Would you stop menstruating if you could? (scroll down for responses)

In March and April, 2000, several articles and comments appeared (including in the New Yorker magazine - read that whole article for free - The Lancet medical journal, and the Guardian newspaper, and in many places since then) about the benefits of stopping menstruation. The inspiration is mainly the book Is Menstruation Obsolete? (read some excerpts), by Brazilian Dr. Elsimar Coutinho, with Dr. Sheldon Segal (Oxford University Press, 1999), which argues that the benefits far outweigh any problems. (Kathleen O'Grady reviews the book.) The work of Beverly Strassmann, of the University of Michigan [U.S.A.], who has studied the menstrual customs of the Dogon people of Africa for years - they use menstrual huts - also supports the argument for fewer periods.
Another Brazilian physician, Dr. Nelson Soucasaux, opposes uninterrupted use of hormonal contraceptives for menstrual suppression (July 2001).
In August 2000 Barr Laboratories announced that it was trying to get approval for Seasonale, birth-control pills packaged to take for 90 days at a time, so a woman would menstruate only once every three months. A year later, in the journal Human Reproduction, a study reported that rhesus macaque monkeys stopped menstruating after their progesterone receptors were blocked, and started up again when the blocker-drug was no longer given (see MUM news for 26 August 2001).
And in March, 2001, a play in New York City, Even the Queen, treats this theme (see the MUM news for 11 March 2001).
What do YOU think? Would you stop menstruating indefinitely - for years - if you could start up again easily if you wanted a child? Put your comments with the ones below. No need to add your name or address, but writing your age might give a hint of generational differences, and it would be informative to give your nationality or part of the country. (Some writers, below, have allowed their names, etc., to be included.)

Don't worry if your English is not perfect; I sometimes correct grammar and spelling, but I don't change the meaning of your comments.


Below are your e-mail comments, March - August 2001. (I count 98 on this page). Add yours!


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Leer la versión en español de los siguientes temas: Anticoncepción y religión, Breve reseña - Olor - Religión y menstruación - Seguridad de productos para la menstruación.

Comic strip: A conservative American family visits the (future) Museum of Menstruation

CONTRIBUTE to Humor, Words and expressions about menstruation and Would you stop menstruating if you could?
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It is a pain:

I'm 13 and I've only been menstruating for a couple of months but it is a pain. Why have it? I'm not going to have kids any time soon. I get really bad cramps - sometimes the pain is so bad I throw up - and anemic because I have a really heavy flow. I can't wear khakis when I have it, and I hate having to spend so much money on pads, tampons, and extra underwear.

August 2001


Menstruation - the primordial goo - unites women

I'm 17 right now, and I had my menses at age 13. I used to wish for menopause. Honestly, menstruating each month can be a big pain - it can get annoying. But deep down, I have nothing but respect for it. My menstruation humbles me, it's like the primordial goo of possible life is flowing from me.

I think it's a unifying occurrence for the women of the world. I wouldn't give it up for anything.

August 2001


She's on friendly terms with her period:

I am 23, and have been menstruating now for 12 years, and I cannot ever remember a time when I wished I didn't menstruate. Not only would I not stop menstruating, I would do it more often if I could.

I envy the women I know who have perfectly regular, clockwork periods. It's one of the few reliable things in this world. Every time I get my period I thank heaven I'm not pregnant, and that I can become pregnant if I want to, and that I was born female, and that my reproductive organs are self-cleaning.

I feel sorry for women who hate their periods, because to me it is a wonderful reminder of my femininity. I only wish we had menstrual huts [see one in Hawaii] in our culture. (It's true there are some inconveniences associated with menstruation - I know I am very lucky not to suffer from serious cramps or mood swings - but then Margaret Mead's anthropological work demonstrated that many of these symptoms are culturally determined.)

In short, I am on very friendly terms with my "monthly visitor" and wouldn't trade it for the world.

August 2001



She wants to stop but remain able to get pregnant:

["I saw this June letter (below)"]:"I am curious: do women who use tampons tend to have worse periods than pad or cup users? It seems that the heaviest bleeders have mentioned tampons, but it's not clear whether that's cause or effect. [I don't know - does anybody?]

