Would you stop menstruating if you could?
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and Would you stop menstruating if you could?
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A 21-year-old American college student writes, "Why stop now?":
"OH YES!!!!!!!" writes a woman from the United Kingdom (I think):
A 21-year-old American writes, "Would I stop menstruating?":
"Heck, yeah!"
"I would not stop menstruating if I could!"
A Norwegian writes that stopping menstruation "would be heaven!":
"Yes," writes another Norwegian:
"No, I wouldn't stop menstruation!!!" e-mails a Brazilian:
"Not for me! I'll keep my period, thank you!"
She's all for her period:
A Zimbabwean titles her e-mail "With pleasure!"
"Yessss!" writes this Belgian:
The contributor called this "the Pill":
An Australian calls her message "low haemoglobin count":
"Where's that pill?"she writes in the subject line.
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Most assuredly. Take it away NOW.
I get cramps bad enough to double me over, bleed like a stuck pig, get nauseous, get migraines, get diarrhea, get bad PMS, and really don't like the idea that this is power or some primal womanly thing. If it's so powerful, why does it make me feel like crap every single month?
I've had my period since I was 12. Spending one week per month in misery has cost me almost eight years of my life in pain. No more!
(November 2000)
I am a 39-year-old who has had her period since I was 12. I experienced bad cramps for the first four years. When I decided to get married I went on birth control pills. When the time came for us to have children I stopped taking the pills. I had my second child when I was 32 years. old. Since that time my periods have become very irregular and quite often would last seven to nine days and then a week later start again. I questioned my obstetrician/gynecologist about this. His reply: "You are in your 30s and your periods are bound to get abnormal." I suffered with this up until this past year when we moved and I told my new ob/gyn (who happens to be woman) about all the discomforts I had been having for the past seven years.
She ran some tests and found that I was peri-menopausal. I would get night sweats and mood swings that were unbelievable. When I asked her what my options were she showed me an article that was just recently published that stated that for most woman who experienced bad menstrual cycles (PMS) or who were suffering with the peri-menopausal symptoms the pill could be taken continuously. I don't take the placebo pills. When I finish one pack I move right onto another.
There is NO reason for me to bleed each month. I have my children. Do not desire any more. Having my period had become unpredictable, uncomfortable and has ruined many a family vacation/holiday. The article states that "bleeding" releases the lining that your body was preparing for in the case of a pregnancy. If you take the pill on a continued basis the lining does not build up as this is done during the time you are taking the placebos. You are putting your ovaries "to sleep." When you stop taking the pills your cycle starts again. If there is no tissue build up then there is no reason to bleed. Monthly bleeding does not cleanse the body of any harmful diseases or chemicals. It does nothing but show that you are not pregnant.
My doctor has recommended that I have a period every six months. That is good enough for me. Some doctors' views on that are from three to six months and I have even spoken to some who leave it totally up to the woman and if they choose not to have a period then that's their decision. This also is prescribed for woman who suffer from moderate-to-severe endometriosis. By taking the pill continuously, they don't have the endometrial lining build up.
Bottom line: NO PERIOD FOR ME, PLEASE. I don't need that monthly reminder to feel like a woman. I have a husband who does that for me.
(November 2000)
When I read that some doctors think that menstrual cycles are "obsolete" I was mad as hell (and then some), to put it mildly. Here I am, 33 years old, and for the first time in my life had two periods in a row which excites me to no end. I have polycystic ovarian syndrome, which is an endocrine imbalance that causes excess androgens in my system and other lovely symptoms such as excess weight gain around the middle, hirsuitism, balding in the scalp hair and severe acne.
This imbalance has made me feel less then feminine all my life since my body doesn't react like other women's. I like it when I have my period because I feel feminine and I feel good!
(November 2000)
I am a 19-year-old from the U.S.A. I have had my period since I was 10 years old.
I don't think I would mind the period so much if it didn't come with the bloating, mood swings, irritability and the really bad cramps that I get. I get cramps so badly that I can't walk and have to miss work and school. None of the pills that are out to help with sort of stuff ever helps, such as Midol or Pampren. In order for them to work I have to take like eight at a time and that's not good for me.
I recently started taking birth control pills for my cramps. And let me tell you it has done wonders. I have not had cramps with my period since I started to take them. Yes, taking the birth control pill has altered other things and is not the best way to deal with this, but I could not deal with the cramps any longer. Sure, the birth control pill has made me gain some weight in my chest, but I would take having a bigger chest over not having those cramps any day.
So, if I were able to take this pill and be able to stop taking it when I wanted to have children in the near future, I would have to stop and think is it really that important and what would be the side affects of the pill. How do I know that I would be able to have children after taking this pill? If I took it and then later found out I could not have children because of this, I would completely regret it.
I would take the birth control pills any day. Sure, birth control is not the best thing for young girls, but for me it has certainly done wonders. Having my period is still a pain in my butt, but at least the cramps are no longer there. And my period used to last from 7-8 days and come at least 2 days early. Now they are regular and only last from 4-5 days.. So I can deal with that. Thanks!
