

February 2001

"I hate my period":

I am a 20-year-old female living in North America.

I WOULD GIVE UP HAVING MY PERIOD IN A HEARTBEAT.

I began my period at the age of 12, and the first time actually wasn't so bad: very little cramping, light flow, and short duration (only 3 days!). I felt so grown-up; after all, I was a "woman" now. But each progressive "monthly" (ha ha) flow got worse and worse. I had cramping so bad that I honestly could not uncurl myself from a fetal position on my bed (even after taking way too much Advil). I became cranky and bloated and my breasts were usually sore for two weeks, and I NEVER knew when I was going to start flowing (much to my utter mortification). But the worst part was that the duration got longer and longer: first I had my period for 9 days, then for 14, and finally (at its worst) I had my period for 28 days with only a week's break in between each menses.

So I went to the doctor and was prescribed DepoProvera to "regulate" my hormones and get things back to "normal." But after going on three separate occasions with no real results, I was prescribed birth-control pills at the age of 16. And wonder of wonders, the horrendous cramping was gone, I knew when the flow was going to be, and it was only 5 days long (at the most). Of course, as I have continued taking the Pill, my cramping has gotten a bit worse, and I do have breakthrough bleeding every month. But if I were given the opportunity to not have my period (or only have it 3 times a year), I would absolutely jump at the chance. In my opinion, menstruation is 1) messy, 2) painful, 3) expensive, and 4) totally unnecessary for me until I want to have children (which will not happen for a LONG time).

And from the same e-mail address a day later:

I am an educated male living in North America.

I see no reason why a woman should have to suffer the monthly effects of menstruation simply because of the taboos of society. Menstruation does not make a woman "feminine" or "more sexy." My fiancee monthly goes through the bloating, emotional difficulties, bleeding, etc. She told me about how in high school she couldn't get up to go to the bathroom and bled through her clothes. Imagine how embarrassing that must be!

In essence, I think a woman has the right to decide how her body should work. As long as she can still decide to have children, then why should she have to go through pain and discomfort of menstruation - that's what MEDICINE is for!

February 2001

"I don't have to anymore."

I am 60 and went through menopause almost twenty years ago. Had I known before the change that I could have used birth-control pills to stop bleeding, I would gladly have done so. I've never missed the monthly mess and in fact, was very depressed when I bled one more time after not doing so for eight months. I feel sorry for the younger women who are still going through hell for no reason. They have no idea how wonderful it is not to have to suffer each month. Women who wouldn't give it up have got to be out of their bloody minds!

February 2001

"If I could stop menstruating . . . "

I would! I am soon-to-be 34 years old. I have never wanted children and do not plan to have any. It bugs me that I have to be inconvenienced every month with various PMS [premenstrual syndrome] symptoms. Cramps, bloating, fatigue, problems concentrating - all for a biological process I have NO INTENTION OF USING! It's a pain!

February 2001

"No periods in this southern heat," writes the contributor:

I am 31 years old and have never had what would be considered difficult periods. Only I consider any period difficult. I studied herbal remedies, the moon theories, etc., in an effort to have control. Although I do not discount any of this knowledge I still feel so out of control. The mood swings, the messiness, the uncomfortable pads. Even though the bleeding only lasts about four days the whole experience seems to take about two weeks out of every month. Plus the mental energy expended to constantly be aware so there are no accidents.

Unfortunately DepoProvera did not work for me but I am still trying to find away to escape the menstrual prison and not become pregnant! Thanks so much for your Web site and your great information.

February 2001

"No periods? That's great!"

I'm 36 and have four kids. I'd LOVE to stop having periods. In fact, after my fourth child, nine years ago, I made a comment that since I was having no more children, it'd be great to not have periods either. Like someone else said, I'm sick of planning vacations and special times with my husband around my period. It doesn't always work out!

I've called my doctor and have an appointment next week. I hope she'll agree with me and I can start taking the Pill to get rid of periods. Has anyone had a doctor not "allow" them to do this simply because they didn't like the idea?

February 2001

I'd stop "in a heartbeat" if . . .

Just wanted to give you my two cents on the subject.

I'm a 29-year-old female whose been taking birth-control pills for over 10 years. I actually have never had any problems with the pills and it's been great to know what to expect and when to expect it every month. However, if I could find solid medical evidence that my period is not necessary and there could be some health benefit by only having it every three months, I would do it in a heartbeat. I actually heard about this concept months ago and was never able to find any info or a doctor who had an opinion one way or the other. I'm still researching it but I think it may be worth trying for an initial three months to see how I feel.

February 2001

An American writes about "respecting ourselves":

I really can't believe that women could be so hateful to their own bodies! Men have tried to convince us we are not "emotionally capable" of demanding work, corporations have made billions (or trillions??) with the false market of "feminine hygiene," and religions have tried to guilt-trip us to believe we deserve to be in pain for all our sins.

