"Down with the feminine hygiene aisle!"
I most certainly would dispense with menstruation and for the most part
I have. I have polycystic ovary syndrome which makes my periods unpredictable
last year I went 4 months without a period and when they resumed it was
a regular bloodbath. I finally got fed up and my very understanding gynecologist
put me on progesterone which gives me a very light flow a few days every
month. Hallelujah!! Who needs to put up with getting a fucking period?
I am not into this new age woman crap, proud to have a moon time of the
month or whatever they want to call it.
Give me freedom any day. Down with the feminine hygiene aisle!
July 2007
"I have had one since I was 7 and I am now 30. To me it can be
a pain but in actuality it is apart of life."
Hi, I actually don't mind my period. I have had one since I was 7 and
I am now 30. To me it can be a pain but in actuality it is apart of life.
I just remember that yes, this too shall pass, it is just one of life's
obstacles and I wouldn't change it if I could. I bleed for about 6-7 days
and have bad cramps for 3 days. The way I look at it if it wasn't for me
then God wouldn't have given it to me. Remember, ladies, that no matter
what it is a part of you. While you may be cranky or upset it is apart
of you and defines who you are!!!
****
July 2007
"I wish I hadn't wished for it in the first place, because for
the year I've had it it had made me miserable."
I am 13 and I would definitely stop menstruating. Periods are my hell
once a month. I feel gross and self-conscious - it's like I am contaminated.
I always worry about it getting on my underwear or staining my clothes.
When I get on in front of the class I constantly check my butt turning
around. I feel like the whole world knows about it.
I never feel special or proud during my period, I feel like staying
home all week and lying in bed until the "thing" has passed.
My period seems abnormally long - sometimes 9 days - it is abnormally long.
I wish I hadn't wished for it in the first place, because for the year
I've had it it had made me miserable.
I would not hesitate to give up my period-assuming I could still have
kids someday far from now. It is not a part of myself I am proud of, it
is a part of me I could live without; and I would happily do so. Just because
I am a woman doesn't mean I should be punished for it.
That is how I feel.
July 2007
"There are significant risks to the hormone therapy many women
use during menopause. Why would it be any different during our fertile years?"
No. Our bodies were created to go through this cycle during our fertile
years, and any drug or hormone therapy that blocks it must increase other
health risks. I have enjoyed not having my period for the past 2 years
due to pregnancy and exclusive nursing, but I would use a birth control
method that eliminated or reduced the frequency of my period. The negative
effects of doing so would likely be long-term in nature, and therefore
initial safety tests would not satisfy me.
There are significant risks to the hormone therapy many women use during
menopause. Why would it be any different during our fertile years?
June 2007
"I won't shed a tear when the periods stop. Would I stop
them now? Huge YES, if it was healthy & safe to do so."
I know menstruation is natural but then so is death and flatulence
and who welcomes them! I can feel feminine and proud to be a woman
without bloody knickers and fear of leaks or coming on unexpectedly. I
want to be able to book holidays without thinking about my irregular cycle,
only to find that it gets delayed or starts early and ruins my holiday.
And for those of you who can't equate periods with ruined holidays, you
try finding suitable toilets in foreign countries or try changing tampons
in a 'Turkish' loo (the squat ones with the footprints) and then find there's
nowhere to wash your hands!
It would be nice to be free to do want you want, when you want without
thinking first whether you will need a loo and calculating how many hours
before you will need a new tampon, then worrying as the time draws near
that it will leak before you have a chance to change it.
I am 48, I started my periods when I was 11 and they have been irregular,
and therefore been difficult to plan around, ever since. At first
I had a lot of pain, cramps etc which made me (on doctors advice) a chronic
paracetamol taker. After a couple of years on the Pill (blessed relief,
I had just 3 days/month of painless bleeding, and then only light) I found
that the pains were less severe and I only need painkillers once every
six months or so. But the periods were back to irregular.
But I hate being held hostage each month. I don't look forward
to the menopause (hot flushes? pleeease!) but I won't shed a tear when
the periods stop. Would I stop them now? Huge YES, if it was
healthy & safe to do so.
And a huge THANK YOU for such an informative website!
June 2007
"I would not want to stop menstruation, it is a womanly right,
it is a way a woman experiences her most powerful time."
Hi, I was talking to my partner about this just this morning. I
would not want to stop menstruation, it is a womanly right, it is a way
a woman experiences her most powerful time. Native American Woman
and other tribal societies still gather together during moontime (menstruation)
and during this time gather intuitive wisdom and guidance for the whole
tribe. Menstruating is a powerful experience when we have problems
with menstruation we have a fear of our own power and femininity. I used
to have really painful periods I began using natural progesterone cream
on my skin and I have peaceful periods now, little PMT and its an honour
to menstruate. I feel women are given sanitary protection like pads
and tampons and for me it always has felt really disgusting like I am disposing
of my blood like it is used waste and faeces. Tribal women sometimes
allow the blood to seep into the earth and this makes our connection with
Mother Earth stronger. I am considering buying a Mooncup soon myself
instead of using pads.
I know of some women who want to stop their periods and most of us have
been told it is a curse, mainly by religion and man. It's a beautiful
experience that women need educating on, not just the biology of the experience
but also the femininity and power held within it. This drug is
just another way the pharmaceutical companies are using to dumb down
the feminine, when women take this drug in the long term they will be reliant
on other drugs because no doubt this will have tremendous health side effects
like most drugs supplied by the pharmaceutical agencies like the contraceptive
pill. Men know their is power in women who menstruate, I have my most
emotional, intuitive times during my period, this is why men and society
for so long have tried to stop us having periods.
These are my thoughts anyway,
Thanks for listening,
****, United Kingdom
June 2007
"Now my periods are winding down and I'm so looking forward to
them stopping forever. I'm looking forward to being a granny (and not just
a granny midwife). I have to agree with the lady who said 'Not just yes,
but hell yes.'"
I am a midwife, 44, have three beautiful children (23, 19, 17) and I
got my period when I was 12, like my mother. I was thrilled.
I really enjoyed maternity, nursing and all that. I used sponges or
home-made cloth pads and a home-made belt for years when I worked from
home. Never had too bad menstrual pain, but had awful childbirths. Now
my periods are winding down and I'm so looking forward to them stopping
forever. I'm looking forward to being a granny (and not just a granny midwife).
I have to agree with the lady who said "Not just yes, but hell yes.
Never really had a problem or anything but after 35 years I'm sick and
tired of it. I've appreciated the feminine, the moon cycles, the fecundity,
the fertility. It's awesome, . . . now go away, shoo. "
Amen.
Bless you all for your brave stories.
May 2007
"My dad is a doctor, but he doesn't say anything; my mom says
'it's normal' too, so I don't go 'to the doctor' when I have those pains."
Yes, I would stop it but only if there were less dangerous ways, something
like surgery or magic (!) (without drastic or long-term side effects),
whateva. I prefer to reduce the periods or the flow.
I am 16 years old from Mexico. In my short life I'm tired of menstruation.
I have very painful cramps, and my period is very heavy. I feel dizzy,
horrible, vomiting (just like a 20-year-old woman from England who commented).
My life stops one or two painful days; the first day I can't do anything,
it bothers me a lot, I'm just waiting for it to end. Actually, I was thinking
"it's normal," but reading the comments I find it may be a disorder.
My dad is a doctor, but he doesn't say anything; my mom says "it's
normal" too, so I don't go "to the doctor" when I have those
pains.
I like to be a woman and I'm very proud, I like my body, but I hate
to use pads or Tampax, and the pre-menstrual mood changes (I had enough
when I started to cry for a shampoo tv commercial). I don't want to have
children, so why do I need to have these periods? Bleeding each month...
why ?... what can I do at this age? Nothing. I just will try to handle
it a few years more, but I don't want to wait till menopause.
Anyway...
Thanks for this web site. I'm very curious about this topic, the history
of menstruation.
May 2007
"Every day after school I would pore over returned search results
from Google for 'menstruation' and the like. MUM.org was also
a big hit with me. (I really admire you and the effort you have
put into your site!) I always deleted the computer's history; the
searches were getting to be a secret obsession."
Two years ago at menarche, I never ever wanted to stop menstruating.
At first I pitied myself for being female, for being subjected to messy
puddles and monthly tampon fees. I kept it to myself for seven months
until my ma found out. Her questions were ignored until she stopped asking
me. By this time I'd already found your site and had already begun admiring
menstrual activists. I decided to become more eco-friendly, and began to
buy organic tampons. Every day after school I would pore over returned
search results from Google for "menstruation" and the like.
MUM.com was also a big hit with me.(I really admire you and the
effort you have put into your site!) I always deleted the computer's
history; the searches were getting to be a secret obsession. Then
I discovered menstrual cups, and became more open to my ma about
my periods. Two months later I had convinced her to buy me a Divacup off
the Internet. I had a serious attachment to this thing: I sewed lots of
little cases for it and sterilized it like nuts. I saved the blood, painted
with it, and even went so far as to asking artists if they wanted
to buy some (they didn't). Meanwhile I had become involved in vegetarianism,
biking, swimming, and running. Needless to say, I dropped ten pounds in
six months and haven't menstruated in five. I miss my period terribly. For
weeks I eat gigantic amounts of food, but it still refuses
to appear. I hope I will see it later in life. So I say no, I would
not stop menstruating if I could.
Thanks very much,
A twelve-year-old kid, New York
May 2007
"I'm sure that if men had to deal with something so undesirable
for just 3 months, then there would definitely be a miracle pill to stop
this madness immediately!"
Yes, I would definitely stop menstruation if I could.
My menstruation is heavy, occurs 2 times monthly (10 days on,
5 days off and 10 days on with 5 days off) and is disruptive to my life.
I am 34 years old, married with one 10-year old son and my tubes have
been tied for 7 years.
There is no reason for me to menstruate. It is simply an inconvenience.
The unpleasantness, high expense and the interruption during work, not
to mention the numerous embarrassing moments are something I can definitely
live without.
I'm sure that if men had to deal with something so undesirable for just
3 months, then there would definitely be a miracle pill to stop this madness
immediately!
May 2007
"If you are unhappy with the products you use then you should
look into the many other options out there. You might just feel a bit better
physically and mentally."
I'm a 16-year-old female from the United States. I would not stop menstruating
if I could. I can't really explain why, but I look forward to getting my
period every month. I love getting out and using my soft, comfortable,
absorbent cloth pads. The blood is diluted and pink as I rinse it away.
I can't forget my menstrual cup, I love that too. It's natural and not
an inconvenience to me. I still get PMS and mild cramps but I take the
time to pamper my body before AND after my period, now. I feel refreshed.
If you are unhappy with the products you use then you should look into
the many other options out there. You might just feel a bit better physically
and mentally.
May 2007
"As much as I dislike going through mine, I would rather keep
it, than suffer some unknown health issues women wanting to cease
their cycles may face."
I don't really like the bloating, moodiness, body aches and mess of
my cycle but I do think that it could possibly be harmful if artificially
stopped somehow, especially with chemicals or medicines.
I read where women that are post menopausal tend to wind up with
an increased risk for heart problems so I think that stopping a menstrual
cycle might be just as dangerous.