(November 2000)
I'm disappointed in women who view menstruation as the cornerstone of their femininity. Why reduce the role of woman to a mere bodily function or the ability to conceive? I believe it is an affront to post-menopausal, sterile and childless women. Being a woman is far greater than this primitive, messy inconvenience dubbed "a natural process." How many new-age, granola-crunching feminists are going to give up their indoor plumbing, cars and heated homes? In a "natural" state none of those conveniences would exist. I hate periods. For me, they are nothing but an insignificant, filthy nuisance.
(November 2000)
I only menstruate three times a year. I'm a much happier person because of it.
The downside? Facial hair. I mean like man whiskers! I suspect I have polycystic ovary syndrome, (a link to that site might be good) which has to do with having fibroids on the ovaries. Anyway, I'm 40 now and I've been sporadically menstruating since I was 26, after the birth of my son. I would have to say in all honesty that I enjoy my life much more now because of not having mood swings and all of the other symptoms associated with menstruation. On the other hand, there's something very sensual and feminine about having them that I miss. There's a different kind of sex drive now too. My theory is because there's less estrogen and more testosterone in my system. It's more like, "satisfy it now and be done with it" rather than the long, lingering, feeling of experiencing the whole act of sexuality, the mental as well as the physical. It's hard to describe, but this is my attempt.
Anyway, I now know for a fact that everything we feel is due to our hormones, not our minds.
(November 2000)
I am a 14-year-old who started at age 12. Yah, I HATE it! It stops me from doing a lot of stuff I don't want to do, because I am in so much pain. It is necessary for me to have kids, which I want when I am married and happily settled, but if I can stop taking this "Miracle pill" whenever I want and still have kids, ya, I'd go for it! Definitely. But if it was so I couldn't have kids, heck, it's a pain, but I want a kid someday, so I'll put up with it.
(November 2000)
. . . if I could do so without any ill effects, and if I could still have babies. Yeah, having periods reminds me that I am a woman and all that, and mine aren't really all that bad - no pain, etc., but still inconvenient and messy. Yeah, I guess I would stop, although I don't feel all that strongly about it either way.
When I was younger, though, I regularly PRAYED for them to stop, 'cause I hated them. I was embarrassed, thought I smelled bad, and could never remember to carry pads or tampons when I needed them.
(November 2000)
Ha! I'm 18 and I used to think it would be great to stop having periods; mine have been bad since I started at age 12, with the associated cramps and back pain, cravings, weepiness, and extreme mood swings. But now, now that I'm coming on two weeks late, you just have no idea how much I want all those things. Please let it be tomorrow . . . .
(November 2000)
If I could stop menstruating right now, I would. Most definitely.
Since I started getting my periods, at age 11 (I'm 18 now), I have been begging for a hysterectomy. I am ready for menopause NOW.
I don't like children. I didn't like children when I was a child. I never owned a baby doll. I do not want to produce life, ever.
My periods last anywhere from 10 to 12 days, I'm a heavy bleeder for all of them, especially at night. I get horrible cramps, my face breaks out, I'm irritable, I get dizzy, nauseous, and shaky, and I can't eat very well. I end up very tired throughout the period, because I can't sleep through the horrible cramps. I also experience cold chills and hot flashes.
Not only is it regular as clockwork, it's regularly EARLY. So I really only have about a week and a half to two weeks every month that I am not experiencing bloody Hell.
I can't use tampons, because my periods are so heavy that they leak anyway, and I have to wear a pad with them, and if I'm going to wear a pad anyway, then why bother with the tampon and the risk of toxic shock syndrome? I have destroyed numerous pairs of pants and skirts from leaky pads, and it's not like I don't change them. I can leak after just putting on a fresh one.
My period gets so bad that I have to leave school often, and as I pay for time I miss, four dollars an hour, that's not the best thing in the world.
I see menstruation as a punishment for women. Eve ate the fruit, Eve was a woman, therefore, we must all suffer. Whoever said taking a pill to stop them was bowing to a man and their idea that we shouldn't menstruate can take my hellish periods. I don't want them. Give me the pill any day.
(November 2000)
I say yes! I'd stop menstruating immediately - and forever. I'm 30, I have my periods since I'm 11. And I always hated them. My husband and I do not want to have any children, so for me there's no good reason why I should continue to menstruate. I dislike the mood swings, the bleeding, the cramps, the weakness, the mess. Having to use pads or tampons is intimidating for me. Especially menstruating while travelling is a horror for me. I hope for a drug that lets women finally choose whether they want to menstruate or not.
(November 2000)
I would stop in a second. I think those of us that don't even want to mess with having kids later in our lives or near future would call it a blessing. I hate my time of the month. The cramps, the fatigue, are enough to send me screaming for the hills. It's all I can do to keep calm. All this for the ability to carry life when you don't want to carry life. When you know you are to selfish to care about another person.
(November 2000)
I started age 11 - I'm 27 now.