This is criminal! What if someone actually said that menstrual cycles could be FUN, BEAUTIFUL, HEALTHY, MAGICAL? What if a whole generation of women were raised to believe that their periods were . . . good?

I won't even bother arguing weather skipping periods is a health risk or not. But it should be obvious to anyone that self-loathing (especially about fundamental body functions) is definitely a health threat.

I beg anyone who is complaining about her period to reconsider how they view their body. Your period does NOT have to be dirty, stinky, painful, troublesome, expensive, or controlled by artificial drugs!!! Strangely enough, it's being working for women for thousands of years.

I have no interest arguing that our cycles are make us "real women" either. I think the only issue of concern here is women who are INSULTING their own bodies. No negative attitude like that could make anything enjoyable. And no drug can cure a negative attitude like that.

February 2001

"[T]ired of having to plan life around 'that time of the month'":

Information and choice are our rights! I am a 42-year-old female who has never wanted to have children. My husband and I have been together over 20 years and are tired of having to plan life around "that time of the month." Now that I am begining to experience some changes, it is great to have the information and choice.

February 2001

A Scandinavian likes stopping menstruation:

I am a young mother, just 23 years old. I got a wonderful boy seven months ago. Eleven weeks after the birth I got a Levonova hormone spiral. I have been very satisfied with it. I had some spotting the first month or so. And it occurs sometimes still. But it's only barely noticeable and never causes any trouble. So you can say I have stopped menstruating. I like it. Of course, I worry if it is good for my body. But I don't miss the bleeding!

February 2001

"I am 26, and I feel my period is a natural part of who I am":

I had my first period at age 14, and I have no desire to make it stop. When I'm premenstrual I have severe mood swings, I get headaches, backaches, moderate cramps, and a 5-7 day period a few days later. Despite that, I would not give it up.

I have learned how to predict my cycle, the natural way. After almost 9 years on the Pill, I feel much better without the hormone regulation. I am never surprised by my period because I know my own body and I know how to observe the changes in my cycle.

I do not feel controlled by my period, I have learned how to adapt and work within the perceived boundaries with no problems. Having a period, to me, is a constant reminder of my womanhood. I would not be myself without this cyclical pattern of regeneration.

I refute that women are controlled by anyone but themselves, we are all able to make our own choices for our reproductive health. Personally, I do not feel comfortable adding controls to the system nature has devised. That is not for me to abdicate to others, just a personal preference.

February 2001

One sister after another starts her period, which "suck":

Yes, I would most definitely stop it if I could. I can't believe I was actually jealous of my two older sisters when they got their first periods.

It seemed like such a cool thing, even though they never acted like it was. I didn't really understand too much about menstruation when my oldest sister got hers, but when my other sister did, I felt like it was a competition because she always kept ahead of me in development. I was only six when my oldest sister started menstruating. I remember it well because we were home alone and she was babysitting me. We were living in Manhattan in a really cool apartment that I still miss, and once she went into the bathroom, screamed, and I came running to see why. She said I wouldn't understand and told me to go get our downstairs neighbor, who was about 25 at the time and always was like a big sister to all of us, especially her (the oldest of my two sisters). I was wearing my bathing suit at the time, as I often did at that age, and I did as I was told. I remember saying to her that Briana was in the bathroom and she wouldn't come out or tell me what was wrong, and it seemed like as soon as I said 'bathroom' she knew what had happened. She said something about "having her first period" so the whole way upstairs I was furiously trying to get her to tell me what a period was. She rushed toward the bathroom, was let in, and I stood by the door, listening to her crying and the neighbor trying to comfort her. Finally, she came out and almost tripped over me, then took me by the hand and said we had to run to the store to buy "something." That something was pads because all she had or could find was tampons and she knew it wasn't the best for a first timer.

So together we went to the store, me still in my swim suit. Later, she ended up telling me about periods as best as one can explain that to a six-year-old, then my other sister came home and I told her and we talked about it for a while and several years later it was her turn, and then mine.

What a story! But anyway, periods suck [American slang meaning the writer doesn't like periods], which isn't to say I don't enjoy being a woman, but I would definitely like to get rid of it!

February 2001

From a male:

That [menstruation] is the sexiest thing about a woman; it also gives new life on this planet.

February 2001

"I guess I can dream about not having a period . . . ."

I would LOVE to have a healthy, safe way to stop menstruating. I am so tired of planning vacations around my period, dealing with pain, emotional swings, and having my body being in charge of my life, instead of me being in charge of my body.

I'm 29, and I think I began my periods at age 12. My teens were horrible; the cramps were so bad I'd end up lying on the bathroom floor because I couldn't stand up to go back to my bedroom.

I couldn't exercise during my period, because physical exertion would bring on excruciating cramps.

I actually vomited on a couple of occasions because the pain was so bad. I ended up getting a prescription for Darvon (a narcotic) for the cramps, when three ibuprofen at a time were insufficient.