As much as I dislike going through mine, I would rather keep it, than
suffer some unknown health issues women wanting to cease their
cycles may face.
Being on the "rag" as me and my school friends referred
to it in back in the 70's was and still is a bother but it is also
a nice break from men.
Love your site! Very unique!
Signed,
A Lady in Texas
April 2007
"And it's kind of disgusting, but I kind of like
wearing pads during the school day or whatever. It's kind of squishy and
it's actually a little bit comfy, like a little cushion."
Hello. I'm a 14-year-old girl from New Jersey (U.S.A.). I really love
your site! If you post this on there, I would like to mention that [the
book] "The Red Tent" might be of interest to your readers, please
and thank you.
Anyways, I think it's just kind of stupid to want to get rid of your
period. I know some people have really bad cramps or they don't want to
have children or whatever, but it really isn't that much of a bother to
ME. I don't get (bad) cramps, and I'm actually kind of HAPPIER during my
period. Sides, once I get it it's kind of a relief, because then I don't
have to worry about getting it Next Week when I'm going on a field trip
or to the movies with my friends or whatever else. And if my period DOES
fall on the date of some event or another, I use a tampon. And it's kind
of disgusting, but I kind of like wearing pads during the school day or
whatever. It's kind of squishy and it's actually a little bit comfy, like
a little cushion. My least favorite part of my period has got to be the
last 2 days or so, when I'll think it's over and it'll stop for a whole
day and then the next day I'm on the rag again.
I hope you found my email of some interest, I'm just giving a little
back to you from all of the info. I got from your site!
Love,
Xxxxx (Since I know you X out the names anyways)
April 2007
"What I noticed was that American women are extremely conscious
about their body and easily embarrassed by the most natural things. American
women couldn't even imagine not shaving their armpits . . . .
Did it ever occur to someone that being a little bit (just a little
bit) dirty is actually attractive because that's just what life is
like?"
I would definitely not take any pills to suppress menstruation permanently.
I do feel for those women who really suffer physically from menstrual cramps
and I can understand that they'd take such a pill. However, I can't
relate to all those who'd just like to get rid of it because it's a nuisance
or causes a little bit of pain.
I am 28, a German married to an American (living in Germany). I earn
my living by translating medical research studies from German into English.
I think my work has made me more aware of the dangers that lie in new medical
products and as there are no long-term data available on the permanent
suppression of menstruation, I wouldn't take the risk. However, even
if there were enough clinical long-term data that would prove that it's
safe, why should I take it? Menstruation is not a disease. Why should I
swallow a pill to suppress something that is just a normal body function?
I am not sure if this website is mainly visited by American women, but
in any case, I have the feeling that this is a very American idea.
Due to my work as a translator and because of my husband, I have
lived in the US for a while and have got to know many American men and
women. What I noticed was that American women are extremely conscious about
their body and easily embarrassed by the most natural things. American
women couldn't even imagine not shaving their armpits - "Oh
my god, how disgusting!" But why is it disgusting? Men have hairy
armpits and it's fine. Why is a woman with hairy armpits disgusting? My husband
told me that he had never before seen women with hairy armpits until he
came to Europe! Unbelievable! Same goes for shaving legs (I only shave
my legs in summer when I wear skirts. In Winter I don't care.). Same goes
for body odour. Same goes for BM. Same goes for showing nudity
on tv and in newspapers. And this whole discussion about stopping the disgusting
business of menstruation is just the same. People get estranged from their
own body and think it's disgusting if their body isn't 100% clean and fresh.
Did it ever occur to someone that being a little bit (just a little
bit) dirty is actually attractive because that's just what life is
like?
I think women should just get a more normal attitude towards their own
body and be more relaxed (unless they have real pain. Once again, I feel
for these women and understand their point of view.) I mean, i am not particularly
happy about getting my period but i just accept it as a normal part of
me just like my big butt or my beautiful eyes. When I have my period
I pretty much do everything I usually do even though I don't feel
that great all the time, but I refuse to fuss about it constantly. I
even have sex during that time and that always makes me feel better. :)
Disgusting? Well, I don't care. It's not to me and it's not
disgusting to my husband. It's just the normal me. You can say
what you want but i have the feeling it's a lot more fun the way I do it
instead of fussing about my period for a week, not going anywhere, feeling
dirty and disgusting and pushing my husband out of bed. By the way,
my husband thinks I am much more easygoing, sexier and less tense than
any American woman he ever met. Coincidence or cultural difference? I don't
know. I am just telling you how weird Americans seem to me at times.
April 2007
"I am done with having kids. I am ready to be done with having
periods. . . . I have been asking how I can speed up the menopause process
just so I can stop this monthly cycle."
I got to this website in search of ways to stop my periods! I've been
having periods since I was 9 years old. I have never had a regular every
28 days period, without high dose estrogen birth control. High school was
a time of being out of school several days during each period due to heavy
cramping and bleeding. Having children did not help (I was one of the few
to continue to have migraines while pregnant). I am done with having kids.
I am ready to be done with having periods.
I am 44 and for the last two years have had extremely uncontrollable
periods. I have two - three days a month I can't leave the house. I have
missed special family events and business functions because of this. My
doctor mentioned a surgical procedure a number of months ago, but thought
I should try birth-control pills again. They haven't done anything to help
me and I have had it. I have been asking how I can speed up the menopause
process just so I can stop this monthly cycle.
[I just received this e-mail that might help:
Dear Sir/Madam,
In the process of researching websites related to menorrhagia and its
treatment options, we visited your website. As your website provides vast
information on menorrhagia-related topics, we ask that you please consider
adding a link to our website http://www.aboutheavyperiods.com.
Thank you for your consideration
Jon Holato]
March 2007
"For 2.5 weeks of the month I am miserable. . . . Since I am
unable [to have children], I would like this mess to stop."
Absolutely! I am 30 with four children. I would love to have
more children (three of mine are adopted - age 8, 4 and 2, and my birth
child just turned 11.) My husband and I, however, are infertile for
unknown reasons.
For 2.5 weeks of the month I am miserable. First with PMS that
makes me angry at everyone, then with my period which makes me very uncomfortable. I
don't want to go anywhere, and I hate people for this time. I feel
good for a week and a half, and then it begins all over again.
If I could get pregnant, I would put up with this for that. Since
I am unable, I would like this mess to stop. Maybe it makes other
women feel normal. It did for me for the first few months when I was
14. Now it is more that I come to it each month with a hateful unbelieving
thought - "this can't be real!"
I have been against birth control pills - wanted to have my family naturally. Then,
to satisfy my son's birth dad, I went on Depo-Provera soon after he was
born. I bled for a year straight - and believe this may be the cause of
my current infertility. But since I can't have children, I would take
birth control to get rid of my period. (I have heard that infertility
may be reversed by being without a period for a length of time, and I would
really like to try that.)
So, my answer is yes. I would definitely stop it if I could.
March 2007
"I even asked the vet if I could be spayed along with the cat.
He just laughed. He thought I was kidding."
It's nice to know I'm not alone. I'm 47 and haven't had to deal with
menstruation for 10 years. But, I've been on Depo[-Provera] since 1997.
My doc is now concerned and wanting me off the depo for my bones. That
is probably a good idea, but I don't want the monthly mess of a curse back.
It always would last for two weeks of the month. I can't plan to do anything. [Read about shortening
periods with artificial light.]
I'm interested in other forms of suppression since they refuse to give
me an elective hysterectomy. Nor will they offer me endometrial ablation.
Yeah, I'm healthy and never had real cramps. Just super heavy bleeding.
I would love something permanent. Any suggestions from potential
experts out there who have had success??? I even asked the vet if I could
be spayed along with the cat. He just laughed. He thought I was kidding.
March 2007
Depo-Provera not working
I'm on Depo[-Provera] and my periods are now worse!!! The last one lasted
over three months and this happened one month after I got my shot. I'm
a lesbian and only tried this to end THE MISERY!! Anything else to take
care of it?? [Read about shortening
periods with artificial light.]
March 2007
"There is no way to stop them without fooling around with my
hormones and as far as I know they are pretty important to my health."
I'm 45, living in Canada.
If I could stop them without any side effects, I would.
That is the problem. There is no way to stop them without fooling around
with my hormones and as far as I know they are pretty important to my health.
And surgery is out for me. Too risky. So essentially-No.
I've got 5 years, give or take until menopause and then I will become
one of those older wiser women one hears so much about.
March 2007
"I have always believed that woman are 'higher beings' in some
ways because we have children and get to wear divine dresses!!"
My name is *****, I am 13 (almost 14) and I started my period when I
was 12. When I first started my period, I was in the pool and I only saw
some brown drops in the bottom of my togs. I showed them to mum and she
said she loved me and I wasn't a little girl anymore, and gave me a BIG
hug!!
I must admit that I HATE period pains, which I sometimes get, but I
always feel blessed when 'it's that time of the month.' I love the feel
of being a woman, and I adore the idea that my body is preparing myself
to have children. I do also like that I am growing up and I think it makes
me really happy and proud to be a woman!! I have always believed that woman
are 'higher beings' in some ways because we have children and get to wear
divine dresses!! When I get pain I have a panadol and go on this site...
It makes me happy to see all these wonderful woman bonding with each other
over a beautiful thing!!
That's all from me!!
*****, NZ
February 2007
"I plan to meet with a doctor soon to get my prescription changed
to Seasonale or something of that sort, and I encourage other women in my
situation who feel helpless to do the same. :)"
I'm an 18-year-old girl from Texas, and I've dealt with severe endometriosis
since I was about 16 1/2. The pain I experienced for two months was so
severe that I can't even fathom any words to describe it -- and then I
was fortunate enough to be able to get on the Pill. Most of my monthly
pain was completely alleviated, at least for the first year or so. I still
do have worse cramps than most women I know experience, and the combination
of that with my IBS (which was made worse with the coming of womanhood)
results in horrible intestinal pain. I didn't think there was much that
I could do about that regarding hormone supplementation, but a few months
ago, I started reading that many women had been using contraceptive pills
continuously to avert their periods. I tried it, and the results were amazing
for me! I felt much better without the pain and also noticed a significant
increase in the fullness of my breasts (but considering that I'm only a
AA cup, it doesn't take much to be considered "significant" :).
I plan to meet with a doctor soon to get my prescription changed to Seasonale
or something of that sort, and I encourage other women in my situation
who feel helpless to do the same. :)
February 2007
"God, just no more ANYTHING that has to do with blood!"
Your site is fab - don't let the naysayers get you down!!!
I never really loved or hated my period - it was just a part of my life,
for better or worse. I gave birth to two lovely children (now aged 10 and
6). I decided after my second was born that I wasn't going to stick those
damn hormones into my body anymore - that it wasn't natural, or normal,
and that's not the way it was supposed to be. I had a bad experience with
a "chemical abortion", and realized that something needed to
be done. My doctor offered me the Mirena IUD, with the caveat that "you
might stop having periods!" Well, hell, I thought, is that a BAD thing?!?
Would it really be so AWFUL? She told me that her Russian patients often
came back after a few months to have it removed, saying that "they
didn't feel like women" without their periods. BAH! I thought. To
never have to deal with a bloody tampon again, now that would be a relief.