From the word go, they have been regular (never ever missed ONE) and killer painful (also I can't hold things too well, bad vision, temper goes off the scale, skin goes mad, etc., etc., and nothing - NOTHING - stops the pain. PMS? Call it what you want! ).
The only time I would plan to not have one would be for my wedding.
You must admit, periods do ruin things for women. I've never been in the situation where getting my period means attempts to start a longed-for family signals another month without success. But I know that I would HATE to see it come if it was me that was planning a family.
But really the idea is that women would have the CHOICE to not have or have periods. Whether it be a male or female idea, who cares so long as even one woman somewhere can have more control in her life if she so desires. Even if there was some wonderful (yes, I would call it wonderful) way of not having periods if you didn't want them, at least women would have the choice.
The idea that you shouldn't mess with nature is daft coming from women already on the pill or other forms of contraceptives, taking those things, getting injected or whatever, is messing with nature totally. But - it is their choice.
Feeling feminine doesn't come from having a period; women the world over will tell you that being pregnant is the most feminine feeling there is, but you need menstruation before you can get pregnant!
People deal with their periods differently; there is nothing wrong in being shy about it and not wanting the whole world to know, just like there is nothing wrong with feeling you have nothing to hide. In my view it is personal and not anyone else's business, female friends, sisters, mothers, whatever, it's personal, not their concern. Do you tell everyone when you have a bowel movement? Not likely, and that is natural too. That really is cleansing. Menstruation doesn't "cleanse the body" as is, it's the ejection of unwanted preparations made by the body for a baby. Drinking water regularly cleanses the body!
Lastly: thank God for tampons!!! I'm sure I would want to stop my periods if I had to suffer with pads!
But for now, I don't like or dislike them, they just happen and some day I'm hopeful they will stop - for pregnancy! Oh, and the wedding . . . hehehe :-)
(November 2000)
No, I wouldn't. I am 13 and have had my periods nearly a year. I like it because it so reminds me that I am a woman. However, I do think that it would have made a lot more sense for God, when he was making women, to have made us bleed to show we ARE pregnant, not to show we aren't!
(November 2000)
I don't agree with it. To be honest, there is a reason that women menstruate. Yes, I have to admit I dislike the cramps and bloating, but there is something to be said for having a week to yourself for reflection on your feelings. I find that menstruating is a monthly cleansing process that I need in order to function.
(November 2000)
I live in South Dakota (U.S.A.) and I am 24 years old. I had a baby seven months ago. I was so happy to go with out my period while pregnant.
When I was about due, though, I started to crave tampons. I would look at my box of tampons that I had not been able to touch and actually missed them.
Having your period is a pain but we bleed for a reason. To have children. Granted when you're done having kids or maybe some of you don't want kids, or can't get pregnant, it would be nice to stop having our period. The reality is we need it still. Without it you would be unbalancing the nature of your body. It plays a very important role that many fail to see. I think it is down right unhealthy to stop your period. Why do you think stress on your body stops the period? A sign that things are not well with your body. I say just live with it :) You will miss it down the road when you hit menopause.
I wouldn't stop mine for anything besides having a baby.
(November 2000)
I am a 34-year-old British mother of two. I would stop menstruating tomorrow if I could do so without any side affects like hot flushes, brittle bones, etc., that are associated with the menopause. I have put up with 23 years of intense pain when I have a period. Both my children were born by Caesarean section, and the post-operative pain was easy to cope with after the practice period pain has given me! I also have to lie sometimes when I need to leave work when the pain is getting too bad - going home with period pain is exactly the sort of girly and pathetic thing that male bosses expect you to do. I'm sick of the lying. Also, I have never felt that my reproductive organs defined me as a woman, and so I would gladly say goodbye to menstruation.
(November 2000)
It is painful, messy and makes me feel weird for a while each month BUT there is no way I would want to stop menstruating.
It is part of me that makes me physically a woman. To get rid of it would be denying this and negating the experience of being a woman.
It is also an opportunity to cleanse the body every month and I think it is a positive part of my bodily function, even when painful!
(November 2000)
I'm a 15-year-old from New Zealand. I got my period when I was 11. It was really bad because it was my first year at intermediate and it was really awkward. I didn't go swimming and I was extremely embarrassed about it. I didn't tell any of my friends until the end of intermediate.
But I know that I wouldn't stop it because I want to have kids. I am now in my second year of high school and talk openly about menstruation with friends (sometimes embarrassing them) because I know all my friends have their period and experience the same stuff as me.
But I definitely know that I wouldn't stop it no matter how annoying it gets.
(November 2000)
I remember being taunted about menstruation by one of my cousins as a young teenager. My Moon came to me when i was 11 1/2 years of age. I was always embarrassed about anyone finding out [see an ad showing this]. Fortunately, one of the texts I used in my first women's studies course had a great deal of information about menstruation in American culture, and cultures of the world. I became quite angry that ideas of "uncleanliness" and "hiding" the fact that I was menstruating were imposed upon me, and I hadn't been encouraged to celebrate this coming of age.