My doctor never suggested (not to my knowledge, anyway) birth control pills as an option, but I really wish he had. To top it off, I had to take iron supplements for iron-deficiency anemia, probably because of heavy monthly blood loss. On top of it, I endured some very embarrassing "accidents." And painful breasts, and bloating, and acne, and low back pain. Joy.

When I finally did go on the Pill, they were a relative godsend - periods that I could actually predict, lighter flow, much less cramping, and shorter flow times (only five days!).

Those were triphasic pills, and after several years, I started spotting between periods, having heavier flows, and getting really emotional again (plus breast tenderness). Now I'm on monophasic pills, which so far have just given me unpredictable flows and slightly longer flow times (six, sometimes seven days instead of five).

I am also one of those women who has never, ever wanted children, and I never will. I just don't.

I know that in society's eyes this makes me a freak, a monster, "unfeminine" - shall I go on?

My husband has accepted my choice - so why can't everyone else?

Anyway, I really appreciate this opportunity to vent. As soon as there's a safe and healthy alternative to this monthly burden, I'll be the first in line!

February 2001

"Menstruation was the power to have children," but . . .

No choice. At 53 I'm menopausal. But I recall when menstruation started. And my silent celebration.

My first period began with a bit of a mystery. I was perhaps twelve years old. I felt cramps, and woke up with some dark staining in my pajama bottoms. I told my mother I did not feel well, thinking I had diarrhea, and stayed home from school. I was puzzled because the diarrhea seemed to leak, and I put some toilet paper in my pants. When the stain slowly increased, it suddenly dawned on me what was happening. I ran out of the upstairs bathroom, and from the top of the stairs yelled excitedly to my mother that my period had begun. She was mildly surprised, but set about teaching what to do. I resented my mother showing me how to put a pad on; I did not like her looking at my nakedness. And I hated the elastic belt and the bulky pad attached to it. Only later would I learn about the box of Tampax she kept "hidden" high on a shelf in the bathroom closet.

But that night, as I fell asleep, I smiled and felt wonderful in the glow of mild cramping, feeling the warm sticky blood against my flesh. I had passed into womanhood and adulthood. Menstruation was the power to have children. How strange I'd be the one to grow up and never marry and have children. It had been a fantasy all my teen years. I would even look out my window some nights before falling asleep, and look at the moon thinking my future husband might also be looking at the same time. And I'd wonder what he was like, what he looked like. It just never happened.

All my life my periods were perfect. A bit of cramping in my teens, but by my twenties I could predict my next period within half a day. No side effects except a weight gain each month and, two or three months a year, some real depression that preceded my period. And my menopause was easy, with only some mild night sweats. There was a year with a bit of irregularity and then it just stopped, never to return. The year after was my most stable emotionally, my joking to myself that was because I had no hormones. The best year of my life.

My experience with HRT [hormone-replacement therapy] afterwards is a whole different, and difficult, story.

February 2001

"I'm very pleased not having to menstruate."

I'm currently in a relationship (four years) and we're both certain that we'll get married and have children, but not for the first coming two years. So, after taking a combination pill (oestrogen-progesterone) for three years I was sick of it. It made me feel fat, depressed, and I still had pains when I menstruated.

So I started a search for a new system for birth control and came across this invention Implanon. This small tube (I have no other word for it) is inserted in your upper arm between your biceps and triceps and it sends out a hormone regularly. The advantage for me is that this thing uses another kind of hormone that got rid of the side effects I experienced whilst taking the pill.

And I got an extra out of it too: I stopped menstruating. So this was not an intended result, but I have to say that I'm very pleased not having to menstruate. No worries about bringing along tampons and clean underwear everywhere I go, no periods of PMS and greasy hair and skin.

But all the other responses to this question on your site made me think. I feel great now, so it doesn't feel like I'm doing something bad to my body (and of course I rely on my gynaecologist's not giving me harmful medication), but I have to agree that I feel pressured under the whole period/pregnancy/cleansing-cult that says you have to menstruate because it's good for you, it's meant to be like this.

Maybe I'll regret not having investigate the consequences of Implanon on my body more. But the happiness and optimism I'm experiencing now makes me forget about possible negative effects later on. And because in a year or two, I'll stop taking birth control I know I'll be stuck with depression, pains, and zits again because you have to menstruate in order to get pregnant.

Knowing what I know now, I'm guessing that after my pregnancies I'll return to the Implanon and be glad not having to menstruate again.

February 2001

"I would not give it up."

Ok, had you asked me the question when I first began menses, I am sure that I would have said Yes, take the darn thing away. I was in pain (the kind that keeps one in bed with the heating pad); I was never sure if I was going to get my period and just how long it would last.

Today, at 33 years of age, I would not give it up. It is not that I throw a monthly party, but I am taking a college class at the University of Washington called The Psychobiology of Women. The things that I have learned about my body are amazing! It is like a symphony constantly playing, hormones from one area cueing another instrument to play. I feel that knowledge is the best key; once you understand what and why it is much easier to handle once a month. I have so much more respect for MY symphony!