I signed up for the Mirena, and although it took about 6 weeks or so before
my uterus stopped complaining, I've had it now for 4 years and love it.
God, just no more ANYTHING that has to do with blood!
that's my story :)
January 2007
"Even with all this, I always welcome my period, it feels like
such a cleanse every month. Plus it sure makes me appreciate being
pain-free and mobile again when it's all over."
Hi there,
Just thought I'd share my story. I've got a bicornuate uterus (you
can compare it to a normal uterus or research it more on google)
[so does one of the MUM artists; scroll down toward the bottom
of the page to see her doctor's drawing]. Plus I have a double-lined
uterus with each lining twice the thickness of a regular lining. So,
I was told that with the double linings I might start having two periods
per month at some point. Well, I don't know which is better, two periods
per month or one KILLER once a month! Currently I suffer from one
HELL of a period once a month. I wonder if the people who have 'heavy'
periods could even compare to this. Because of the two double-thick
linings, it's like having four times the amount of a regular person. It
sucks, but what I do is as soon as I see or feel a hint of my period coming,
I load up on Ibuprofen, which lessens the pain. Heating pad helps,
walking, sleeping, plus I have a very loving husband, who massages my lower
back gently, because it's so very sensitive. I was on the Pill for
10 years and decided that was enough. The Pill also made the
pain a bit more bearable, plus my periods were lighter, but I don't know
if anything out there is strong enough to eliminate all the pain. I
guess I was lucky to be a VERY late bloomer. I didn't start till I
was 17. I remember being so upset because my younger sisters had theirs
and I didn't. I guess my body knew I wouldn't be able to handle the
pain at a younger age. Even with all this, I always welcome my period,
it feels like such a cleanse every month. Plus it sure makes me appreciate
being pain-free and mobile again when it's all over. It's kinda like
my monthly reminder to enjoy life as much as possible whenever you can!
I'm 32, no children, even though everyone's told me to have a child
and it would fix it. I've been told by my doctor that I would have
a very difficult time getting pregnant because of the bicornuate uterus,
plus I have one severely damaged ovary from a cyst that burst. So I decided
children weren't for me. So instead I run a daycare centre! Much
more fun, plus I get paid for it!
January 2007
"I was born to be a reptile . . . ."
I don't care about annoying, painful menstrual cycles. I was born to
be a reptile, not a mammal. I have no intentions of breeding, and I have
an active life-style - periods are a filthy curse. But of course I'd put
great importance to the risks of any pill that offers this solution.
January 2007
"First of all, as a registered nurse, let me say that I think
women should be able to do whatever they want with their periods."
I found this site while I was doing research for grad school (I am getting
a master's degree in Adult Health Nursing) and I find it fascinating.
I am 30 years old, married, no kids. Probably won't have kids as
my husband and I are infertile for unknown reasons.
I got my period when I was 12 and a half years old, which I guess is
pretty average. I am fairly regular with most cycles being from 28-31
days, with 5-6 days of bleeding.
First of all, as a registered nurse, let me say that I think women should
be able to do whatever they want with their periods. If they have
a lot of pain, anemia, or other problems and want medications to regulate,
stop, or decrease the frequency of their periods, I fully support that.
I myself took oral contraceptives for six years and eventually went
off them because they gave me difficult-to-control high blood pressure. Some
women are just more sensitive to extra hormones than others.
I noticed when I went off the Pills, though, that I felt better. I was
less bloated and tired. Even if the high blood pressure were not
an issue, I will never take hormonal contraceptives again because I feel
better without them.
My periods aren't easy or pleasant either. I bleed very heavily
the first 2-3 days, and have cramps and nausea. But I just take ibuprofen
regularly, change my protection often, and get through it. After the
first three days or so, I actually feel pretty good again. I try to
distract myself during the bad time, but just doing what I would normally
do. I do the same thing when I have a mild illness.
So, no I would not stop my periods. I have mixed feelings about
them, but I feel more "normal" when I have them.
- 30-year-old American, raised in the northeast.
December 2006
"I've appreciated the feminine, the moon cycles, the fecundity,
the fertility. It's awesome, . . . now go away, shoo."
Not just yes, but hell yes. Never really had a problem or anything but
after 35 years I'm sick and tired of it. I've appreciated the feminine,
the moon cycles, the fecundity, the fertility. It's awesome, . . . now
go away, shoo. I am woman, hear me roar.
December 2006
"[M]y heart goes out to the sisters who know another side of
this."
I did [stop menstruating]! I have had horrible periods for years,
so much so that I missed many professional and personal obligations because
of them and they became near-constant and incapacitating. Happily,
last week, at age 37 I had a hysterectomy. No qualms about it really
and glad to be done with the whole thing. I appreciate how menstruation
connects us to nature, the moon, and all of the spiritual pieces of it
- but honestly, I could not have cared less about any of that once the
pain and illness became so awful. Kudos to you who have manageable
cycles and can appreciate the beautiful aspects of this awesome function
of women's bodies, and my heart goes out to the sisters who know another
side of this.
December 2006
Yes!
I absolutely would love to stop having periods. I've always had super
painful and super long periods that last up to 8 days. I am a happy go
lucky person with minimal PMS, but when my period hits, I hate everything
and everyone. I resent having a period all the more because my husband
and I do not want to have children, so for me, a period is a waste of a
week or more every month of my life. I tried the Depo shot, hoping that
it would end it, but I had breakthrough bleeding for the entire time and
it was miserable. For now, I am content to wait for the glorious days of
menopause. I would trade all this in happily for hot flashes and hormone
therapy.
November 2006
No! "As with many other women with an early onset of what
was later diagnosed as bipolar, mine was
set off by my first period."
I think it is so easy for many women, especially young girls just starting
out to say "Yes! Make it stop!". Most people if they knew what
effect my periods have on me would probably be shocked by my answer. Which
of course is No, I would not stop menstruating. I have bipolar I, it is
genetic and I had an early onset of it. As with many other women with
an early onset of what was later diagnosed as bipolar, mine was set
off by my first period. The rapid shift in hormones combined with severe
personal stress caused my first and arguably most severe manic episode.
Every month my period and I met on the battleground and in the end neither
of us won, I was fighting against the wrong enemy. There is a growing amount
of evidence as of late to indicate the additional negative aspects of bipolar
that women face with it. The hormone fluctuations not only wreak havoc
upon us in general, but also have been proven to disrupt the effectiveness
of many commonly prescribed bipolar medications, such as lithium. When
I found that out, I felt a bit relieved, because I had thought that my
medications just weren't working and thought so several times until I noticed
that they only seemed less effective during PMS and my period. I also re-experience
side effects of my medication which usually only happens when the dose
is raised. I will have stronger urges to do self-destructive things, which
I already went into treatment for over a year ago and gave up. Also,
though I do not particularly have a bad temper I will sometimes be full
of rage.
But I have been on the other side of the fence I was placed on continuous
birth control pills several years ago to disastrous results. They aided
in one of my very few psychotic episodes and I had to go completely off
the Pill after that. Placing bipolar women on regular birth control or
the type meant to suppress their period most of the time is a common avenue,
but many like me can not tolerate the Pill. I also can't be placed on anti-depressants
even during my period as is prescribed for bipolar women and those
with PMDD, because in me they trigger hypomania and suicidal ideation.
For 12 months I did not menstruate; I started again late last year. This
was due to anorexia nervosa - that was the biggest fight I ever waged against
my body in general and my period and I did not come away from that unscathed.
So people must think I'm crazy to not want to stop my period, right? Well,
after all, bipolar people are already crazy. It should be noted that my
sarcasm does not always translate well in my writing. I however think I
am so much closer to sane then anyone might think, because I've stopped
fighting against what is a natural occurrence in my body and in the average
woman's body. So, back to that year without my period. I do not believe
that I have ever felt more disconnected with myself then in that year -
that is what anorexia feeds off of. It is a special kind of awesome when
you become so out of touch with what your body needs and wants to do, that
your roommate has to take care of your cat because you no longer can
because her needs confuse and annoy you. As strange as it may sound,
bleeding is a sign that you are still alive. I didn't want to bleed because
I didn't want to be alive and I certainly didn't want to be healthy which
to me meant FAT. Healthy women have periods; the bleeding is a sign that
things are the way they are supposed to be inside of your body.
Not having a period aided in that disconnection so much more then one
might imagine. Think about this: it took extreme restriction that fell
into starvation, rapid and severe weight loss, excessive exercise with
no fuel due to a lack of nutrition and proper sleep, to stop my period.
So think about what those tiny little Pills or patches have to do inside
of your body to make your period stop. The war against your period doesn't
have to become visible on the outside to still be damaging you inside.
I had a few very nice chats about why I don't use the Pill with an
experienced registered nurse when I was in treatment. She did not
want the Pill abolished or anything like that, her opinion was not coming
from that arena, but rather that she wanted women to make better-informed
choices. Taking a Pill that has to severely shift your hormones and add
more to prevent pregnancy or a period is pretty extreme when you think
about it, especially since condoms and diaphragms exist. Now, I am not
against birth control used for just that, birth control; every woman has
to make that choice for herself. But I am strongly against its use for
stopping menstruation. All the things that stop your period w/o pills are
extremes: illness, malnourishment which can occur in the underweight
as well as the overweight, surgery, etc. The birth control pill is not
the only problem. The pharmaceutical companies want to shove more and more
pills down our throats every year. Why take something unnecessary?
No matter what the media and advertisers may tell you, naturally occurring
events in your life really aren't meant to be convenient. I have to
do more then the average woman during PMS and my period to keep myself
intact. On a regular basis I have to work on that, which is another sign
I'm healthy because I want to take care of myself and accept my body's
needs, wants, and functions. Society, the media, and the advertising
industry spend a lot of time, energy, and even money telling me what they
think is wrong with my body and its normal functions. I think it is so
much easier to just nod my head and say okay, just give in to everything
that they tell me is wrong and then try to fix it. But I am way past
that point in my life. I change the things I want to change as
long as they are coming from a healthy place in my mind and do not
take extreme measures to do so or cause an undue hardship on my wallet.
If it takes extreme measures or expense, both, or has the wrong motivation
then no mater how tempting it may sound I just back away, because I have
to question the mental soundness of someone who doesn't. We aren't meant
to be perfect; the goal of human perfection died when Machiavelli showed
up to the party and it doesn't need to come back now. So I'm not going
to be taking any Pills or do anything else to cease menstruation - after
all I had to work really hard to become healthy enough again just for the
privilege of seeing that sign of life come from within my body. This
is my body and I've reclaimed it as such, so I'm not going to be quiet
or plug it up or carry discrete pads and tampons with me, because God forbid
anyone ever know that you're bleeding.
Ah, but I realize at this point that I might as well be talking to the
wall, because when you won't let people make you ashamed of your period
then people are already lost. So it's easy to jump to all kinds of negative
stereotypes about me because I choose to keep my period and not allow anyone
to make me feel it's dirty, gross, or unnatural. One of the biggest things
stressed to anorectics is the importance of menstruation to their body
and that the lack of it is a sign of an unhealthy body. I fail to see why
taking Pills to stop it is any less unhealthy. It's a distinction without
a difference.