When I was 20 I began to celebrate my Moon by buying myself roses, burning candles, painting, writing, and other creative and spiritual expressions of love and acceptance. Now, at 24, I continue to be very open about menstruating. I have a total acceptance of my body, and I no longer buy into the archaic belief that I should be ashamed of my body's natural function and do everything possible to conceal it. My partner is one of the first people whom I tell when I begin menstruating, and he joins me in recognizing the importance and beauty of this monthly event.
Although I do have concerns for how menstruation can effect my health - increased risk of cancer - it would be the only reason I would ever consider ceasing my Moon. Otherwise, it is a part of my life in such a complete way, I can't imagine not having this amazing experience.
[At the end of her e-mail was the following:]
"Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die" - Malachy McCourt
(October 2000)
I am a 15-year-old New Zealander and have had my periods since I was 13. Though they are a monthly inconvenience I probably wouldn't stop now because I know that one day I'd like the chance to have kids. I must admit if I'd been asked this question on my first day of my very first-ever period I would have answered differently.
You see no one ever told me how MUCH they hurt! I had the worse stomach cramps at the beginning and simple Panadol didn't seem enough. What was even worse was the mess it created EVERYWHERE.
I am happy to report that they have since settled down dramatically and because I am now using tampons there isn't the same mess to look at. So to answer your question "NO," I wouldn't stop yet, at least I can be sure from your Web site that I'm not the only one who has to suffer (sometimes!).
(October 2000)
Absolutely not!!! I am offended even by the suggestion that not menstruating would be preferable.
1. I have had bad cramping with periods, but so what. As a psychology undergrad [college student], I can tell you that PMS [premenstrual syndrome] is largely a social construct, particularly the more psychological, or emotional, effects. If you are experiencing severe symptoms, for God's sake see your doctor. Ask about anti-prostaglandins. It is not normal to be in agony. Aspirin is a mild anti-prostaglandin.
2. Menstruation is a part of my spirituality as a woman. Menstruation is recognized by many spiritual groups as a time of a woman's spiritual power. I am PROUD, NOT ASHAMED to be a woman. Menstruation is still a taboo in our society: women's dirty little secret.
3. Society today has fooled us into thinking women receive equal treatment, but this is nothing short of folklore. Society pressures women to be men; what is womanly is still disregarded. Enter the sciences: stop associating sex with love. But men are not encouraged to become nurses, or to stop sleeping around. The same is true for menstruation: if it's exclusive to women, it must be bad.
4. Many women are most sexually receptive during their period, as well.
5. Furthermore, menstruation cleanses the uterus of bacteria carried into it by sperm. It is not dirty, but cleansing.
6. A final point I would like to make to those misguided and uninformed women who answer yes is that menstruation would have been bred out of humans long ago via natural selection if it did not have a benefit to it.
Why the hell would I ever not want to menstruate? Be proud of your body, of your womaness!
(October 2000)
Well, I'm on the DeproProvera shot (have been for two years now) and I LOVE not having a period!!! I always hated going and buying tampons - I'm not embarrassed, but they're so expensive! You'd think that something so vital to so many people would be a little cheaper!
Also, it's such a hassle to have blood streaming out of your body for a week or so. It's stinky and dirty and uncomfortable - plus it puts my boyfriend off of oral sex for sure!
So I'll stay on the shot for a LOOOONG time..
Twenty-year-old American girl in Berlin [Germany]
(October 2000)
Take my period . . . PLEASE! I would stop having my period right now if I could! I can't stand it! I started when I was 14, I'm now 20. I'm thinking, that's enough menstruating for me. The novelty has way past run out. I don't want kids, and things would be fine and dandy if I never had another period. Mine are never regular, and they're either really light, and last three days, or like someone has opened the floodgates and it lasts three weeks. I'm sick of it!!!!!!!!!!!
Michigan [U.S.A.] woman
(October 2000)
I am 27 and I have been menstruating since I was 14. I have only missed two periods in that time - once when I lost too much weight too quickly and once when I was under an incredible amount of stress. Other than those two times in thirteen years, I'm so regular I can set my watch my period. I generally bleed for 6 - 7 days, three of which I am a gusher of blood, 1 of which I have mild cramps.
That said, I LOVE my period. Sure it's not all fun and games, and I do wish it was just a wee but shorter, but I love the way it makes me feel in touch with my femininity. There is something in that old joke, "Don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die." The fact that women do have such an extraordinary biological process happen to them every month makes me feel both powerful and proud to be a woman.
Every time I get my period, I am reminded of the kinship I have between generations and eons of mothers, daughters, sisters, friends - and I think that is pretty cool. This is also the reason I (sometimes!) like my cramps. I know that cramps are contractions, and I know that one day I will probably give birth. So I like feeling my body do that. It makes me feel fertile and sexy and sexual - and powerful!
Because I'm so regular, I love looking at my menstrual cycle as a mirror to my life and what I go through. Since I got my first period, I've been marking the day on the calendar when I get it. This helps me make sure I'm regular and also know when to expect the next one. Earlier this year, I was AMAZED to see that the day of my period ALWAYS coincided with the new moon!! Boy, isn't THAT cool!!