I'm 15 and only started my period at late 13. I find that if I use tampons my period goes quicker.

I think that if I could get rid of my period, but still be able to get pregnant I would stop. It often gets in the way of a few things, although I've never really suffered from any of the symptoms. My friends are all jealous of me for this, and I'll listen to them moan each month and be thankful, but still, if I could lose it I think I would.

Thanks for the site. I think it's great. I find it hard to talk about stuff to other people and this makes me feel a lot more on my own.

August 2001


"What do I think? Eve should never have eaten that apple!" she entitles her e-mail:

At 33, my period is more aggravating than anything else. I live in a humid area of the U.S. and summers are the worst. I hate when it becomes irregular - I mean if it's going to happen at least it could be on time.

And cravings? Chocolate never tasted better right before my cycle. I do like having something to blame my moods and crying jags on. It makes for a great excuse to be a total witch. I'd rather have a week of this discomfort than to be a man.

August 2001

A Yugoslavian writes,

No, no, no.

I am a 30-year-old married woman from Yugoslavia, a mother of four beautiful daughters. To be honest, I am shocked by so many responses of women who absolutely hate menstruation and absolutely never want to be mothers. I believe in total sexual abstinence outside of marriage and so never had worries about birth-control. I am also ready to have more children, if God decides to send them, since I believe they are a great blessing from Him. Pregnancies and breast-feeding decrease the amount of menstruation and, in my experience, they also drastically decreased their length and the pain involved. I believe we were created to have children and having them blesses us in this way also. I would never have a hysterectomy or my tubes tied by choice (unless it would be a life-saving necessity), because it's part of who I am and how my body works.

Besides, taking some "time out" during menstruation gives me the time to spiritually recharge and give my body the rest it needs. I am a wife, a mother and a homemaker and I love it! I feel very sad for those who can't accept it.

August 2001


Hurrah for hysterectomy!

I am 50 now, living in NW England and had a hysterectomy 13 years ago. It was the best thing that ever happened to me. I would recommend it to anyone..

During the years when I was menstruating, I suffered every associated problem known to womankind. Deep depression (made worse by knowing it would go away and be back next time), irregular, sometimes painful periods, bloating, flooding, clots, pain, headaches, nausea, fatigue, mood swings, loss of appetite, weight fluctuations. If I missed anything, don't worry, I still had it. After the hysterectomy my general health improved dramatically. So did my energy levels. There is no way I could do the job I do now if I still had periods.

But the best thing of all, is that now I've hit fifty and am supposed to be menopausal - I have never had a hot flush or any of the other distressing symptoms.

My advice is, if you have the opportunity, get rid.

August 2001


Maybe, maybe not:

Reasons why I might consider it:

1. It puts the kibosh on my sex life for 5-7 days a month;

2. Food cravings;

3. Ruined underwear;

4. Always having to carry a purse with pads, tampons,

and quarters just in case my "monthly visitor" shows up;

5. Mood swings, which affect my relationships with people and my productivity at work;

6. Gas and constipation;

7. My dog gets inordinately interested in my crotch on those days. [Read some odor concerns, including with bears.]

Reasons why I would not want to stop:

1. It's reassuring to know that I'm not pregnant;

2. I have chronic pelvic pain, which actually *subsides* during my period;

3. My periods have actually become easier as I've gotten older (I'm 26 and started menstruating at 11 1/2) - lighter flow, no cramps, more regular cycles;

4. Any symptom that I have that is due to my period can be controlled with diet, exercise, supplements, therapy, sleep, or just taking it easy;

5. Strange as it sounds, it's a part of my identity as a woman - every woman alive has had a period, and every girl that is born eventually will.

My mom (a Registered Nurse) started talking to me about menstruation when I was around nine; I was an early bloomer physically, so she suspected I might start menstruating early as well. She had a positive attitude about it and reminded me that every woman goes through it and it's perfectly healthy. On the day I got my period, I told her and she bought me a little gold pin with a purple crystal. I was proud, and I still feel some of that pride every 29 days.

There are days when I jokingly tell my mom, who is now going through menopause, that I'll gladly trade her my bleeding for her hot flashes, but most days I wouldn't give it up.