Thank you for creating this site! I cannot get enough of it!! [Thanks!] I have passed it on to many of my friends and my sister and mother!

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!! [YOU'RE WELCOME!!!]

February 2001

A 15-year-old Canadian writes,

Personally, I would not stop. I'm not going to let society's fear of blood make me screw up my body with chemicals. I really hate my period, the blood, the pain, the mood swings, but I feel that if my body is doing it, I'm not going to mess with nature.

February 2001

A Canadian writes, "Periods are great!"

I've never had a problem with my periods: never had cramps, PMS, or discomfort.

I think they are natural and I wouldn't stop them; why should I?

They are part of nature and they don't bother me at all. It ain't stopping me from doing activities, it ain't stopping me from going out and enjoying myself, it ain't stopping me from having sex or from having a pleasant life, so why should I complain ?

I'm a perfectly healthy and pretty girl, university student and happy to be a woman and who I am!

February 2001

DEFINITELY YES! And for her daughter, too.

I am a 52-year-old North American and have just begun to have irregular periods which I hope means that real soon they will stop for ever!

My 13-year-old daughter just had her first period and I am hoping that soon "no periods" will become a reality for her.

February 2001

A 21-year-old Australian writes, "I'm lost without it."

To answer that question:

Funny this should come up when I'm currently going through a very unusual period. Here I am, waiting to bleed, when I've had all the signals that I "should" be menstruating. First, I had the usual five or so days of increasing bad moods, lack of patience, depression, then the weaker pre-bleeding cramps - and now I'm waiting for the blood to start and I realised, man, it's like a purging for me. I'm lost without it.

It's something I've had for years in my life, and as much as I don't like it, it's something I need to go through. I have really painful periods, and they lay me out once a month. To be honest, I like the chance to relax, even if I'm in pain. Cause I can't do anything for that first two days but bleed.

On talking to my mother about this issue (a woman who's had seven children, and is currently going through menopause), I thought on a few other reasons why I wouldn't stop my periods. The ones she gave were very interesting. "It's a part of a woman's body clock," she said, "You need that pacing."

We both understood that some women might need to stop (weddings, jobs in isolated places, etc.), and it's natural that something like this would vary from woman o woman. Many women might stop their menstruation, but I wouldn't.

You could ask when going through the worst of my cramps, Would I get rid of them? Still, the answer would be no. Not only, during those enduring moments between the first cramping and the kicking in of the pain-killers, does my uterus go through it's own cleansing when I'm experiencing my periods, but my spirit seems to release a little of it's own grit, too. Excruciating pain is always a great reminder of our humanity, of our weaknesses. When I'm sitting there, bundled up in blankets and with my hot water bottle, reading or drawing, waiting for the pain to recede, I always find myself thinking, "Why, God? Why do we have to go through this? What did women do to have to suffer this?"

Well, I can pretty much have a child whenever I want, even though I'm not at a stage in my life where that is possible. It's a gift, the ability to bear child. Something a man will never know, is the feeling of having a living being inside of him, of feeling it grow, of going through the agony of childbirth, of watching that child grow after sustaining it with one's own body. I know "that" is why I menstruate. That's the price I pay for fertility and childbirth. Sure, those things aren't a holiday in and of themselves, but since they are priceless things to me, a bit of pain as payment seems like a sure bargain, because it goes away, and I'll be okay after a few days. I'll be left with a fresh optimism, 'cause I know, "Hey, I'm free for another three weeks! Yay!"

And when my periods come again, I'll swear and complain, bloat and eat, and get cranky. But that's periods. At least I can expect those. That's something I take comfort in.

Regards

February 2001

 

About "that monthly thing":

HELL YEAH!! I would do anything to make them stop!

I have been sterilised since I was 29 so after that decision there was no need for my period, but I still get my period every month. Now in the early stages of menopause they are still as regular as ever. I do wish they would stop forever or that I could do something to make them stop as there is no point to me having them!

January 2001

"Yes," short and sweet:

Yes, I would stop and then when I wanted a child I would start again.

January 2001

A Midwesterner of Puerto Rican-Jewish heritage is undecided:

I am 27 now and started menstruating at 13. It was never extremely painful or heavy, but I dislike any kind of discomfort or annoyance. I had Depo Provera shots [read many more comments about Depo in the items below] for three years and loved never having a period. About two years ago I started taking the Pill instead because I knew I would be having children in the near future and wanted to do it on my own timing rather than wait indefinitely for my body to cycle again.

I would stop having periods if I knew there were no side effects - but this world has never been that easy. Both Depo and the Pill resulted in extra hair growth after the first two years. I already had more body hair than most women I came into contact with, so I was not pleased! I cycle between that feeling and being annoyed at myself for shaving my legs and underarms because that is an ungodly hassle and is definitely unnatural!