I find that at the "beginning of the month" (when my period begins), I'm more active, outgoing and self-confident. I try and schedule new things for "that time of the month." The last few weeks are the "waning" period - and I like getting reflective and taking it easy at those times.
I used to feel bad because I get PMS for a few days every month - but now I've changed the way I look at it. Generally when I get depressed or sad or irritable, the things that are irritating me are REAL issues that I just haven't gotten around to dealing with. I'm generally a very positive and happy person (can you tell?), and so I value those "down" days now. I take the time to think about what's making me sad or crabby. Usually, I end up with some sort of resolution of those issues, and I think of my blood flow is those issues symbolically leaving my body.
I realize how kooky the above sounds, but learning to think about my period the way I do has made me LOVE it, seriously! So why would I want to get rid of my natural mood regulator, monthly planner and reminder of how cool it is to be a woman? No way!!!
The bottom line is that, to me, the idea of being ME without a period seems sterile. It seems unwomanly. I don't want to be a robot!! I want to bleed for SIX days and not die - AND have a bodily function that is in synch with the moon!!
So sign me up as a keeper!
- "Bloody"
(October 2000)
I keep reading here that stopping menstruation is a male fantasy. That is not altogether true. It is my fantasy as well. I have never been regular since I started at 13 (I am now 29), and when I finally do have a cycle, I pay for all the months that I haven't had one. My periods generally last for up to four and a half weeks, and they are consistently heavy to the point of distraction. And as I am an archaeologist who generally spends her summer seasons in remote villages in the Middle East and has to use whatever ditch may be handy, this does often pose a serious problem.
I would LOVE to be able to live without menstruation. I have one wonderful child and am quite satisfied with her. If I ever desire to have more children, there are plenty of children out there who would give anything to belong to a family, so who needs it?
Hello. I'm a 36-year-old Michigan woman.
I would rather menstruate than not. I had my first period at the age of 14 1/2 years old, i.e., almost 22 years ago. I was thrilled when it finally came, and continued to feel that way every month thereafter. Shortly after I turned 16, however, I went on a strict diet/exercise regimen and promptly ceased menstruating. At first, its absence was rather disconcerting, but I became used to it with time. When it finally returned with the help of DepoProvera when I was 18, however, I was pleased to have it back. Some years later I went on the Pill, and every month I would either have little or no bleeding as a result. I have been off the Pill for almost eight years now, and have pretty much bled like clockwork every 3-4 weeks. It's not all sweetness and light - I'll be the first to complain about the inconvenience of heavy bleeding and painful cramping - but once I get through those first two days I'm great!
The bottom line (no pun intended!) is that I believe that regular menstruation is a significant gauge of my overall health. As menopause is a natural phenomenon as well, I hope that I'll take it in stride when it occurs, but I can't say that I look forward to it. On the contrary, at this point in my life, I'm in no hurry for my periods to stop coming every month.
I would definitely stop menstruating if I knew that I could still become pregnant later. I am 27 and have been having periods since age 14. I feel that my "essence" as a women does not rely on the fact that I can menstruate and men can't. Women are much more special than that. To me, my femininity is in my personality and character.
I have also been diagnosed with polycystic ovarian syndrome within the last year. I do have periods fairly regularly without a lot of pain, as some of the women here have mentioned. The problem is that the ovaries act as if it they are going to ovulate, but don't and then the eggs becomes cysts.
Now that I have been diagnosed I enjoy my periods even less, because they are a constant reminder that this is yet another month in which I am not pregnant. And the months when my periods are late are even more depressing because I then begin to wonder if I may be pregnant only to inevitably wake up to the "surprise." I would gladly give up my period.
If I could stop menstruating, I would jump at the chance! I've been getting my period for almost eight years now (I started a month after I turned 11), and I've had enough of it.
I don't want to repeat much of what has already been said, but here are a few of my reasons:
1. I've read the literature, and frankly it scares me that the increased number of periods the average woman has is thought to cause the increased occurrences of ovarian cancer. I don't see children in my near future, and even then it would only be one or two AT THE MOST, so I wouldn't have those natural reprieves from menstruating.
2. Speaking of "natural," an ancient Roman writer named Soranus advocated the lack of a period. He saw them (and pregnancy) as disruptive to a woman's natural bodily functions (and boy, is it disruptive to my life!). He also pointed out the abundance of healthy non-menstruating women, and I KNOW they didn't have hormones back then to replace what a menstrual cycle produces.
3. Every three or four months, my period gets so bad on the first night that I can't sleep, and I don't even think about being able to do anything the next day. I hate having to fumble around the house trying to figure out where my mom put the hot water bottle this month; then I have to ask her, and she doesn't need to know that I'm on my period or that it just started and it's so bad I'm practically crying in my bed. I'm just thankful this doesn't happen every month, because then I would really go nuts.