November 2006
A Zambian writes Yes!
Having my monthly period has denied me a 100% fulfillment of life, people,
laughter, and is a huge career obstacle! For about 10 days of each
month, my life changes! First signs are: I become unsociable, very
quiet, unable to enjoy other people's company, impatient, rude, AND worst
of all, I become STUPID. I seriously do not have the same intellectual
capabilities during this period. The second phase (as soon as bleeding
starts), the aforementioned still with me but, but to top it all, the pain
is horrific, I pop painkillers way beyond the prescribed dosage for 3 days.
I am 45 and been suffering since age 16. I am tired of apologizing
to the people I offend during this period. I am going to my doctor
today, enough is enough. Any treatment, pill or surgical, will do
to take it away.
Fed up !
November 2006
"So would I stop menstruating if I could? I only do four
times a year and would not change it for anything."
First, I have been very surprised by the reactions of women to this
topic both in life and on this page. I would have thought all women
would want to reduce the number of periods they have but I realize there
are reasons why many do not which seem to include religious reasons and
peace of mind that the individual is not pregnant. I started my period
at the age of 12 and for the first two years it was not a problem. At
fourteen I began to have irregular and painful periods and my entire personality
changed. I was diagnosed by some doctors as bipolar and others as having
major depression. I became sexually active a few months before I turned
17 and found that my boyfriends thought I was crazy for three weeks of
the month. I felt crazy. I was either so depressed I could barely
function or running around like a madman screaming at people. When
I came to college my doctors tried many different pills (not birth control),
from Zoloft to pills for people who have seizures. I became an even
less functioning member of society and eventually had to drop out of school
because I was unable to function properly enough to make it to class or
to do homework. I began working and used up every vacation, sick and
personal day due to my depression and inability to either get out of bed
or not become hateful at work. I began dating my now husband at 18
and we had many issues due to my issues and inability to function as other
people. I felt insane and believe that for a time I was. My husband
and I had used condoms as our first protection until I realized that my
yeast infections were directly related to the use of condoms so we had
non protected sex (I have endometriosis and believe this is why I did not
get pregnant at this time) for about five years. Let me also say that
I eat very healthy, exercise regularly, do yoga and have an herbalist. I
still had severe periods in which I eventually began taking the strongest
muscle relaxers I could find and sleeping through the first two days of
my period. For someone who is very careful about what she puts in
her body this was horrible for me. Four years ago I began taking birth
control pills (I am now 28) and found that although my body had become
regulated (a relief in itself) I was still trapped in depression and three
and a half years ago quit my job due to my inability to be a reliable employee. When
I quit my job I lost my insurance and quit taking the medications the doctors
had been giving me. I also had to quit the birth control pills for
a while due to money. I was still having mental issues. When
money got better I got back on the pills and the change was immediate. I
was given two weeks of sanity a month instead of just one. My relationship
with my husband improved so much he asked me to marry him. I was able
to go back to school full time. Then I learned I could have my period
a few times a year and have been doing it for two years now. This
has changed my life. I lived with depression, manic stages, anger,
and a feeling that I was going to end up in a hospital for over ten years.
I have no depressive qualities anymore. I have meaningful relationships
with others. I graduated from college. The periods I do have are not
anywhere near as bad as they used to be and I am able to be a productive
wife, daughter, friend and member of society. So would I stop menstruating
if I could? I only do four times a year and would not change it for
anything. It has given me a life and sanity I never thought I would
find. I believe I am more of a woman because of this than I was when
I had my period every month. A period does not make you a woman, your
acts and kindness to others does.
October 2006
"I plan to have a party when I stop menstruating - today wouldn't
be soon enough for me."
A resounding YES!!! I despise having my period every month. I have been
experiencing my period since I was 11 years old and my family is known
to menstruate into their 50s - 40 years of blood every single month is
just too much! I'm a 39-year-old American mother of one and although I
am grateful that I was able to have my daughter because of menstruation,
I would quit in a minute. I find it to be messy, smelly, sometimes
painful, and usually inconvenient. Every vacation, or any other occasion
when having it would possibly crank up the difficulty by arriving, it does. Twice
this year alone I have had a vacation and a weekend away with my husband
(that hadn't occurred in 6 years) ruined by "Aunt Flo."
I plan to have a party when I stop menstruating - today wouldn't be
soon enough for me.
October 2006
"I was experiencing a wonderful 'period' of what is known as
'lactational amenorrhea'"
I did stop menstruating for over two years. One might wonder if
it was a disease or maybe I'm some super athlete or something. Neither
of these is true. I was experiencing a wonderful "period"
of what is known as "lactational amenorrhea." It's when
a baby's breastfeeding is enough to suppress ovulation and menstruation. I
went longer than most women without getting a period. The average
time is about 14.5 months postpartum for menses to return. I was 18.5
months postpartum. It was a nice break from having to buy menstrual
products or worry about messing up my "good" underwear. Now
that my cycle has returned I am quite anxious to become pregnant again
for numerous reasons. But the period without my period after baby
comes and lochia (bleeding after childbirth) stops really is nice!
October 2006
"It makes me more mentally and spiritually clear."
Hi MUM,
I wouldn't stop. I am a pagan and use my blood in rituals. I like the
idea of it, how it connects me with the earth, especially in our modern
world. Sometimes it can hurt and I have had periods where I have had to
change the tampon every 15 minutes one night (is that healthy? It only
happened once) but overall, I like it. It makes me more mentally and spiritually
clear.
Take care,
***
October 2006
"I love to feel the cramps. It reminds me of being in labor,
and the power that I found there."
I am a 36-year-old woman. I would never give my period up! I like that
it is regular, I love to feel the cramps. It reminds me of being in labor,
and the power that I found there. The power that resides deep within me,
connecting me to all women who have lived before, and all to come. I am
connected to the animals, the moon and all of life. I love my period. I
am teaching my daughters by example that a period is a good thing, cramps
are part of the power of being a woman, and just to be happy not ashamed.
I cannot imagine not having my period every month! I think I would feel
very strange about not having my period.
October 2006
No. "I know that science can medicate all that away for
me, but like ADD/ADHD and some depressions, I think magic pills take away
from the multiplicity of human experience."
I'm a 32-year-old an American mother of three and and a graduate student
and an educator in Southern California. I would not, at this juncture in
my life, choose to stop my periods or even choose fewer cycles.
I looked forward to starting my period as a girl and was overjoyed when
I entered the sorority of women at the start of my menses. In my late teens
I began suffering from furious cramping but had only moderate bleeding
and relatively short periods (3-4 days). After I found myself unexpectedly
pregnant with my son at 24, I decided to take Dep-Provera and after two
years was very unhappy with the way my body felt. I was in a permanent
state of PMS, overweight and obsessed with what kind of disgusting mass
must have grown within my womb in that two year period (oops! a pun!).
My periods gradually gained in length as I became older, and with each
birth of a child were markedly heavier. Two years ago I suffered a miscarriage
at four months pregnant and nearly hemorrhaged to death. The ER looked
like a sound stage for a horror movie, one that had hundreds of victims
and a chainsaw in it. Since that miscarriage, I had an IUD inserted which
has only aggravated my periods to the point that I bleed through a super-plus
tampon and a pad in an hour on my first two days. This is more than a little
traumatic - every month I feel some small retroactive mourning and fear
because of the association to my miscarriage. Despite this, I would never
give up my periods. They are such a part of me - the ebb and flow of my
emotions (oops! another pun), the swell and deflation of my breasts, my
cranky days, my uber-creative ones, and my favorite time of the month,
ovulation, when I can't take my hands off my husband or myself. I know
that science can medicate all that away for me, but like ADD/ADHD
and some depressions, I think magic pills take away from the multiplicity
of human experience. Some women have no problems with their periods, some
are plagued by them. I am the woman I am in a large part because of my
relationship to my body - my awareness of my cycle, my knowledge of how
my parts work, my connection to my fertility.
And so, even if it meant never bleeding on my favorite panties, or not
having to take two days off of work each month to curl up with a heating
pad and a bottle of Lortab, even if it meant that I would be perfectly
rational and never explode with pent up hormonal rage again, I wouldn't
trade my periods for the world.
As a side note, in grad school I wrote and presented a paper on Faulkner's
Light in August. I argued that the main character is plagued by
mental demons because, unlike the female characters in the book, he lacks
the capacity to physically cleanse his body of "sins" via menstruation.
I argued (rather cleverly in my opinion) that his castration at the end
of the book provides him salvation because he sheds his life blood like
we shed our endometria. If you're interested in the paper, let me know
and I'll happily provide you a copy. [I accepted!]
Thanks for reading!
October 2006
No. "I like the idea of not being the same emotionally, hormonally,
physically, mentally, all the time."
My first thought is yes, that would be nice. I hate the blood and mess
every month. I'm lucky to have a fairly average period, which gives me
some cramps the first few days (if I'm not quick enough with the ibuprofen
I get awful cramps, but they can always be managed with the medicine),
some PMS (some months worse than others--I've gone two weeks sometimes
with sore breasts before finally getting my period), and a nice 5 day,
predictable flow that starts slow and ends slow and never gets unbearably
heavy. Even with these things working for me, though, I still manage to
get bloodstains on at least one pair of pants about once every 3 months,
and sometimes also on the sheets. I don't like the feeling of wearing a
pad (I hate the thought of tampons even more, and have never used one),
especially towards the end of my cycle when there's just a little bit of
blood but I still need something. I do tend towards mood swings and oversensitivity.
I hate cramps. I hate worrying about whether or not the dog is going to
drag my pads out of the garbage and chew them up, strewing bits of them
all over the house (I live with housemates, and don't like this for the
embarrassment factor). It's just a pain, and I'm always relieved once it's
over for another month. (I'm also lucky in that my period is very regular.)
But. As I thought about this (and I can't justify this answer; it's
mostly instinct), I decided I really wouldn't want to give up the cycle,
in part because it's so interesting to me. On the first two days of my
period especially, I feel a greatly heightened sensitivity which makes
me aware of things I wouldn't normally be aware of. My dreams are vivid.
I feel creative. (And also like I want to hide in a shack somewhere and
not have to deal with people, but hey.) I wouldn't give this up. I like
the idea of not being the same emotionally, hormonally, physically, mentally,
all the time. I like watching myself to see how my energy is different
at different times of the month, seeing how these different energy phases
affect what I want to do and what I am able to do. Unless there were some
way to retain these cycles and changes and sensitive periods while giving
up the blood and cramps, etc., I'd have to say no, I wouldn't give up my
period.
(age 24, been menstruating since I was 11)
September 2006
Yes. "I don't need my period to remind me 'Oh yeah, I am a female.'"