Somewhere along the way we have to decide which of society's silly rules we will go along with to fit in and which are not worth compromising ourselves for. And I am still deciding. ;) So bring on the research! I will read it and maybe try it - and laser eye surgery.

January 2001

"I hate my period," writes this woman, and "[p]eriod/pregnancy-cult people are really the ones stigmatizing women":

First off I'd like to comment on how much I enjoy this site. [Thanks!]

In response to your question: YES. Menstruation is just another way to stigmatize and hold women down. It's not magical or cleansing, just another bodily function, on the same level as defecation or urination.

I have known since early adolescence that children are not in my future and have no need for a period. I wish a doctor would take pity on me and release me from this expensive inconvenience. I do not associate periods with femininity. Sometimes I think I'd be happier as a man. [Men sure have far fewer male-only things that are both normal and often sources of trouble, comparable to women's pregnancy, childbirth and menstruation.] Menstruation turns my body against itself; I have not felt "at home" in my body since menarche at the age of 12.

Girls who menstruate early are at a higher risk for breast cancer due to elevated estrogen levels. If periods are so "healthy," I'd like someone to explain that. Period/pregnancy-cult people are really the ones stigmatizing women. If a woman doesn't want to menstruate, she should make that decision without the guilt. Sometimes it seems like other women are our biggest enemies.

January 2001

A 47-year-old Dutch woman writes, "Yes, I would."

When there's a pill that will stop menstruation without risks, I will swallow it immediately. Always the same problems with menstruation. It starts when you forgot to put new tampax in your bag. It falls in the days that it is almost impossible to reach a toilet.

All those practical problems. And then I did not even mention the physical problems. Like the irritation caused by the sanitary napkins [a problem mentioned in a report in 1945, the Dickinson Report].

January 2001

Endometrial ablation solved this American-from-Hawaii's menstrual misery

I had very heavy periods, and NEVER regular, since I was 12. Sometimes I would miss weeks; sometimes I would flow for weeks.

In my 30s I finally got FED up with ALL of it, since trying to have sex with my spouse was beginning to look like an "ax murder" at the end of each session and my flow had been going on for about three years by then (with no stops!).

All the HMOs [health maintenance organizations] I tried could only recommend pills (for the hormone "problems" I was having - too much estrogen, not enough progesterone) or the inevitable, WHOLE hysterectomy option.

I was scared to death of having them yank all my guts out from hearing horror stories before. And I certainly did NOT want to live on DepoProvera (Progesterone) [read discussions of this in entries below] the rest of my life due to the gut-wrenching side affects I always encountered (feeling like I was constantly pregnant!).

SO, only when I relocated to another area, did I find my HMO wasn't covered in the Zip code [the American postal code] I lived in, which forced me to have to find a PPO, or in my case Blue Cross [a health insurance organization] (no plug).

Suddenly a whole new WORLD of different options opened up for me.

For the first time I had HOPE of some sort of relief.

Since I never had any sort of endometriosis [a painful disease caused by pieces of the lining of the uterus - the endometrium - somehow located in the wall of the rectum, bladder, etc.] I was a VERY good candidate for a very new procedure called endometrial oblation, where I didn't have to lose ONE single part or egg. I could even keep my beloved cervix (that added a great sexual enhancement to both me and my spouse during lovemaking).

This procedure was considered "outpatient surgery," though you needed a driver to take you home, due to the drugs they put you under.

But all it consisted of was, in common terms, a "permanent scraping," or a permanent D&C [dilation and curettage] of the uterus lining. Nothing more. (The doc would compare it to coring out an apple down to like a quarter of an inch while leaving the skin in tact.)

It took all of one hour, I could go back to work in two days, and I haven't bled since. It's been nearly 10 years. And I still find many people have still never heard of this procedure.

I did have to go to an obstetrical-gynecological surgeon who specialized in this procedure. But the BEST part is:

I still ovulate; I still have what I call are "my periods," you know, the tiny mood swings, the incredible orgasms, an occasional sore breast, but absolutely NO cramps, no BLOOD, and being able to KEEP every thing I had. The only difference is that I had to decide that I wouldn't be able to conceive again. But I had my grown child by then and I was tired of bleeding!

This procedure SAVED MY LIFE.

I was going through literally TWO tampons with a night time PAD every 2-3 hours. I had to be on iron pills and I thought, "WHAT the HECK do women want to BLEED for if they are DONE having kids???"

To the lady that LOVES to bleed: I respect her thoughts, though I think she needs some educating, but SHE can have MINE and a few million others, I'm sure!

Oh, yes: I will NEVER go back to an HMO!

Thanks for letting me share!

[Later she added this:]

I should tell you that this procedure was one done

vaginally, with a tiny microscopic tube that had a small blades he scraped each layer with and then went back with a hot roller cauterizing the area he had just done.

The tube (also) had a camera in there somewhere, so I was able to get the video of the operation. In fact it's what they hand everyone who goes through this.

I believe it's done with a lot of water in there, like some sort of flusher and vacuum to clean away the scrapings.