4. Pads are a pain in the a**. No one in my family uses tampons or ever taught me how to use a tampon, and those stupid diagrams in the packages are no help (I am not a cross-section diagram - I don't look like that when I look at myself!). It's embarrassing to be sitting in a bathroom stall (like in my college dorm) and have someone walk in as you're making the telltale noises of pulling a pad off its paper. Why not just announce to the whole world, "I've got my period!!"
5. My period used to be really predictable; I got it right when I woke up, so I didn't have to wander around all day wondering if it started. It came every 24 days (later 28), so I could sort of plan around it. Now it comes whenever it wants to - morning or night, 27 or 29 days. Last month I got it a week early!
6. My best friend gets a second period, a light flow for two or three days between her regular periods. Tell me that's natural. I don't believe it for one second.
Those are just a few of my major reasons for not liking this thing they call a "natural process."
I'm only 15 but I love my period. It is quite amazing that I can bleed profusely without perishing. My period makes me strong. My period tells me about my health. The internal clock I possess is disrupted in the case of a tumor, stress, or vitamin deficiencies. Bleeding keeps me informed. Someday my period will tell me that I am pregnant. This is a secret that I will know first, before anyone else. Just me and my body will know. My period gives me power. I think once you become one with it you will learn how to control. I have and I know the day and the hour of when it will come and it only hurts a little for a day.
I would give up menstruating in a heartbeat, but then my periods have always been long, heavy, and painful.
I guess I'm rather lucky, looking at some of the responses here and discussions with friends; my periods aren't the excruciating nightmares so many women have described here, just occasional mild cramps and a bit of fatigue. But it's all such a bother.
The messiness, the expense and annoyance of the necessary products and cleanup - I've certainly got loads of things I'd rather spend my time and money on. I wouldn't even care if it were easily reversible, since I've never wanted children.
Perhaps if I could see a sort of silver lining in the ability to bear children, my attitude would be different - but I don't, so it's all just a dreary annoying bother to me.
All that's stopping me, really, is the lack of a magic button; 'cause much as I dislike the bother of menstruation, the expense and possible side effects of hormonal birth control don't strike me as terribly appealing either. So I guess I'll just keep grumbling and muddling along until nature takes its course. ;)
[from] just a computer geekgrrl in her early 30's in Washington, D.C.
FYI, there's a rather charming short story by award-winning SF author Connie Willis that you might want to check out, apropos this subject in general. It's a piece from 1993 or so called "And Even the Queen," which is in print currently in her paperback anthology "Impossible Things."
It's a rather funny little piece set in a very-near future where medical science has come up with that perfect reversible way to avoid all the bother, which is widely and gleefully adopted by all but some fringe groups. The female narrator's daughter, in the throes of a rebellious phase, begins flirting with such fringe movements . . . and, well, I won't spoil it for you, other than to say that her starry-eyed visions deflate pretty rapidly in the face of the messy facts. Do check it out. :)
I'm a 35-years old mother of three, and have never had painful periods, so I had no bad experience with them at all.
However, when my gynaecologist suggested the IUD [intrauterine device] "with hormones" called Minerva, which after about six months suppresses the periods, I didn't doubt a moment. I've been "wearing" this IUD since December '98 now, occasionally bleed very little (that's the only inconvenience, you can never tell when, but then, it's so very very little, that having just a small protective pad in my bag is always enough) and I am perfectly happy. Indeed: no more carrying around of full bags of tampons, however practical they are, and I feel just as much a woman as before. It just surprises me not to read any comment about this IUD in any of the letters.
I started menstruating when I was eleven-years-and-one-month old and I am now twenty-two. As I've got older (I'm not writing myself off as being over the hill at 22, but how else do you describe it?) cramps have gotten so much worse, it's now to the point where the pain is that bad that I'm nearly doubling over in pain. I have medication to take if need be but I have trouble swallowing pills so I normally see if I can go without it.
Yes, I definitely wouldn't miss extra washing, the expense of menstruation products (pads/tampons), and the ick feeling I normally experience whilst having my period. It would be one less excuse that I could use to my partner when he wants to have sex (not that it always stops us), but I'm sure I could handle that. I've used the Pill as contraception and just loved the fact that I could pick and choose when I wanted my period to start. I tried not to delay it too many months as I could sometimes get break-through bleeding. I don't know how many brands of the Pill I've been on to help reduce the amount of bleeding and cramping; I've had very heavy periods since day one. I've considered having the injection [DepoProvera] but I've heard some quite evil things about it and as I'm hoping to have children one day I'd rather not risk it. I live in New Zealand.
I wouldn't stop menstruating if I could. I'm 20 years old and I've been having my periods since I was 11. When I was younger I would have said yes, but now I feel I'm used to it, I've accepted it as part of my life.
To be completely honest, I don't think it's sacred, neither does it make me feel like a woman. To me it's just another body function. I don't like going to the bathroom either, but I won't stop going because I don't like it.
I'm an archaeology student. Because of the nature of the job I have to spend lots of time outdoors and to have my period while I'm doing fieldwork is not a pleasant experience.