August 2001


Yes,

I would definitely give up menstruating if I could still have children. (I am 21). Why? Oh, so many reasons:

1. My period last forever. I bleed for at least five days and spot for at least three more. I have tried various different types of birth control that my friends say made them have three-day periods, but nothing has helped.

2. My period interrupts half my life. Since I am on the Pill, so I get it every 28 exactly. With eight-day periods, three days of PMS, and at least one day afterwards to get back to normal, almost two weeks out of every four are taken up with menstrual mania.

3. PMS: I cry, I hurt, I yell, I eat, I sleep. A lot of everything.

4. Sex: Yanking tampons out before and leaping up right afterwards to put on in just destroys the mood. Also, no matter how careful or quick you are, the sheets get a little stained.

5. Heredity: My mother finally went through menopause at 56. That means I have 36 more years. Help.

August 2001

The 22-year-old American adds a comment (read two items below):

I see people writing about how ''natural'' a period is and how God gave it to us so it must be necessary. God also gave us hair on our legs and armpits, but we seem to get rid of that! Isn't hair natural?

August 2001


Yes:

I am 16 years old. I hate my period. I'm grouchy through the whole time it last. I hate wearing pads, but I've never tried wearing a tampon. My cramps start the minute my period starts. I usually cramp on and off till the last day. My period last about six days. I play basketball, and it's horrible running down a court when you have on a pad. I'm always worrying about leaks. Every time I run, it feels like I'm going to throw up or something. I always get my period around special occasions. I absolutely hate my period!

July 2001


Yes:

I am a 22-year-old American. I would definitely stop menstruating. In fact, I'm going to continue taking my birth control pills, and skipping the sugar pills and continuing a new pack right away, to prevent menstruating. I think it's ridiculous that I've heard people say, "It reminds me that I am a woman." I know that I am a woman, regardless of whether I bleed every month or not.

The fact that I have two breasts and a vagina says enough. And so after menopause, you're not a woman anymore because you don't bleed?

Although my period is pretty light now because I am on the Pill, I will still never forget the agony and pain I used to go through with it. And I don't want to have to wear a pad or have my period during work, on a vacation or during a social event.

This is just my opinion. I enjoyed reading the others.

July 2001



A 16-year-old writes,

Most definitely not!

I love my period more than anything. It stands there as a reminder to me of all the amazing things my body can do, like birth a child.

July 2001


"I'd give it up gladly to someone who wants it."

Yes. I hate it. I'm 15, and I got it when I was 11, I think. My cycles are still somewhat irregular, but they last forever: five days with normal bleeding and almost the same amount of time with tiny bits of blood. For a third of the month I'm bundled up with humongous pads hoping that nothing bleeds through and people don't think I've been stuffing things down my pants. I especially don't like tampons: I'm a small person and they never go in completely. Plus, they always hurt going in - today I used Vaseline and I almost wanted to cry, because that was the first time it didn't hurt. But I can't walk normally with a tampon because it's almost a guarantee that it's going to pop out. I get horrible cramps so that I don't even want to move even after taking period medicine. Plus, it always comes at the most inconvenient times: right around all the holidays, even my birthday! I could live without this, and I'd give it up gladly to someone who wants it.

July 2001


No, in spite of the pain:

I'm 36 years old and have been menstruating since I was 11. I would gladly give up the pain of my periods, which has become worse and worse as the years go by, but I would hate to give up my period itself, even though I have no children and do not desire any, because my dreams are so vivid when I am bleeding. I have had a lot of training in Native and Celtic spirituality regarding the spiritual aspects of a woman's moontime, and I enjoy my period itself as a time of cleansing, honoring my femininity and the intense contact with Spirit through my dreams. I would hate to give all that up. I would miss it.