Firstly, I'd like to say that I've read many of the comments on the
site and I think the feedback (positive or negative) from so many conscious
women is a wonderful thing. Many have said that this whole process is about
womanhood and being female and showing the pride of your gender. I'd like
to tell my story. When I was 11 years old, I started my period. It was
extremely light and I could still ride my bicycle or jump on the trampoline,
so as you can guess it was not very painful, either. At about the age of
15, it took a drastic turn. Up until that point I had been using regular
pads, but all of a sudden it got so heavy that I had to start using overnight
pads just to last me for a couple of hours. Along with this I also suffered
severe cramps (easily compared to someone taking a knife and stabbing it
in your uterus, sides, and back), vomiting, dizziness, and just overall
fatigue and laziness. One of my last memories of junior high was due to
my period. It was "that time of the month" and I was at school.
I had been feeling pretty crummy all day and it was getting close to the
end of the day. I was in Physical Science class and all of a sudden the
girl beside me looked at me in a horrified, worried sort of way. I felt
extremely cold, but sweat was rolling off my face. All I remember during
this time was the feeling of all that blood leaving my body and how I wish
it'd just stop for a few minutes. Soon after this, I fainted and some very
generous classmates had to take me to the office and they called my parents
and I went home. It was embarrassing when I finally went back. A lot of
guys had no clue and kept asking "What was wrong??" "I thought
you were going to die. What's wrong with you??" and I couldn't very
well say "Oh, you know... just my menstrual cycle." [Why not?
That's a big part of the menstruation problem in the U.S.A. - Harry Finley]
Anyway, my period ended up causing many similar situations all through
my high school years. When I turned 17, I decided that I wanted to give
blood because I had heard about how it can help save lives and I wanted
to do my part. Well, they go through a series of tests before you can actually
get to the phase of giving blood. I was denied because I didn't have enough
iron, so I told my Mom and she took me to the doctor for blood work. Come
to find out, I have iron deficiency anemia. I've been taking iron pills
and while my iron levels are borderline normal, I still feel tired and
fatigued during my periods. I'm now soon to be 19 in a few weeks and I
just started my first semester of college. College is a lot different from
high school in many ways. In high school, it was accepted to miss an occasional
day and making up a test was not such a big deal. It's best not to miss
a test in college because even if you get a professor that is gracious
enough to give you a makeup exam, it's usually going to be a lot more difficult
than the original one.
I know I probably sound whiney and fragile, but my period has just caused
too much extra stress in my life. And the ironic thing is, if I stress
over something else happening in my life, my period really likes to tell
me about it by coming early, being late, or giving me worse cramps or extra
bleeding. I mentioned womanhood and being an empowered female earlier.
I love being a woman and I feel empowered because of who I am, but my period
does not make me a female. I don't need my period to remind me "Oh
yeah, I am a female." While I do understand that one should embrace
who they are and try to stay as natural as possible, sometimes it just
can't be helped. I don't know that I would actually suppress my period
because I don't know the long term effects or how dangerous it can be,
but I'm going to talk to my doctor about it because I've really had enough.
I really think that a lot of the comments that woman have posted were over
judgmental. Just remember that you can't really try to make someone enjoy
their "womanhood" until you've walked a mile in their shoes.
- I've Had Enough
September 2006
Menstruation is a painful reminder
Yes. I am 25, am completely infertile, and a period is nothing more
than a painful reminder every month that I can't have children.
September 2006
Polish woman is ashamed of menstruation
I know that my English is not perfect but I come from Poland. I hate
it when I get my period. It's the worst thing. I am ashamed. I'm not the
same person those days. I would stop it.
September 2006
A Malaysian woman, a biologist, says probably, at least for a while.
And "[o]ur church was going to the beach for a camp. My twelve-year-old
sister and her then-best friend Lyn were on their periods and were a bit
upset that they'd be unable to swim at the beach (tampon use is still uncommon
in Malaysia due to cultural taboos and the *&@#*! things being priced
about RM1 apiece."
Dear Mr. Finley,
I just wrote an entry for my blog about menstruation and the idea of
stopping menstruation, and then I remembered that the last time I had looked
at the MUM site, you had been asking readers about it. So here are some
of my thoughts on the subject. You've probably brought up or had other
people bring up similar points on the website already, but I'm not sure
because there's so much content I haven't read all of it, so please pardon
me if I repeat things others have written:
I read in a book (can't remember the author or title, sorry, but I know
it was in the Lawrence University library as of 2004) that anthropologists
and biologists kept asking why female primates had evolved such a wasteful
behavior as menstruation. You lose energy, proteins, and a substantial
amount of iron. Then it occurred to someone to estimate whether not menstruating
would save more energy...and it turned out that (according to their estimates,
anyway) it's more effective to get rid of endometrium periodically (bad
pun alert!) than to bear the energetic cost of keeping all that vasculature
and tissue alive.
Then again, the amount of energy saved by this process probably doesn't
count for much given the high caloric intake of people in lower-middle-class
and up lifestyles. Human society's changing faster than our bodies can.
There's probably something in the theory that the female human body
isn't designed to be menstruating on a regular basis, given that so many
girls have problems with it, sometimes to the point of incapacitation.
Another bunch of anthropologists studied primitive societies and found
that women in those societies have a few tens of menstrual periods in a
lifetime compared to the hundreds that women in mainstream, urbanised societies
experience.
They start later (girls' periods in modern societies are starting earlier
and earlier due to more calories in childhood, and possibly environmental
pollutants that mimic estrogens), have more pregnancies, and breast feed
longer. I don't think the last is simply a consequence of having to rush
to the factory/office or brainwashing by milk powder advertisements...it's
just that if it's socially acceptable to carry around your baby every single
minute and don't wear a bra or even a shirt, it's just easier. (Not having
periods while breast feeding lactation amenorrhea if I remember correctly...or
would that be amenorrhoea in UK spelling?)
Which brings me to an interesting connection with new technology, which
is the birth-control pill that allows you to menstruate only 3-4 times
per year. They're made of more or less the same stuff as normal birth-control
pills, but you don't take the dummy pills every 28 days so you don't bleed,
either. Apparently dancers, athletes, and other women who find periods
inconvenient have known about this trick for a long time.
Some people might argue that controlling menstruation in this way is
unnatural - precisely why conventional pills have some fake ones in every
month, to allow bleeding - but the new counter to that, based on the anthropological
findings described above, is that we're NOT supposed to menstruate 12 times
a year through our reproductive spans, so the new pills aren't necessarily
unhealthy (at least, not for that particular reason).
My personal opinion is that if I get married while I'm young, I would
probably use a pill that allowed me to suspend my periods over the conventional
kind. Since I'm not affected much psychologically or physically by my cycle,
I don't have strong feelings either way.
[The first time I encountered birth-control pills was, strange to say,
in the context of controlling menstruation. Our church was going to the
beach for a camp. My twelve-year-old sister and her then-best friend Lyn
were on their periods and were a bit upset that they'd be unable to swim
at the beach (tampon use is still uncommon in Malaysia due to cultural
taboos and the *&@#*! things being priced about RM1 apiece).
[Lyn's dad, a gynaecologist gave them some pills and told them to take
the pills to stop their periods. So they did, and we all went swimming.
But when I told my sister what the pills were, she said "I don't believe
you!" Hehe.]
Yours sincerely,
**** [a Chinese name]
Petaling Jaya, Malaysia
age 23, biologist
-----------------
She added these excellent words:
We must not confuse dissent with disloyalty. Edward R. Murrow, journalist
(1908-1965)
September 2006
Woman from Zambia: menstruation is a"wonderful experience of
womanhood," but "very inconvenient especially when . . . traveling."
I myself like to have my periods though most of the time it is very
inconvenient especially when you are traveling. But when you are at home
it's a wonderful experience of womanhood. It makes us different from men.
[The writer also added the section on Zambia on Words
and expressions about
menstruation.]
September 2006
"I see it as a curse, a harsh reminder from my body and
my brain that if and when I start having sex (yes, I am still a virgin,
and plan to remain that way for as long as I possibly can), I'd better be
careful to make sure I'm adequately prepared against pregnancy . . . . I
don't need this curse to prove that I'm a woman. I have other far less
painful and most definitely less disgusting methods of showing that
I'm female."
In response to the discussion taking place at your website:
Yes, I would stop if I could. I started getting my period at Easter
1997, when I was nearly 13 - I am now 22, and I truly dread getting
it. That year, I got mine twice in the one month at one point. When I don't
get it, I celebrate, even though it means it turns my cycle on its head
completely. For example - I didn't get my period last month, and as far
as I can remember I didn't get it the month before either. A
cause for celebration? Oh yes, that it is.
I don't see it as a gift or a blessing. I see it as a curse, a harsh reminder
from my body and my brain that if and when I start having sex (yes,
I am still a virgin, and plan to remain that way for as long as I possibly
can), I'd better be careful to make sure I'm adequately prepared against
pregnancy - as a militantly child free woman who absolutely despises
the mere sight of children and would happily have an abortion
if need be, falling pregnant just because my significant other neglected
to use a condom would be the ultimate smack in the face. A punishment,
if you will.
I see no possible benefit to it. I often get cramps (both in my lower
back and stomach) that are so painful that I can barely walk - I
have to dose myself with Nuprofen or Advil (whichever is cheaper at the
time - paracetamol doesn't have an effect on the pain, so ibuprofen is
my chosen course of action) just to rid myself of the pain. Hot baths
or using a hot water bottle don't ease the cramping, and believe me I have
tried both. I can't afford to go on the Pill, and seeing as it entails
a doctor's visit just to get the prescription for it, I doubt very much
it will happen any time soon. I refuse to have children, as I have all
of my life, and as the saying goes, if I want to hear the pitter-patter
of tiny feet I'll put shoes on my cat. I'm a writer - my characters are
the perfect substitutes for children, because they will do exactly as I
tell them to do, without even the slightest hint of an argument. I don't
need this curse to prove that I'm a woman. I have other far less painful
and most definitely less disgusting methods of showing that I'm female.
September 2006
Nope. "I've gone for months at a time without my cycle and have
never been so uncomfortable in my life, not just because of the 'could be
pregnant' factor, but because I felt out of sync."
Nope. I love having my period. I have cramps, for which I take over-the-counter
meds or use a heating pad. Blood doesn't bother me. I'm one of the lucky
ones.
I've gone for months at a time without my cycle and have never been
so uncomfortable in my life, not just because of the 'could be pregnant'
factor, but because I felt out of sync. PMS didn't go away just because
I stopped bleeding, and I've learned to welcome my period as a relief from
the other symptoms. It means my body is functioning as it should and I
can relax and know that the moodiness and fatigue are gone for a few weeks.
I feel pity for the women who have such terrible periods. I would probably
be less enamoured of mine if they were so bad.
Fabulous web site, btw. I love it!
August 2006
"No. I see my period as a cleansing function." But
maybe in some cases . . . .
No. I see my period as a cleansing function. Men don't have
this advantage and the idea (rightly or wrongly) has been floated that
they don't tend to live as long because of the lack of this cleansing process.
[Some researchers believe that the regular shedding of blood lowers the
iron content of the body, which in turn lowers what they feel is a risk
of heart disease caused by too much iron. At least that's one take on this.
-Harry Finley] I am 38 years old and have observed the way that drugs
and procedures (like tubal ligation, vasectomy, Ritalin , etc.) are usually
not the risk-free solution popularly touted. I would have questions
as to the affect on the mental, emotional and physical health of my body,
and doubts that the benefits (no mess, pain, inconvenience) would outweigh
the side-affects. Having said that, if I was having a seriously traumatic
time of it, then the benefits may be much higher. It could be a wonderful
option for those who have serious need of it. Without that need, I'm
guessing that caution would be appropriate.