I just don't like hormones. I've never taken anticonceptives and, if I can help it, I never will. They feel artificial, and since I'm not very active, sexually speaking, I don't see the need of taking the Pill.
I don't suffer from PMS. Maybe that's why I don't care about menstruating; it hurts the first day, then I forget about it. My cycle is not completely regular, but I don't care much. Who said it "has" to be perfectly regular?
In reply to your question would I put off periods (menstruating) for as long as I wanted and was able to start back up when I wanted children? Well, yes please. I started menstruating when I was eleven years and one month old and I am now twenty two. As I've got older (I'm not writing myself off as being over the hill at 22, but how else do you describe it) cramps have gotten so much worse, it's now to the point where the pain is that bad that I'm nearly doubling over in pain. I have medication to take if need be but I have trouble swallowing pills so I normally see if I can go without it.
Yes, I definitely wouldn't miss extra washing, the expense of menstruation products (pads/tampons), and the ick feeling I normally experience whilst having my period. It would be one less excuse that I could use to my partner when he wants to have sex (not that it always stops us), but I'm sure I could handle that. I've used the pill as contraception and just loved the fact that I could pick and choose when I wanted my period to start. I tried not to delay it too many months as I could sometimes get break through bleeding. I don't know how many brands of the Pill I've been on to help reduce the amount of bleeding and cramping, I've had very heavy periods since day one. I've considered having the injection but I've heard some quite evil things about it and as I'm hoping to have children one day I'd rather not risk it.
Hi,
Can you stand another letter in the stopping menstruation debate? [Sure!]
I am a 43-year-old woman who had a hysterectomy at the end of July. I had huge fibroid tumors which not only caused heavy bleeding, but I also had serious anemia, and the fibroids pushed on some of my other organs.
So the uterus had to go, and along with it, the monthly periods. I don't miss them a bit. Since age nine, I had to deal with bad cramps three to five of the seven to 10 days my period lasted, as well as major bleeding. For years, I could be counted on to pass out at least once or twice each period. And PMS from hell, too.
Since I still have ovaries, I still have PMS, and I still need to warn people that I may not always be able to control what I say at that time. But at least I don't have the cramps or the anemia any more. And I sure don't miss running to the restroom, trying to beat the flow, not to mention wearing two tampons and a pad!
I admire the women who can embrace their periods whole-heartedly, and sympathize with those who cannot, regardless of the reason. But I feel no less connected to the natural rhythm of womanhood because I don't bleed monthly. (If my ovaries were taken, I might have felt differently.)
I'm not a mother, nor did I ever have a desire to become one. I'm sure that made a difference in my feelings, too.
Circumstances made it possible for me to no longer have periods; so far, no regrets.
Omaha, Nebraska
P.S.: I keep your site bookmarked and have done so almost since I first went on-line almost two years ago... Great site! Very informative, and also fun! [Thanks!]
I understand it can suck, and it is messy, expensive and can be quite uncomfortable. But come on, women, it's what makes us stand apart from the men. Our bodies have been designed this way during the course of hundreds of thousands of years for specific reasons and to mess with Mother Nature is inviting trouble. Instead of bowing to the man and buying in to their flimsy excuses of why women should stop menstruating, stand tall and proud because menstruating is what makes us the life bearers that we are. To agree with the men that we should take a pill to stop this powerful gift is the same as defecting to the other side. [I'M] 30, female and lovin' it!!
I'd been on DepoProvera for over two years. Then I decided to quit.
When I got my first period I was disgusted. It was very uncomfortable getting used to feminine products again, especially when I knew that I didn't have to have my period at all. Having to go to the washroom every couple of hours to change, making sure that when I went out I had to enough supplies to last the day . . . . To say it was a hassle is an understatement. I started Depo again afterwards.
The entire process is primitive. After all, rape and murder are part of primitive man but I don't see people supporting that idea. We've moved beyond that primal instinct. Menstruation may be a uniquely female experience but it is also another aspect of existence that is obsolete.
When you get right down to it, not having your period is more economically and environmentally friendly than having one.
For those who are against this, I suggest going on Depo for 6 months (in the first month you still get your period) and then stop.
I find the arguments against this very repetitive, especially when you don't have first hand experience. Afterwards, you can argue this debate with experience on both sides of the spectrum.
I am almost 27 years old, and have had my cycle since age 10. Although this is suppose to be a joyous part of womanhood, I have not enjoyed a moment of it yet.
I have had to deal with excruciating cramps for the last 16 years. The only relief I had was around age 22 or 23 when my cramps weren't so bad, but the bleeding was heavy. I decided to start taking Ortho-Novum 777 in June 2000. My periods are now regulated, but the cramps are worse and I am clotting.
If I had a chance to stop it today, this minute, this very second, I would, and would not think twice about it. As far as children are concerned, I do believe in adoption. So, to all the women who enjoy this monthly inconvenience, you are much better women than I.