July 2001

A woman with bipolar disorder, from Oregon (U.S.A.), writes Yes:

I am 26 years old and I never want to have children. I don't (and have never over the last 13 years) had a regular period, so it doesn't tell me whether I'm pregnant or not. I have to keep pregnancy tests around the house, and if I don't have my period for three months in a row, I have to take progesterone for several days and it makes me into the biggest (w)itch. I have bipolar disorder and the mood swings I have during PMS (about a week long ) are faster, more unpredictable, and worse than my 'normal' state. Every time I have PMS, I gain one full clothing size since I am short. Since PMS plus period (and the weight) lasts for 14 days, I have to keep an extra set of clothes. And as a jogger, I get embarrassed when dogs run after me. [Read an article on bears and menstruation.]

I can't take the Pill - it makes me suicidal and drives my cholesterol up. It seems really unnatural to me to take the Pill; it does other weird things to my body. It has helped some of my friends have less painful periods, but its not for me.

Maybe if I had a normal period that happened every month and I weren't mentally ill I wouldn't mind, but really, it makes it difficult for me to behave like a rational human being. I don't see it as a part of me or my identity, I see it as an obstacle. I'm really glad I have it infrequently, because otherwise I would be unable to have a normal life.

I am thankful for sex being so much fun during menstruation though! I might miss that a little.

I think it's great for all those who see it as a part of being a woman, and/or what God or the goddess gave them, that's a great attitude. I have health problems and I would rather not have them. I try to take a healthy attitude towards my body and treat it well every day so I can preserve and improve my health.

I wouldn't trade being a woman for anything, but I don't feel like I want to define myself through my periods. I'm so much more than that!

P.S. I wish there were more bidets in America! I was glad to see them on the page [here]. They're awesome.

July 2001

"Damn straight!"

I've had very heavy periods since I was 11 (I'm 32 now) and I'm totally sick of it. I don't understand why anyone would choose to menstruate if there were a real choice.

July 2001


Yes:

Definitely. A hysterectomy sounds better every month. Which is not at all to say my period is worse than the average. I once collapsed on a closet floor in the middle of the night and was convinced I was going to bleed to death, but that's only happened once. Usually, menstruation is simply an annoyance.

I do not like children, and while I believe I could and would be a good mother if the need arose, I do not want to be a mother.

The whole argument that menstruation is "natural" strikes me as grossly ironic. Why don't we just go rip up the roads and knock down our buildings too? They're unnatural. Why don't we all weave our own clothes and boycott industry? Industry is unnatural.

In fact, what say we all just go back to living as groups of hunter-gatherers?

Besides being a little miffed at the "natural" argument, I found the Web page http://report.kff.org/archive/repro/2000/03/kr000317.3.htm most interesting. [Read also the article and book excerpts at the links in the introduction at the top of this Web page.]

It notes that in the past, when we were all "natural," women had LOTS of kids.

This means women did not menstruate nearly as much. Now, instead of menstruating about 100 times in a lifetime, the number has jumped to 350-400. The article also notes that a woman who does not menstruate for 10 years (in this case because she is on the pill) has a 60 percent lower chance of contracting endometrial cancer and 70 percent lower chance of contracting ovarian cancer.

In short:

1. Menstruation is a pain.

2. Menstruating 400 times is NOT "natural."

3. Not menstruating decreases my risk of cancer.

If I'm going to be a glutton for punishment, let me at least suffer for doing something fun like skydiving or hang gliding. If some higher power insists I suffer to maintain my womanhood, I would be quite willing to give it up and be content with simple personhood.

July 2001

Yes,

I hate my period. It's always painful, stresses me out, my number-one priority and I don't want it to be, heavy and messy. As long as I could still conceive a child, I would be perfectly fine without it.

July 2001

Yes,

If I could still have kids? I'm afraid I'll have to say yes to this one.

Not because my periods are horrid - in fact, till these last 3 or 4 years, I never experienced a cramp or a backache. Usually it's just 'woosh' for a few days, then spotting for a few more and then it's finally over.

I'm just very irregular. I've never been able to figure out the sense of humor my uterus obviously must have. Since day one I've never had a period that's been consistent. One month it may be the first week, the next the last. Lately I did get on a schedule when I started going first week of one month, second or third of the next and then the last week of the next month.

But all that just got shot out the window with this 51 day gap between my last period and this one.