It was amazing to watch.

Though the entire tube (with the camera) was probably no bigger than my little finger, the "movie" gave it a "monster shot" appearance, so it was quite shocking at first.

Thanks for reading.

Aloha

[Read about ThermaChoice, an alternative to the writer's ablation, although with similar results.]

January 2001

"Maybe," writes an American beginner

I'm not sure; I've only had them for about a month, but my friends tell me that they're sooo horrible, so maybe!!

January 2001

The writer, from Sacramento, California, says "I use it, I NEED it!"

I started a month before I turned 16, and I would've gladly waited even longer because it was terrible right from the start. I had horrible cramps every month for years, and tried every drug available with varying success.

In my early 30s the cramps lessened, but I still dreaded it every month. But I'm an artist, and I look at everything as potential art material (or at least as inspiration), and one day I took a close look at a used napkin. I discovered I liked the variety of patterns on all the napkins I'd used that day. I started saving them - dozens of them over many months. To my surprise, they didn't smell at all once they dried. I cut them into 2" squares, peeled them apart to remove the sawdust-like stuff inside, and stitched the squares to a piece of fabric. I called the little quilt-like thing "O.T.R." (for "on the rag"). After that, I figured I'd done all I could do with blood, but one day I was trying to find a particular shade and quality of red, and I couldn't find a paint that was just right. So I took a sheet of paper and wiped it between my legs. The blood was perfect for my artwork! Since then I've made several pieces using photocopies of antique books (including Dr. Pierce's medical guide) stained with blood. I varnish the paper and stitch it to fabric, or just stitch scraps of paper together. I like the way the blood oxidizes, and the way it randomly clumps over some areas of text and barely covers other areas.

I'm 39 now and I dread menopause. Even if I don't have a particular art project in mind, every month I have a supply of photocopies ready to be stained for future use. I don't consider my work "feminist." The blood symbolizes many things to me: fear, mystery, self-recognition, self-assurance, and life itself. I've exhibited my work in galleries, even inviting my coworkers to view it. They've been surprisingly open and interested in it - even the guys, which REALLY surprised me. What I really enjoy is when viewers try to decipher the text, not aware they're looking through blood. I'm forcing them to look at something that's considered taboo, and the experience doesn't bother them because they're unaware of it.

So to sum up this long story, NO, I don't want my periods to stop. I need that blood - it's my favorite art material! [See more menstruation-associated artwork.]

January 2001

A man who wants, needs a period!

My friend's father has hemochromatosis. This is a disease which, I believe, causes too much iron to build up in the liver. He has to donate blood once a month to rid himself of the excess iron. I am not sure of the mechanics of this, but that is what he tells me. He said that women don't get this disease too often because they have their monthly periods, which naturally rids the body of excess iron. He said he would "die for a period." =)

[And excess iron has been linked with heart and artery disease.]

January 2001

"Definitely!"

I'm a 23-year-old woman from Long Island, New York, and I have had my period since I was 12. And each and every month since that first time I have been faced with cramps, muscle aches, mood swings, migraines, and also an irritable bowel that left me running for the bathroom either to release my intestinal pain or to change my pad.

Stained clothes? I have made quite the collection over the years along with sheets, and towels. No matter how many times I changed my pad or tampon, it's just a plain mess. And your period isn't just those 5-7 days where the flow is actually there; it's at least 5-6 days before that and lasts another 3-4 afterwards. The feeling of being dirty and smelly - as you know your period is on the way - you don't feel like being intimate (although I must admit that I am as horny as ever right before my period) and then afterwards. Sometimes it may just come back after you think it's over, ever so slightly to mess with you: LOVELY!!! So where does that leave me? A little less than two weeks a month for me not to have to worry about the whole mess? WHY?

And to think some women believe this whole menstruating thing to be "feminine" and somehow a way to show our womanhood. I can be all the woman I want to be even more if I didn't have to constantly deal with and hide from others my "monthly friend." [Read more words used for menstruation in many languages.] Believe me, if any of my friends made me feel this horrible every month why would I want them to keep coming around??

So to reiterate would I want to stop getting my period? YES YES YES

PLEASE sign me up!!!

January 2001

Menstruation makes a 26-year-old American feel sexy:

No, I don't think that I would get rid of my period if I could. For me, cramps are minor and isolated to the first few days of menstruation. I enjoy the cramps I get the same way I enjoy the muscle pain after a really good beneficial work out.

I don't know why, but I feel sexy when I'm menstruating. I realized at some point in college that that was when I was most likely to get dolled up and go to parties. I think I met several boyfriends while menstruating. From ovulation through menstruation I am most interested in sex, most emotional, and also most able to achieve sexual climax. I think all of that is certainly worth a mess. I know that I'm lucky, and that many women have a very painful, sometimes physically and emotionally draining period every month, and there needs to be a better solution for them than the current pill, but for me, I enjoy my period right now. I highly recommend "Instead" [menstrual cup; compare Instead with the The Keeper cup and read a history of cups], cloth pads, and a good sexual partner [you have to make your own link].