I can't say that I want to stop menstruating unless I actually go through menopause. I'm pretty close to that point anyway; another ten years and I'll be going through hormonal horror. I'll be curious to see how it will affect me.
I know, many of my mother's friends have chosen to restart their periods with hormones. That seems a little odd, but I certainly don't know how I'll feel at that point. On the other hand, my mother-in-law had her uterus removed so she wouldn't have to worry about menstruation again. I think that's really going too far.
I doubt I'll take any sort of pill to limit my menses though. I'm not one to take hormones unless I'm sure they will be more of a benefit than a problem. So far, the people I know who take hormones have been way more emotional than they were before.
I started at age 10, so I've been through at least 35 years times 12 months, minus seven months when I was pregnant and even nursing restarted pretty early afterwards. So that makes it about 413 periods too many!! Plus for about the last 25 years I have had to use a hand grenade and a 2x4. What a pain in the behind and pocketbook. So when my menopause begins, I'll start partying!
No way. My body will do it when it is good and ready, I trust my body to do what it needs! I just started my Moon again today [2 October 2000]. I welcome its arrival because I know it is necessary. I am cycling with the planets, with the universe, with the Moon. I find it absolutely terrifying that womyn would want to take some drug - such as DepoProvera - to stop their periods. If we didn't need them we wouldn't have them.
Millions of years of menstruating females is not a mistake. Stopping our periods can only have serious repercussions.
I live in the United States and, unfortunately, the media has really turned females against their natural cycles. It is time for womyn to reclaim menstruation as sacred and honor our bodies as they cycle!
Oh, sure, really! But . . . .
Who needs such an uncomfortable thing as menstruation? But it's the way nature just works.
So, it's ok to take it as a natural thing - a womanly thing - (accepting it the best you can and positively, if there is nothing you can do) and I'm not personally one of those that can complain the most as I'm lucky enough to bleed quite scantly and quite controlled. It even seems to sleep at night with me (a psychological switch, I was told by the gynecologist when I was worried), though I do suffer the pains, particularly when I'm not in the mood.
Now, my "but," which is that I would only dare to try to manipulate my nature if I know FOR SURE that I'm really in control of it, so that it's not going to bring me another problem that I may not want.
Still it's an option, and options themselves are sometimes really good for some people, and just not for others.
So, my decision would be if it really, really bothers me and makes my life difficult in too many ways, and I just don't want this thing assuming the risks, I believe it's good having a solution known and available.
But if it doesn't feel necessary, I wouldn't easily risk I know that. I'm not personally even on the current pills.
Every 28 days I wish I hadn't menstruation. The premenstrual syndrome is horrible for me: I can't swim or play tennis, I have to stay in bed a lot of time because of the pain. But living without it would be bizarre. I think it would be unnatural, and maybe women would have health problems.
I have had pain from my very first period when I was 13 (I am 38 now) and a week before I have "symptoms" and it takes me another week to recover from the kind of exhaustedness it leaves behind, not to mention the mess and that I am really ill. If it wasn't for the painkillers I take, I would have to stay in bed and still, sometimes I drag myself to work (sense of duty, you know) and back to the sofa where I lie wrapped in a blanket waiting for the pain to go away. And, of course, I have to avoid going out, traveling and so on those days. I simply hate it! And I find it primitive!
I got the shock of my life when my gynecologist told me, talking about the Pill, that in fact it was possible just to continue taking it and not have the period, but "because women prefer" to have their periods, it was made in such a way that women took the pill for three weeks and then menstruated. I couldn't believe my ears and wondered which women had said that!
[Actually, according to an article in the New Yorker magazine, one of the men who developed it, an American Catholic, packaged it that way to please the Catholic Church; but the Church rejected it anyway. The man, Dr. John Rock, left the Church and apparently even religion, dying a disillusioned man.]
I started at age 10, so I've been through at least 35 years times 12 months, minus 7 months when I was pregnant and even nursing restarted pretty early afterwards. So that makes it about 413 periods too many!! Plus, for about the last 25 years I have had to use a hand grenade and a 2x4. What a pain in the behind and pocketbook. So when my menopause begins, I'll start partying!
What kind of whacko would want blood, cramps, PMS, and depression every month for most of her life? Well, maybe if she owned a tampon factory. . . .
NEVER!!! as cheesy as it sounds, it is a thing primeval, I love the vitality and the power I feel during my period, even when I'm tired. It separates us from the rest, we are alive and tapped into each other when we menstruate. I have given birth to four children, and I consider menstruating a powerful, positive event, cleansing, and wonderful.
I am not a hippie, or a New-Age touchy feely, just a 36-year-old woman, grateful that there are some things that men can't take away from us. This whole cessation of menstruation is a male fantasy.
Men have tried for centuries to control us reproductively, and this is one thing they can't have. Don't kid yourselves, girls, if it's all about making menstruation convenient and not messy for men - I say, Step aside, boys, and let the real men through, ones that honor and respect our bodies for the powerful, life-affirming machines that they are.
Stop menstruating? What next? Will we go back to chastity belts and burning women at the stake? Give me a break.