I've read all the other posts here and I can say my pains are nowhere -near- as severe as some of you have described. Till the age of 15, most of my periods were pain-free. Then I begin to have cramps, usually lasting the first couple of days of the period. And gas, absolutely horrid gas. Next came PMS, having me angry for a few days and then weepy for the next. Of course this was topped off by bloating.

This was all fine and good . . . till this period. I'd never felt ovulation pains till now. And I couldn't sleep one evening for my severe cramps. And still, I'm not bleeding, merely spotting.

I don't know yet if I do or do not want children. But if I could stop menstruating - and suffer no ill effects from it - I most happily would.

July 2001


Bring it on! writes a Viennese:

Never! I would like to have more of it!

I am an 32-year-old woman from Vienna, Austria, and I have two daughters, 10 and 13 years old.

My first thought when I started menstruating al 11 was, Now I am able to bear babies. I have always loved it, even when I wanted to get pregnant.

When my menstruation announces herself I plan the following days: nothing to do and enjoy it. I love the feeling when blood and parts of tissue run out of my body. I do then press for more blood and tissue parts. And when a handful of bloody tissue streams through my little lips I am only happy.

I never had cramps, PMS, mood swings or any other troubles during my menstruations, but I always feel very relaxed so that I can sleep very well.

I think that women who have problems with their menstruation actually look for a reason to hate their femaleness. They do not want to be women.

July 2001

A writer from Alabama (U.S.A.) says,

I would definitely not stop menstruating. I love when my moon time comes each month. I used to have very painful periods until I developed a more healthy attitude about it and stopped viewing it as "the curse." Before, it took heavy prescription meds to ease my pain, but now I can control it with herbal remedies and ibuprofen. Moon time helps me feel connected to the cyclical nature of my body and the world.

July 2001


No:

I don't think I'd want to stop menstruating. Actually if my periods were painless and low-flow now as they were when I was on birth-control pills that would be wonderful. However, in November 1993, I started getting migraines and since having migraines and being on the Pill made me a high risk for stroke, I'm no longer allowed to be on the Pill. Since I stopped taking the Pill in 1994, every period has been so painful I'm bedridden 1-2 days every period with extremely heavy bleeding that pours out of me. I fear I'll wake in a pool of blood and that has happened - bleeding right through sanitary napkins.

I hate it when people are like, "You just have cramps" or "You're on the rag." The pain feels like hot knives stabbing inside my uterus and hot pain in my lower back and down my legs. I had my tubes tied in 1995 because condoms and IUDs irritated my vagina. At the time I had thought by getting the tubal ligation I'd have no more periods but I was misinformed. Acupuncture and lowering the stress in my life along with supplements and dietary changes like no more caffeine or NutraSweet has lessened the pain but I miss the days of being on the Pill when my periods were a pleasant reminder of being female. I bled lightly and had no symptoms other than a little bloating in the belly and breasts which was appealing in a way.

I'm 34 years old, live in a rural area in New York, and will continue my search for a natural way to diminish my suffering. I use Natracare tampons and sanitary napkins. I don't need to get sick from dioxin and other dangerous chemicals in commercial feminine "protection" products.

July 2001


From a 15-year-old girl in California: Probably not

As I was going through the responses, I realized that most women who would get rid of their period had terribly excruciating ones. Maybe if mine was worse, I would wish it away as well, but for the time being, I really don't mind it.

I personally got mine when I was 11 years and 1 month (the accuracy is only important because my mother got it at the EXACT same age) during a study hall at school. My mother had told me that this was going to happen, so I was pretty calm about it. I just excused myself to the bathroom, went to the nurse, got a couple of pads, and have been fine ever since.

I am comfortable with my period. I get a backache the day before and painful cramps on the second day (thank the Lord for Advil), and I cry easily that week. It lasts for 8 days (what a pain!).

A lot of my friends are guys, and when they accidentally stumble across a pad in my bag, they're kind of surprised when I'm NOT embarrassed. I don't see why I should be. I'm a girl, I menstruate, get over it.

My period is just a fact of life. But if other women don't want theirs, hey, it's not my body.

July 2001


Yes!

I am almost 33 years old and I have never wanted children. In fact, I want my tubes tied, but I can't find any doctor who will do it. I would definitely stop menstruating. I have no reason to.