From "Menstruation Hater Extraordinaire," in Tennessee (U.S.A.)

OH, HELL, YES!

If I could, I would have stopped it permanently the first day I had it, when I was nine years old. I'm 41, and it's been nothing but a living hell for me since Day One. I have to take prescription medicine to keep the pain from disabling me, which it did every month for years.

In addition to the immense physical pain, I've also had the "pleasure" of going through changes in mood each month, ranging from depression to rage.

To make matters worse, I've never wanted children, so having a period has been one big fucking waste of time and an unneeded and unwanted 32-year torture session.

I laugh at people who equate having a period with femininity. Not having a period doesn't make you less of a woman, just as infertility doesn't make someone less of a woman.

And don't think that I'm not planning to have a serious word or two with God about this abomination and insult to womanhood He's cursed me with. ;)

Do you think I sound angry and bitter? Maybe it's because I'm having my period right now.

January 2001

Stopping menstruation is disturbing

My mom told me about the argument that menstruation is obsolete, and I was immediately disturbed. How much can science make us unnatural before we take responsibility for our actions instead of curbing our natural processes with modern "medicine"? There have to be some major changes in the body in such a drastic thing such as taking menstruation away for a period of months.

January 2001

No, this Canadian wants to continue

My period is a source of power. It cycles with the moon, which is a symbol of the power of women. I am in rhythm with the earth and other women in the world when I cycle. I find it amazing to feel my body ovulate, and then wait for the bleeding. I am a complex being because of the cycle and am thus capable of bringing forth life. I would NEVER choose to stop menstruating as it is a ritual that I value deeply.

I think the recent articles about the obsoleteness of menstruation are just another form of period shame that the media is trying to instill in women so that they can become the consumers of yet another unhealthy hazardous product that someone without a uterus invented. I feel empowered to be a woman on this earth, and I will menstruate to the cycle of the moon until I reach menopause.

At that point, I will rejoice in reaching true maturity.

January 2001

This American has had enough

Yes. At age 40 and two kids, I'm tired of it. I have very little cramping, no mood swings, so I'm lucky in that respect.

My period never bothered me until after I became pregnant and nursed. After not having had a period for about 15 months, I was annoyed when it came back. Then a few months later I became pregnant again and had another no-period cycle.

So now I just look upon it as a messy bother and I think I will be happy when I reach menopause.

January 2001

An American writes, "Yes, I would give up my cycle."

I would definitely give up my cycle. I am 24 years old and have had one since I was 11. They have been nothing but pain and torture for me. My cycles were never 5 to 7 days, more like they were gone for 5 to 7 days. They were always very heavy and I had the worst cramps.

When I got married and decided to have children, I tried for five-and-a-half years to get pregnant, always hoping each month, and always finding out "not this time."

I don't feel that having a period makes me a woman, or that it is a natural experience. There is nothing normal about bleeding for a week straight every month. Anything else that did that would be dead. :)

Sign me up for the Pill. PLEASE!!!!

January 2001

"I sure wish I could stop," writes an American:

Honestly, I don't know. I'd like to, but I have no crystal ball to tell me what the after-effects might do to my body. I sure wish I could stop, though.

I've always prided myself on my intellect and independence. I am firmly committed to childless-by-choice/overpopulation issues (but I am not one of those mean-spirited, hateful alt.support.child-free folk; don't associate me with them). Ergo, I really don't have any need for a reproductive system at all, let alone one that menstruates. Also, I have to disagree with the camp within feminism that calls it "moontime" and argues its sacredness. I don't hate my body or my womanhood just because I'd rather not hemorrhage from the genitals, thanks. I also hate feeling out-of-control, going from rational and level-headed to gobbling Snickers and Doritos by the pound while weeping along to Tori Amos CDs. Why is it that I have to love that painful, unhealthy, uncomfortable state in order to love myself and my body? That's crazy. If being weepy and crampy and breeding babies is what being a woman is all about, then make me an androgyne!

December 2000

An American says "yes":

I'm quite undecided. I am a seventeen year old woman from Chicago. I had my first period at 10. I had ALWAYS hated getting my period. It always came in a bad time and I was always in severe pain. I now feel that getting my period means I am healthy and not pregnant. Then again, I would MOST DEFINITELY SHORTEN the duration of my monthly friend. The money aspect: tampons cost HOW MUCH ??!!, the inconvenience, and the pain would be significantly changed for the better!

Thanks a lot!

December 2000

A 25-year-old Depo Provera user who wrote earlier comments about others' e-mails, this site, etc.

As I approach the age 26, I know thoughts and perceptions change, as do those of anyone who gets older.

First of all, I want to thank you for your site, especially these pages. [You're welcome!]

Recently, I switched health insurance companies, and I had to decide whether to pay for Depo out of my own pocket, or go with the pills that my insurance pays for and hopefully find one that is right and healthy for me.