In USA
August 2006
She responds to a comment about her answer
I wanted to respond to a comment made about what I said in June. I wrote
this:
No way! I don't mind having my period. I think women have periods for
a reason other than the fact that it enables us to get pregnant. I would
never get rid of my period on purpose. At least not for a long time. It's
OK to suppress it because you may be going on a trip and don't want the
hassle of having your period - but to suppress it forever? No! I like knowing
when I'm not pregnant. I'm not saying I look forward to it every month
but I'm very comfortable with having a period. It's what makes us special
;^)
June 2006
Another writer wrote this:
FOR THE ONE WHO SAID SHE LIKED HAVING PERIODS BECAUSE THEY LET HER KNOW
THAT SHE'S NOT PREGNANT, I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU: YOU CAN STILL HAVE PERIODS
AND BE PREGNANT AT THE SAME TIME. THE BEST THING FOR YOU IS USE CONDOMS
AND STOP DEPENDING ON YOUR PERIODS TO COME SO YOU CAN REASSURE YOURSELF
THAT YOU'RE NOT PREGNANT.
I WAS PREGNANT WITH MY LAST CHILD AND HAD A PERIOD FOR THREE MONTHS.
WHAT MAKES IT SO BAD IS THAT MY PERIODS WERE AWFUL. I WAS FLOWING HEAVILY,
CRAMPING TO THE POINT WHERE I COULDN'T WALK, AND TAKING PRESCRIPTION MEDICATION
FOR THE PAIN. BY THE GRACE OF GOD, MY DAUGHTER CAME OUT PERFECT. WHEN MY
PERIOD FINALLY STOPPED, I TOOK A PREGNANCY TEST AND IT CAME OUT POSITIVE.
WHEN I WENT TO THE DOCTOR AND GOT AN ULTRASOUND, I WAS ALREADY 4 MONTHS
PREGNANT. SO AGAIN TO THE PERSON WHO IS DEPENDING ON HER PERIOD: PLEASE
STOP AND START PROTECTING YOURSELF!!!!!!!!
June 2006
Ok, now I'm responding to the above comment:
What I want to say is that most normal menstruating women don't have
a period during their pregnancies;I didn't when I was pregnant. First of
all, I'm not some teen running around having unprotected. sex. I'm
a 28 -year-old married mother of one child and I have pretty reliable birth
control (IUD) that I have had for more than three years so I am protecting
myself from pregnancy. Yes, I still think having a period does leave
me confident that I'm not pregnant because I never ever in my life
missed a period until I was preggers [pregnant]! For her to say
don't rely on your period to prove you are not pregnant is a
bit ridiculous cuz millions of normal menstruating women besides myself
use that as a pretty reliable indicator that pregnancy has not occurred!
In her case she was indeed preggers! I m sorry that happened. However,
that's not the norm! Sure, she had a period for a few months during her
pregnancy but most women don't.
August 2006
Hungarian woman "not so delighted about ... the 'clever ones,'
those girls or women who are trying to teach others a lesson" on this
page.
This letter is just a personal observation, I leave it to your discretion
whether to publish any of it on your site. No criticism intended, I continue
to admire my MUM. :)
I still go and check out your Comments page every week because I'm sincerely
interested in the variety of opinions your readers provide. I saw a Croatian
girl's comment, and her reaction is close to mine - so good to see there
are others like us, hating the monthly curse and finding the courage to
express that.
What I'm not so delighted about is the 'clever ones' - those girls or
women who are trying to teach others a lesson. Telling others how they
should feel, think and act about their menstruation. I've always hated
unsolicited advice, maybe it's an inherent fault of mine. I consider it
a form of harshly generalized judgment, without real knowledge of the other
person's situation.
Your question is, "Would YOU stop menstruating?" Comments
like "Yes/No, and (personal reasons for that)" are fine. But
comments like "How horrible that some women hate their period! Here's
my advice to them..." are not. They're simply out of place because
they get personal, even if they don't mention names.
I guess such comments would be great in a discussion thread where the
others can make their responses to the "clever one." (I guess
she'd be surprised that others have actually thought of, gosh forbid, TRIED,
the things she's advocating.)
Alternatively, there could be a separate "Advice to Period Haters"
page where these people could freely comment.
This is no request or piece of advice, I myself would hate to play smart.
I just wanted to know if I'm the only one bothered by such comments. Also
I'd love to know what you think. [I'm going to continue mixing up the comments
since I think most people would like to see what others think, even if
they strongly disagree as you do.]
Best wishes to you & your cats :) [Thanks! The cats say Hi! OK,
at least I can imagine they do. When I try to tell them things like your
wishes they cut me short by dozing off, walking away or suddenly washing
themselves. You can't be too clean even if you're risking hairballs.]
****
August 2006
No. She has a genetic disorder: "After
six months of the Pill, I took myself off and never refilled the prescription.
The relief was immediate. I began to take responsibility for my own body."
Frankly, I wish I would do this more often. There was a time, however,
that I wished otherwise, and I would have embraced and stood with each
of the women for whom their times were achingly, screamingly, howlingly
awful, and cried for redress of some kind. To say that I was young and
foolish once is a little painful for me, but there was indeed a time when
I would cheerfully have liked to have had done with the biology of
the thing altogether.
I suppose that all things come in their own time. I've had a little
of each perspective, and coming out of it I am a little sadder and a little
wiser.
The story of my womb has a happy beginning. The initiation into womanhood
was my own delightful secret, for which my mother had lovingly prepared
me. I was very pleased when my first blood came, and felt quite happy.
It was my twelfth birthday.
Further into adolescence, the mood swings, the headaches, and the generally
snarky bits of PMS came and went. The thing wasn't nearly as predictable
as I wanted it to be, but I was assured that this too was normal, at least
for the women in my family. But by the time I was nineteen, the novelty
of the thing had worn off. This was helped along by the fact that my mother
and I synched up enough that her PMS was a week before mine, and my PMS
was during her period, and then I would have mine. So in our house, there
was a whole month of hysterics at a time, with one or two weeks of blessed,
blissful normalcy in between.
I wanted an exorcism for one of us, or a divorce.
When the cramps started getting bad I began wishing it would all go
away. It felt like demons trying to claw themselves out of my gut.
It interrupted my life, the sanctity of my sleep, everything.
Later on I was diagnosed with endometriosis and polycystic ovarian syndrome,
and put on birth control pills to 'regulate' my cycle. The times of bleeding
and not bleeding were channeled into the twenty-eight days of the status
quo, as my body was chemically induced to toe the line.
There was something inside though, that refused this sort of coercion.
I know not why, but my typically sweet-tempered, even-keeled self became
a cold-hearted, kvetching bitch from hell, and there was not one of
my friends who knew me then who would not tell you so. I said so myself,
and I didn't care.
College was like a nightmare for my body. My period couldn't handle
college. It left. Every time I came home or went to visit a friend, it
was as though it was pure relief flooding out of me along with my blood.
What I had styled as a curse and more or less grudgingly accepted as the
way of a woman's life I had begun to really miss, and really want back.
I felt I had lost something of myself.
After six months of the Pill, I took myself off and never refilled the
prescription. The relief was immediate. I began to take responsibility
for my own body. With better nutrition and a better familiarity with
the workings of my body [Toni Welscher's "Taking Charge of Your
Fertility" is a top-notch book], I was able to come to a place that
I believe to be my actual "normal": thirty-five to forty-eight
days.
That being said, having a genetic disorder [PCOS] that affects
the endocrine system, including the reproductive system, really sucks.
So I have come to the place in my life where I have walked through the pain,
the deadness and the darkness, and come to accept that my womb
is what she is.
So the answer to the question is no, no, a hundred thousand times,
no. Give me all that comes or can come with the female experience
of regular bleeding, and I will take it as the gift that it is. I
embrace it, and all that comes with it.
I feel all kinds of sympathy for those who have expressed their desire
to be rid of this part of their experience. I felt that way too once, for
nearly all of the same reasons. Each woman's path shapes her perspective
into something unique to her. My experience has given me a change
of heart, and now I wish to have more of what I once wanted none of at
all.
The irony of this is certainly not lost on me; but the beauty
of experience is that sometimes it not only makes you stronger, it
gives you the gift of a better perspective... and that is very
nice.
Kind regards,
****
25, South Carolina, U.S.A.
"Build a fire for a man and he will be warm for a day. Set fire
to a man and he will be warm for the rest of his life."
~ Terry Pratchett, Jingo
August 2006
Yes. She too has a genetic disorder: "[F]or
several years, I had a note in my school file that I was excused from dressing
out and participating in gym during my period, and not one teacher respected
that note. . . . In my opinion, there are far more arguments against having
a period than there are for having one, but this is just my opinion."
Yes. I'm 18 years old, and while this is young, I already know
I do not want to bear children and would desperately like to get rid of
my period for good. I have a relatively rare blood disorder (von Willebrand's
disease), which means my blood is very thin and missing a vital clotting
factor. I'm chronically anemic because of extremely heavy periods, and
thus have to deal with the tiredness and other symptoms of that. Before
I started taking hormones, I'd often go months without a period, only to
bleed for many days at a time, or I'd have 10-14 days of heavy bleeding,
then a short break, then go right back to bleeding again. At one point,
I bled heavily for over a month without stopping. That was what prompted
my taking hormones in the first place, and when they got my blood work
back, I had a hemoglobin (the protein that helps blood carry oxygen) count
of 4, far below that of a normal person! My doctor was called in
the middle of the night, the lab convinced that I should be in a hospital
immediately. Of course, I'd been living with it so long that my body
was used to it.
I also experience intense cramps, bloating, diarrhea, lightheadedness,
headaches, and backaches while on my periods. Luckily, I have a high
pain tolerance. Because of my blood disorder, I cannot take Midol
or many other pain medications because of their blood-thinning properties. I'm
limited, in essence, to Tylenol for my OTC pain needs. Thus, I generally
do without.
I do not want to bear children. Not only do I not want to pass
on this disorder (which is genetic), but it's very possible I could die
from blood loss during childbirth. There are also plenty of alternatives
to bearing a child of my own, including adoption, and particularly of older
children who are less likely to get a second chance. Also, because
I am a lesbian, I would have to be artificially inseminated in some way,
provided that I chose to bear children. Far too much hassle and trouble
for me for something which is dangerous to not only myself but the child
in question, when there are plenty of children already living that deserve
a good home already.
No matter how careful I am, periods are messy. I used to wear pads,
the heaviest I could find, and had to change them every few hours. Sometimes
I would wear a tampon for an hour or two, and still need a pad as backup. For
years, I was afraid to wear light-colored pants for fear of staining them. I
still have many pairs of jeans that have the insides with stains in the
crotch, because the blood didn't wash all the way out. It wasn't carelessness
- it's very difficult to check in with the bathroom every two hours when
you're a student, especially in high school or middle school where it seems
every minute is budgeted for. Teachers tend not to be very accommodating
without a note from a doctor, and even with one are often uncooperative
(for several years, I had a note in my school file that I was excused from
dressing out and participating in gym during my period, and not one teacher
respected that note).