July 2001

"Yes, definitely yes"

I'm 14 and my periods started when I was 12 and I'm telling you I would love to stop having periods. Mine are irregular and painful when they come, so, yes, I would give them up.

July 2001

A woman from Shropshire, England, writes,

Probably not.

I was on the Pill from the ages of nearly 17 until I was 25 and have never felt freer since I stopped taking it. It was convenient, though, as it meant that I could time my cycle around events such as holidays.

The main thing as a woman you are never told about taking chemical contraception is what it does to your cycles - as a young girl (I was one of the first to start my periods at 11, and I'm 32 now) I had cycles so regular I could have set my clock by them. Once I stopped taking the Pill, my first cycle was 40 days long, which nearly killed me with suspense! My cycles now vary in length, but at least there's some sort of pattern!

I don't mind it, it reminds me that I'm a woman. I now use cloth pads [see some] which are much more comfortable than disposable ones and I'm sure that my periods have become shorter since I started using them! I wouldn't go quite as far as celebrating this event, but I wouldn't necessarily give it up at the moment!

July 2001


"YES!"

Just because, by chance, I was born a female does not mean that I have to or should have children. I believe the same applies to menstruation. If I don't want to menstruate, I believe it should be my choice - after all, this is MY body.

I am 23 years old, and have always suffered from cramps and depression and other maladies around my period. But it kept getting worse. Last September, I had had a major engineering midterm [examination in school]. I had just gotten my period. I felt so ill. It doesn't matter how much Pamprin I take. I did so poorly on the exam, I ended up barely passing the class. I felt too sick to drive home or even move. So I sat in the cafeteria, getting sicker. It got so bad I was looking for someone I knew to take me to the emergency room.

And then all of a sudden it was gone. It came back an hour or so later, but not as bad. I ended up realizing that my normal way of dealing with this CURSE, which was to dose up on sleeping pills for two days and to hope I had no big tests coming up, was not going to work. I am a diabetic, so my options are more limited - I am not supposed to go on the Pill. I started on DepoProvera. It took away my period and PMS, BUT for the last nine months I've been on it I've been spotting constantly. I'll do anything to get rid of my period, but this is still rather annoying. I would really like to try Seasonale or maybe just go to a butcher shop. I hate kids - with a passion.

July 2001

"YES!!! YES!!! YES!!!"

I am a 24-year-old woman. I started getting my period three months before my sixteenth birthday. I couldn't wait to get it, I thought that it would make me a woman. What I realized when I got it is that nothing could me more unfeminine that having to walk around in what feels like a diaper. I never could bring myself to put in a tampon and I spent seven years, for six days every twenty days, constantly wondering if I had spots on the back of my pants. I did not have the horrible experiences some other woman here have described but I did always get frequent, heavy periods with bad (but not severe) cramps. It ruined every vacation and most summers. Going for a gynecological exam is what kept me from taking the Pill but two years ago I found a doctor who was willing to give it to me with no exam and give me enough Pills that I could take it consecutively. I cannot say that it has solved all of my problems but it is one less problem and I will never go back to getting my period again.

July 2001

She doesn't hesitate:

I would say a big Fat YES. I am a 16-year old and I have suffered for the past 4 years with ridiculously heavy periods, severe cramps, weight gain, irregularity, PMS, and just plain hell. I feel cheated out of life sometimes. I'm definitely thinking about asking my doctor about some sort of solution. It's just plain ridiculous sometimes.

July 2001

A German says . . .

I'm a 16-year-old girl from Germany and I would never stop menstruating, because it's a part of me. Never.

July 2001



A 50-year-old kept her uterus in the freezer - well, read on!:

Yes!

I had a hysterectomy five years ago and must say I haven't missed that monthly event at all!

I was able to rescue my uterus from medical disposal, kept it in an ice cream tub in my freezer (in the summer) and on the back deck in the winter for a few years. I finally did bury my uterus out in my back yard (after my partner got sick of dealing with it in the freezer, especially after it tipped over and leaked out a little) with my four-year-old niece and we go visit it periodically when she comes over and wants to see where we buried it.