For the meantime, I chose to continue with Depo. My decision wasn't based as much upon dealing with a period again as much as it was upon knowing what is safe for me. My husband wants to have a child now, but we both have health issues that we have to deal with. Mine right now is two abnormal pap smears in the last year. As informative as your site has become, can you provide some links to that issue, if you don't/can't cover it yourself? That would be really appreciated. [I'll try. Can anyone suggest some?]

Anyway, I enjoyed visiting your site again and reading the most recent responses to your "Would you stop menstruating?" question. Thought-provoking as they are, they have elicited some responses from me:

The first is in regards to the 16-year-old Brazilian who almost became anorectic. She observed that an irregular period is a sign of bad health.

Good for her! I guess that in most cases it is, but what about us that have never had a regular period? I can honestly tell you that stress or excessive weight gain/loss have not been the reasons for mine.

A Belgian and another lady mentioned the lack of libido (sex-drive) due to the pill. That does not surprise me. Depo, for me, is the same way.

In my case, it is probably good. Actually, I have a husband or significant other that I care very much about, and he does a good job of rectifying this situation.

Polycystic ovarian syndrome. Do you have more information? [Only this site.]

A 19-year-old claims birth control is not good for a young age? Is having children when you're not ready for them good for a young age?

The other comment that I noticed was that menstruation causes cancer.

Doesn't everything else cause cancer as well? Smoking. Drinking. Eating the right foods. Eating the wrong foods. Even birth control supposedly causes cancer.

I admire the woman that looks at menstruation as a wonderful, beautiful thing. Not only teenagers, but also women who have experienced it for decades. It is a totally natural process.

But for those of us who can't/won't do it, that doesn't make us unfeminine. We have valid reasons for not wanting to menstruate right now. My husband has health problems that he wants to make sure aren't hereditary, and I have health problems that make me wonder if I can even have more kids.

Keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

And thank you again for this site.

January 2001

"Take my period away from me before I go mad!"

Every time I have my period I hate everybody. I can't stand them! I feel sick and I can't stand to be touched!

If I was to no longer have my periods I would be 100 times better!

I find the whole "event" disgusting and it could even take me up to five hours to be able to insert a tampon. I tried towels once but just the thought of collecting blood in my knickers makes me want to chuck!

December 2000

"Yes," writes this Australian:

Most definitely, I hate periods. I am a lesbian, with no intentions of ever having children. Periods make my life a misery and have for the past 20 years.

[She later added this:]

I am Australian and I worked for many years in an all-male maximum security prison. One day I was pulling a handkerchief out of my pocket and a tampon fell out and rolled across the floor. There were several male officers present, but no one had seen what had happened. So I very discreetly walked over to the tampon and very quickly bobbed down and picked it up. Congratulating myself on my discretion that my fellow officers had not seen the offending article, I turned around to see about 20 prisoners watching me intently with huge grins on their faces which turned to peals of laughter as my face turned bright red. [This reminds me of an ad for the obsolete Pursettes tampons.]

December 2000

Most post-menopausal women seem to be happy to stop menstruating (a Gallup Survey confirmed this a few years ago), like this one

Having to have a hysterectony at the age of 45 was one of the best things to happen in my life. I wish it would have happened when I was 20.

I was a mental mess for two weeks out of each month because of those darn hormones. I also had very heavy periods, causing that "Oh, no! Could I be leaking?" syndrome. I am very glad it's gone for good.

I am now 54 and have gone through menopause without any symptoms or problems.

December 2000

She entitled this e-mail "Seasonale," the stop-menstruation pill awaiting approval:

I am an 18-year-old woman, and I would give up my monthly hell in a second.

When I do eventually go on the Pill, I will most definitely take the opportunity to skip my periods. Why? Menstruating is an unnecessary thing in today's society. We all do our utmost to disguise and hide the fact that we're menstruating, why not stop it altogether? It has done nothing for me but cause me pain and irritation. I detest the fact that one week out of every month is dominated by the fact that I'm bleeding and in pain. I hate that it comes at unwelcome times and limits my activities. Menstruating does not make me feel feminine, and anyone who thinks it does must have some serious insecurities regarding their femininity.

My periods are only slightly regular; I only ever have a vague idea of when it might come. I usually know the week it will come, but the exact day remains a mystery, regardless of how much counting I do. The result is a week wasted checking for my period obsessively, and the additional waste of pads used in anticipation of the flow. If I could eliminate that stress, I would be the happiest woman in the world.

I guess this is really a personal decision, but I honestly can't imagine how anyone could enjoy menstruating. My only guess is that they really have no idea of what it is to have a truly heavy, painful period (even if they say they have them themselves, I can't BELIEVE anyone would happily go through what I do every month; that's pure masochism). In my opinion, preventing a period is no worse than preventing a pregnancy...so sign me up!

December 2000

NEXT: page 3 (August - December 2000)

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