I do not find my period "cleansing." I feel horrible
and sick on its worst days, and drained on all but the lightest of them. It's
not because I find the blood disgusting - on the contrary, I would gladly
have sex while on my period, as I find it really does tend to lessen cramps,
provided my partner wasn't disgusted by the whole affair. A period
serves no function for me other than an annoyance whenever it decides to
show up, however, and thus I'd gladly be rid of it.
Now, I'm not saying all women should stop menstruating, but what a woman
(or anyone) does with her body is that person's choice. No one will
be hurt by it that is not involved in the decision process. One can
feel "like a woman" with or without a period every month (if
you disagree, speak to a few male to female transsexuals or menopausal
women or women who have had all that removed). In my opinion, there
are far more arguments against having a period than there are for having
one, but this is just my opinion. I just want the freedom to choose
whether or not I stop my periods completely.
U.S.A.
August 2006
Maybe, maybe not. "Explaining to my boyfriend that was 16 at
the time why I wouldn't have sex with him was like trying to explain astrophysics
to a toddler."
For one I want to say thank you for this very informative site. I will
never look at Kellogg cereal the same way. About
stopping my period and if I would. I really don't know. I say all the time
that if I never had a period again I would love it. Before that meant waiting
for menopause though. I am 31 years old and was the first girl in my class
to get it .BEFORE the horrible videos they showed in school. I was just
barely 9 years old. Money was tight and we got these uncomfortable irritating
boxes of generic pads. I was horrified to have to take them to school to
change them. Then I think I would have stopped it for sure.When I was older,
maybe 12, I refused to use the generic pads and told my mother I would
just not wear them and go without. I started using Tampax. You know I didn't
worry about virginity [see the famous Tampax ad]
I was just so pleased to get rid of that horrible pad. Then things were
not so bad. I became sexually active and, my gosh, that period got in the
way. I hated it. Explaining to my boyfriend who was 16 at the time why
I wouldn't have sex with him was like trying to explain astrophysics to
a toddler. I mean I could spell it out but he still wanted to play. I feel
naughty though because he always got his way ;) A few years ago they introduced
a shot ,well, more than a few. I have had two kids. Relax, I was 21 and
26 when I got pregnant. Then I tried the Depo shot. I did not get a period.
I found myself checking though quite a bit. Then after 6 months with no
show I was worried. I decided the shot wasn't for me.. I gained weight
from it and hated it. So after I went off of it. It took like 3 months.
I had a period I know for three weeks straight. I decided I would not do
that anymore. But back to the question. I am still not sure. I feel bad
for the girls who have periods for 5-10 days. I have always had them for
two days or roughly 42 hours. But trust me, my body gets me. I have severe
headaches and ovary pain from ovulation. Not cramps, this is a pinching
feeling that is quite weird. I have the option and it is there. One day
I may decide to nix my period. I have had my period for 20 years.
I am thinking 15 more won't hurt me but the option is not out of the question.
Thanks for reading.
**** In Montana
August 2006
No. "I chanced to take Seasonale, and rather enjoyed the
three months I got to go without bleeding, but after a year, my whole body
started working differently!"
There is no way in Hell I'd choose to stop my period for good!
I tried stopping it for a while, but that just screwed me up!
I chanced to take Seasonale, and rather enjoyed the three months
I got to go without bleeding, but after a year, my whole body started working
differently! I was having trouble sleeping, having severe stomach problems,
and my periods got longer, heavier, and more painful as I progressed. I am
one of the lucky ones to rarely have pain and heavy bleeding, so this
was extremely disconcerting. I eventually decided to stop taking it,
giving myself a few months without any birth control to let my body get
back into its normal routine. My stomach and sleep problems stopped. However,
when it came time to get back on my previous BC, Ortho Tri Cyclen, I found
that it no longer worked properly. I had breakthrough bleeding and cramping
all the time! (I had to get on regular Ortho Cyclen) I think my body functions
differently now. My periods are definitely heavier.
I feel terrible for the women who can't or won't embrace their periods.
I realize that with some women menstruation is too frequent, too heavy,
too painful, etc, but there ARE ways of helping that. They are not, however,
crying about it and feeling sorry for yourself. If your doctor won't
help you, kick him out and find someone more sympathetic to your troubles.
This is something you cannot help but have. This is your gift, though
it may not seem that way. You bleed each month because each month you have
the potential to create LIFE. Screw being envious of men. We
create men! We can make men and women right in our bodies! And it is a
beautiful and amazing privilege! Even if I had painful periods all the
time, I wouldn't give them up for the world.
To the woman who is glad of her period for heralding her non-pregnancy,
I feel you. And to the woman who decided to berate her IN ALL CAPS for
her supposed foolishness, I think you should assume less. The way I see
it, I like my period for assuring me I'm not pregnant. I don't use it as
the only defense against pregnancy, as I'm sure the other woman didn't
either; it's just reassuring. I use the Pill and condoms, but there's always
the chance that something could go wrong. My period lets me know everything's
still cool.
-****
August 2006
"Yes, yes, a thousand times yes!"
I have to say a resounding yes to that question.
I've been menstruating since I was 11 years old; they started with minimal
pain and almost no cramps, but that ended very quickly. From the age of
13 I've been suffering with menorrhagia and dysmenorrhoea, chronic depression,
cyclic migraines, spotting, hot flushes, acne, bloating, dizziness, loss
of appetite, insomnia, vomiting and diarrhoea. All have been linked to
my menstrual cycle. I had an accident at 17 that left me with internal
bruising to my lower back, and as I already had minor scoliosis (inoperable),
more pain ensued. Now, though I was told there is no noticeable permanent
damage, every time I menstruate, which is irregular and sometimes as often
as twice a month, I am literally almost crippled with pain for days on
end - almost always a full week. It's been so bad that I have ended up
doubled over the toilet vomiting in pain, despite my morphine-based pain
medication! I bleed heavily even on the first day of my period, and frequently
don't get any cramps beforehand to warn me to wear a pantyliner. I use
super-plus tampons and I have to replace them every two and a half hours
because my blood flow is so heavy. I have been prescribed mefenamic acid
to reduce the menorrhagic problems and to eliminate the reason I was taking
birth control pills, as they were causing me PMS even worse than before.
I have several coexisting conditions, so I have to take six medications
daily regardless of anything extra that might stop my menstruation. The
possible infertility implicit in all these possible hormone alterations
isn't a factor in my considerations - I don't want children. I never have
and I seriously doubt that I ever will. Hormonal supplements don't seem
to have any effect on my appearance either, as I have had large breasts
and an almost hourglass figure since I was 12. I'm now 20 years old, and
have another two decades or more of menstruation to look forward to(!).
Luckily for me, to get it over with, the women in my family have a history
of early menopause. I also have to keep to a strict diet, a fairly healthy
one, because I have a multitude of migraine triggers besides my periods.
I'm in almost constant pain daily. I do not need the extra that menstruation
piles upon me.
Would I stop this hell if I could?
Yes, yes, a thousand times yes!
****, England
August 2006
"It's not rocket science. Less chemicals and medications are
the answer - not more."
No.
If your bleeding is too heavy or painful then work out WHY. Don't go
to a M.D. - medication funds their practice mostly - stop taking all the
medications you can, eat real food (organic, no processed rubbish), exercise
and see a naturopath/herbalist. There are some really simple herbs (raspberry
leaf, shepherd's purse, yarrow, cohosh) that make a real difference. [See
also the remedies visitors have sent MUM.] Get
the chemicals out of your life - plastics leach synthetic oestrogens into
your food, especially plastic wraps and when microwaved/heated. Anybody
wonder why us "modern" women have so many troubles - early menstruation,
infertility, obesity, PMS, menopause - we lead quite unnatural lives? It's
not rocket science. Less chemicals and medications are the answer - not
more.
Have sex if you want to when you're bleeding - men need to get over
their fear of blood - it's only your mind holding you back.
Breastfeed as long as you can - it resets your hormones and minimises
your lifetime menstruation - mammals are supposed to be breastfed for about
the first 4 years of life (not as a sole source of nutrition after six
months of course!).
No quick fixes here - men invented those - real healthy lifestyle instead.
P.S. I have a gorgeous friend who developed psychotic depression whilst
on the combined pill - what a horrible illness that was for two years.
Came off the Pill and guess what? We have the beautiful woman 100 percent
back with us, within weeks she was recovering. It's shit medication. You
deserve better.
Australian
July 2006
Portuguese: No
"I'm a 22-year-old girl from Portugal and sometimes I wish I could
stop my period. I get it monthly 'cause I'm taking the Pill. Still, it
lasts for a week, which is very annoying. My biggest problem is not the
awkward kidney, belly and headaches the first two days. It is the way that
menstruating can mess with my head. I get too much sensible, and too much
dumb. I mean in a way that you can find me either crying like hell, or
laughing like the world's collapsing tomorrow, and that's the only great
thing to do. It opens much more my mind, and suffocates me with the way
it puts my mind in to thinking constantly (which I always do) when I'm
tired of it. I get paranoia. Sometimes I wish I could have a button to
turn off for a few days. I want to have kids, but being menstrual can irritate
me pretty bad.
"Cheers"
July 2006
Croatian 16-year-old hates menstruating: "Before coming across
this site, I never knew that there were women who felt as strongly
(and negatively) about this as I do, and now I finally don't feel alone
anymore thanks to some brilliant comments on these pages." [There
are six Web pages and hundreds of comments from readers, pro and con, starting
right below.]
I'm 16. I got my first period at the age of ten. It was literally gut-wrenching
and traumatic but lasted only a day. I got my next period when I was 12
and since then they've been coming every 25-40 days. That first day when
I was 10 I knew my life would just go downhill from there. And I was totally
right! And, guess what? Despite everyone always going on about how
natural it is, I HATE IT!!! I'm an atheist but if I were religious I'd
hate my god/goddess for cursing me and taking so much of my life away
from me. No offense to religious people, just my opinion. I don't despise
men but I envy them every second of my life. When I hear women going on
about the beauty of their cycle I don't know whether to laugh hysterically or
cry bitterly. Although I've never experienced PMS or any pain
since my menarche, it has been my greatest wish for years to stop the damn
thing forever. I mean, what did I do to deserve so many ruined ski-trips,
summer vacations, sports events etc.etc.? I only found out about ways to suppress
menstruation recently and while I'm aware of the possible drawbacks, I
DON'T CARE!!! I want to have kids some day but nothing is worth this constant
humiliation so I'd even sacrifice that if necessary. Pills, hysterectomy,
weight-gain, pimples, damage to bone density- just bring it on
and LIBERATE ME ONCE AND FOR GOOD!! Before coming across this site,
I never knew that there were women who felt as strongly (and
negatively) about this as I do, and now I finally don't feel alone
anymore thanks to some brilliant comments on these pages.
July 2006
American 13-year-old: "When I begin to bleed . . . and I read
the comments of others I know that I am the same as most every other woman.
It's some kind of reassurance."