But miss my period? No way. It is one of the blessings of maturity and menopause along with being much warmer in general and getting vengeance on my partner for all those years when we fought over the heat control in the car. I now tell him, "It's not cold." [!]

June 2001


No, it's necessary:

No. I'm an 18-year-old American and I feel that if it wasn't necessary, God wouldn't have given it to us. Women should accept it as a part of life because that's what it is.

June 2001

A gymnast writes,

Yes. I most definitely would stop menstruating if I could. I am a competitive gymnast, and it's a drag when I have it during competitions. I am 12 years old, and just started, but don't want to continue.

Since I have stopped using disposable pads, and switched to cloth pads, it hasn't been as bad,but I still hate it.

Disposable pads tend to chafe, and smell unbelievably strong when used. I am also concerned about the environment which is the main reason I have stopped using disposable pads.

I occasionally use tampons, but only when cloth pads are not an option, like for swimming. In gymnastics competitions, it could slip out of place,so I use a tampon then.

I would love to stop menstruating, but then again, I have heard about nasty side effects from such things.

June 2001


"No, thank you, to menstruating!"

I am 35 and have been taking the same pill for 20 years - Ortho Novum 1/35.

I swear by it. I cannot remember if my periods ceased immediately after I began taking the pill, but for years now, I have not had to deal with bleeding, cramps, mood swings, etc. I may occasionally have sore breasts and a little bloating, but I never bleed.

I consider myself very blessed and I attribute my almost always sunny disposition to the fact that I don't have to go through the once a month agony of menstruating. I sympathize for those women who do. Especially because of the mood swings that menstruating can cause. That to me would be even worse than the bleeding.

A few months ago, I went to see my doctor for my yearly visit. He didn't have my ON135 so he gave me a sample of pills that were "very similar."

Right after that, my health insurance plan changed and the cost of my pills increased significantly. I took the pills that my doctor gave me and then began taking the generic version of ON135. Bad idea!!! I could not understand what was happening to me. I would tear up at the drop of a hat, and found myself to be very snappy and edgy, and I guess, depressed. It was noticed by many, especially by my (male) boss and my boyfriend. They were baffled. I went through this for about three months before it finally hit me as to what might be the problem. One month after going back to the ON135, I was back to my old self. Psychological? I mean, after all, aren't the generic pills exactly the same? I swear not.

Maybe after 20 years of the same little pill being absorbed by my system, it prefers nothing but. I remember discussing this "personal" issue with a group of people at a cocktail party a few years back. They were amazed that I never had a period.

One of the "men" in the discussion commented that it was "unnatural" for me to never bleed and couldn't be good for me. After all, how else does the female body flush itself if not through menstruation. My father was concerned about it also, and after my first pregnancy ended with a miscarriage, he stated concern about the fact that I had been on the Pill for so many years. Couldn't that be the problem? He didn't realize that women can now test for pregnancy the day after conception and that 1 out of 3 pregnancies end in a miscarriage. Three months later, I was pregnant again. I had no idea when I was ovulating because I never had a period, but I got pregnant for the second time with no problem. And what an easy pregnancy I had. I went into labor three weeks early and was so far dilated by the time I reached the hospital that I ended up having my baby in two hours with no drugs.

I remember watching my cousin doubled up in the bed for two days a month unable to "play" with me because she was in such agony during her menstrual cycle that I feared the day I became a "woman." She went through endometriosis most of her life. She had tissue scarring, was unable to have the third baby that she wanted, and eventually had a partial hysterectomy.

I feel there are too many benefits to NOT menstruating.

June 2001


A 27-year-old says,

Yes.

If it meant I could still have kids I would. I've had excruciating cramps and pain since my very first one. Once I bled so heavily for two weeks I was tasting metal and was weak and ill. I have always missed one day of school or work due to how ill it would make me. I didn't know what to do. I had been on the Pill for 5 years, but stopped thinking perhaps that was too long. But while I was on it, it was heaven! I finally knew when it was coming and everything was fine for once. I went off it for a few months again. No period for the whole summer! What bliss! Then I went back on the Pill for six months. I am off the Pill again and now I never know when it's coming. I got my period every two weeks over the course of 1 1/2 months. Misery. Lately, I've been getting accompanying migraines so bad I throw up. I don't hate my period, just how it makes me physically feel.