I would not stop my period if I could. I have only had to deal
with it since last November, and I am not one of the lucky few who get
them light. It has caused me no small amount of stress, worry, and pain,
but in some strange way I look forward to it each month, even though it's
painful and has destroyed several pairs of underwear, a pair of shorts,
and a leather jacket (Yes, a jacket. It's a bit of a long story.)
I think in some way I feel like it is a bond with all women, one of
my few assurances that I'm normal. In terms of personality and outlook
on life I have a tendency to believe I am drastically different from everyone
else. When I begin to bleed, however, and I read the comments of others
I know that I am the same as most every other woman. It's some kind of
reassurance.
I am actually on it now and this time it means cramps, back pain, and
leg fatigue. Today is a day where I feel I should have stayed in bed. I
have had only 5 hours of sleep, woke up at 6:30, am in pretty much constant
pain, have tripped over a puppy gate, spilled half a box of dry pasta,
and fell asleep on the couch and woke up to the dog having made a mess.
My period assures me that I am healthy and similar to half of the earth's
population. I want to have children one day. I would certainly not mind
putting a halt to this particular cycle, but I would not stop my cycles
altogether if I could.
13, Ohio
July 2006
Yes. "People take plenty of other medications that alter their
bodies without thinking twice."
I am a 43-year-old from the U.S. who has had her periods now for 33
years! I'm writing this from home due to missing yet another day from work
because of my periods. Today it is flooding that is the problem. I had
my tubes tied 11 years ago, and the doctor at that time refused to do a
hysterectomy or oophorectomy [removal of the ovaries] to stop my periods,
saying I was "too young." I have ruined clothes, furniture, even
seats in a theater after a surprise showing. My family and I can't plan
trips, because it comes as it sees fit - two weeks, three weeks, six weeks,
and can stick around for 3-10 days. My last doctor removed me from his
service because I was on the phone crying last month (from home again)
needing some kind of help and he refused me. I am now doctor shopping for
someone to help. I really can't take this much longer. I am going to lose
my job, and I'm the only source of income for our family.
This doesn't make me feel like a woman. It makes me feel dirty, like
hiding all day. I feel like a woman when I can put on a pretty dress, not
worry it'll get stained, and be intimate with my husband. I feel like a
woman if my husband can hug me without me squinching from the pain of tender
breasts. People take plenty of other medications that alter their bodies
without thinking twice. They pop Ritalin into their kids' mouths like candy.
I just want freedom from this chain around my body. The bloating, the pain
(which I had LONG before I ever heard of PMS), I wake up from a sound sleep
in agony. I want OFF this ride.
If menstruation were really essential for humans to live, men would
do it too. Quite frankly, if men did it, it would have been OUTLAWED years
ago!!! [Gloria Steinem might agree - read her views on "If
Men Could Menstruate"]
June 2006
"I don't want to keep going on for the rest of my life like this
never knowing what's going to happen because my periods come when they get
ready and not one but two and three times."
I'm still a young woman (age 29) who is going through so much with this
female problem. I have complication after complication with my menstruation.
Yeah, one of the problems is bleeding heavily but the main problem is have
a period 2 to 3 times a month for 6 days each. No spotting here and there
but flowing like the Mississippi River - CRAMPING LIKE HELL. Every time
I have a period I have outrageous cramps that I take prescription medication
for and this lasts for 3 days.
So to the person who is horrified because there are some women who want
to have their periods stop: I have no clue what's going on with you but
I couldn't care less how long this been around. Some of us have it harder
than others but this is one thing I prefer not to have. I don't want to
keep going on for the rest of my life like this never knowing what's going
to happen because my periods come when they get ready and not one but two
and three times. If there's a pill out there that will stop me from having
periods, I will take it without looking back. For the ones who are wondering,
I have two kids and will not have another one, so the miracle pill I will
take in a heartbeat.
[Later, she added:]
FOR THE ONE WHO SAID SHE LIKED HAVING PERIODS BECAUSE THEY LET HER KNOW
THAT SHE'S NOT PREGNANT, I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU: YOU CAN STILL HAVE PERIODS
AND BE PREGNANT AT THE SAME TIME. THE BEST THING FOR YOU IS USE CONDOMS
AND STOP DEPENDING ON YOUR PERIODS TO COME SO YOU CAN REASSURE YOURSELF
THAT YOU'RE NOT PREGNANT.
I WAS PREGNANT WITH MY LAST CHILD AND HAD A PERIOD FOR THREE MONTHS.
WHAT MAKES IT SO BAD IS THAT MY PERIODS WERE AWFUL. I WAS FLOWING HEAVILY,
CRAMPING TO THE POINT WHERE I COULDN'T WALK, AND TAKING PRESCRIPTION MEDICATION
FOR THE PAIN. BY THE GRACE OF GOD, MY DAUGHTER CAME OUT PERFECT. WHEN MY
PERIOD FINALLY STOPPED, I TOOK A PREGNANCY TEST AND IT CAME OUT POSITIVE.
WHEN I WENT TO THE DOCTOR AND GOT AN ULTRASOUND, I WAS ALREADY 4 MONTHS
PREGNANT. SO AGAIN TO THE PERSON WHO IS DEPENDING ON HER PERIOD: PLEASE
STOP AND START PROTECTING YOURSELF!!!!!!!!
June 2006
Yes. "Enough is enough"
"I bleed for 14 days straight and stop for 5 then bleed 14 more
days. This had been for the last 8 years and I am sick of it. Apparently
it is hormonal but enough is enough. I never want a period ever again."
June 2006
"I can't help but wonder if it is the result of the garbage being
fed to girls and women nowadays, the garbage that says: 'try
to suppress your femaleness as much as you can.'"
I've been menstruating since I was almost nine years old and I would
never purposely stop my period. The only time that no period is okay with
me is when I am pregnant (or in the future when I hit menopause). I think
it is very unhealthy that women are messing with their bodies to such extent
these days. No one knows what effects these hormones and pills are going
to have ten years from now, or thirty, for fifty, no matter how much the
drug companies try to convince us otherwise. I would much rather let my
reproductive system do what nature designed and perfected it for! To me,
it represents an important phase in my womanhood, as well as my wonderful
ability to bear children. In short, I feel that it is a gift.
I find it very sad that so many women "hate" their periods
and are so eager to stop it. I can't help but wonder if it is the result
of the garbage being fed to girls and women nowadays, the garbage that
says: "try to suppress your femaleness as much as you can." In
the past, women were held back because of their gender. Nowadays, we're
held back unless we want to leave our femininity at the door. We are still
being molded by others' ideals, only now it has been repackaged as something
"desirable."
Our bodies were made to bleed every month for a reason. Normally, when
a woman of childbearing age stops menstruating and she isn't pregnant,
it means she is sick or something is wrong. It is dangerous and shallow
to change years of evolution for the sake of "convenience."
June 2006
"No! I like knowing when I'm not pregnant."
No way! I don't mind having my period. I think women have periods for
a reason other than the fact that it enables us to get pregnant. I would
never get rid of my period on purpose. At least not for a long time. It's
OK to suppress it because you may be going on a trip and don't want the
hassle of having your period - but to suppress it forever? No! I like knowing
when I'm not pregnant. I'm not saying I look forward to it every month
but I'm very comfortable with having a period. It's what makes us special
;^)
June 2006
No. "It HORRIFIES me how some women just casually say yes to
putting hormones and other foreign things into their body to stop this natural
process."
Hi, I'm writing in response to your question "Would You Stop Menstruating
If You Could?"
My answer is no.
Why change something that has been around for as long as millions of
years, as long as the history of mankind? Menstruation is purely natural
and in my opinion, it is NOT good to interfere with a natural process in
your body. It HORRIFIES me how some women just casually say yes to putting
hormones and other foreign things into their body to stop this natural
process. It's just like telling the world to stop turning, telling the
seasons to stop changing, if you get what I'm saying.
However, I fully respect other women's decisions to stop their menstruation
IF they are having severe problems with their monthly cycle. I had a friend
who had terrible PMS and cramps, and my cousin told me that her aunt (from
another side) often fainted when she had her menstruation because they
were very painful. I don't have a wide knowledge of menstrual disorders,
but I know that they can really affect some women's lives.
Ok, so I'm moody, I'm bloated, my back hurts, I have cramps, my appetite
is increased, I'm tired, and sometimes I'm anaemic when I have my period.
So you see I'm not one of those people who have cramp-free, pain-free,
fuss-free periods. It's annoying but it's only for a few days out of the
whole month. This might sound freakishly weird but I love my period. Yes,
let me repeat that, I love my period. I have terrible cramps and I wear
pads, so it's always pretty messy and tiring for me. But there's just something
relieving and calming about getting my monthly period. It reminds me that
I'm still functioning, that I'm still alive, I'm still a woman, and it
reassures me of who I am. It brings a sense of 'normality' and 'regularity'
to me.
I've read a lot of comments saying how tiresome and messy and inconvenient
it is to have periods. My question is, have you tried ALL different ways
to make your period more comfortable? Are you wearing the most convenient
type of pads/tampons/cups? For example, if you know that pads aren't working
for you and you would leak out at night when you're sleeping, why don't
you try the other alternatives? If you have severe cramps why don't you
try massaging the area or even Google some PMS-relieving activities? Do
you have a healthy lifestyle? I know this won't work for ALL of you out
there but have you even tried to 'improve' the quality of your period?
I read a lot of comments about how people make a mess every time their
period comes because it's unpredictable. With most women, the menstruation
cycle IS predictable. Make a note about when your last period is, and ALWAYS
bring a tampon/pad/whatever wherever you go around the date of your last
period. I'm never caught off guard now since I always carry a pad around.
It's all about planning and prevention. I'm surprised about how some people
haven't thought about this at all.
Lastly, learn to love your body and who you are as a woman, stop comparing
yourself to the 'comfort' and the 'easiness' of men's lives because WE
ARE DIFFERENT. I am absolutely horrified when I read comments like "I
hate my uterus," menstruation is "disgusting" and "unwanted,"
or any comments that indicate that expresses hate towards their own bodies
just because it's inconvenient for them. Please.
And no, this is not coming from a 60-year-old menopausal woman who does
not have to suffer the woes of the menstrual cycle anymore. I'm 18, and
I have had my period for 6 years and so far, it has been a unique experience
for me.
So I suggest to all of you who are considering stopping their menstrual
cycles: Ask yourself,
Is it really safe to stop this all natural cycle which has existed ever
since mankind was born (well, supposedly)?
What am I really putting inside my body and what does it REALLY do?
Don't just say yes for convenience's sake.
How bad is my PMS and how has it affected my daily life? Is it life-threatening?
Is it that serious?
Am I really suffering from PMS? Is it just a psychological thing? (e.g
I didn't have PMS AT ALL until I heard about it. I swear.)
How would I feel if I suddenly stopped menstruating? Would I lose my
'identity'? Would I be comfortable?
Have I done all the things that could improve my comfort during my period?
Exercise? Types of pads/tampons? Natural remedies?
Thanks for reading my opinion and I'm sorry if I hurt anybody's feelings.
I'm Asian but I moved to Melbourne, Australia and have been living there
for 3 years.
Thanks!
June 2006
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