June 2001

A 25-year-old Mexican-American writes, "YES!!!":

One, my period has been living hell for me since day one. I've been diagnosed with endometriosis, PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome) and dysmenorrhea.

I've been on the Pill for 5 years - do you think my period has gotten better? Nope. Last month it lasted 13 days. This month it started 3 days early. I've been depressed to the point of suicide, so I went to a psychiatrist, who put me on Prozac - did that help? Nope.

At the age of 13 I was begging my mom to get a hysterectomy, I was in so much pain. I was in so much pain that I would pass out. My husband finally made me see a doctor; that's when I got the diagnoses, but they diagnosed it to no avail.

I think of having children and I truly get sicker than heck, plus I think having children is selfish and disgusting. Especially the socio-implications that having children has, both in the hospital and in society. My worth as a human being, especially a WOMAN human being, is not measured by the amount of babies I can squeeze through my hips. Especially as my heritage so quickly implies.

It's time we start treating the female body as something wonderful, with or without a period. And treating a woman's value on what she does with her life, not how many babies she can pop out.

June 2001


A 31-year-old American says,

Probably not, even though I do not want children, and even though my period is usually inconvenient. I refuse anymore to be embarrassed by it and do not go to any great effort to hide it. Mum.org has been a great help in bolstering my positive attitudes. [Great!]

I've been tracking my cycles since I was 13, and never used chemical birth control, so I know my cycle well and am able to predict onset to within a couple days. I like having an internal clock and barometer of mental and physical health.

I have figured out how to minimize the miserable (thankfully not excessive) effects. Mine include: tender breasts about seven days before onset (lasts about two days), a crying day in the week before onset, plus diarrhea, back ache and cramps during the first two days.

The crying is an opportunity to, between sobs, discuss with my boyfriend things that are bothering me that would not otherwise come up because I'm usually able to shrug them off. I think it helps our relationship in the long run.

The diarrhea is prevented by eating a few bananas the day before and the day of onset (and avoiding apples, corn and curry, of course).

The back ache (and cramping too) is greatly helped by yoga or a chiropractor. Apparently the lumbar vertebrae house nerves with lots of connections to the pelvis. After my first spinal adjustment, my next period was practically symptom-free!

Cramps are my only excuse for spending the day watching movies - they distract me from my belly. More often, I am traveling during the first day, and then I rely on ibuprofen (the second-day pain is tolerable without liver-damaging drugs).

A few times I vomited on the first day, but then realized it was caused by too-tight elastic at my waist.

I am curious: do women who use tampons tend to have worse periods than pad or cup users? It seems that the heaviest bleeders have mentioned tampons, but it's not clear whether that's cause or effect. [I don't know - does anybody?]

June 2001

No:

I am a 30-year-old female who does not have a period for years at a time, not by choice, I might add. I have gone to every doctor and they all tell me I am fine. All my tests come out normal, fine, etc. My husband and I so much want to have children and now we can not without the help of some pills and shots. Women and young girls need to know how important it is for our bodies to do this; it's not as if we are being punished because we are women. We have the greatest gift of all: giving birth and without our cycles we would not be able to do this.

June 2001

A 28-year-old white Texan writes,

In a heart beat. In fact, I did. In January 1995 I started taking DepoProvera and was period free for more than five years. I have been off it for one year now, and have had one "proper" period since. The only reason I went off Depo was it also caused me to have a very low, almost non-existent sex drive. But if I could have a normal libido and no periods? Heaven.

If it were possible for me to get an elective hysterectomy, I would consider it. But I haven't decided if I want a child or not. I know it would be just one, and in the next five years. After that, I'm going to push for one.

Get rid of the whole system!

June 2001


A Norwegian writes, "Yes":

Yes, I would stop menstruating if I could. I'm an 18-year-old girl from Norway.

I say yes, not only because I don't want children, although that's one of the reasons (I KNOW I won't have children, so I don't see the point of this monthly bugger), but it's mainly because I have major cramps. I spend waay too much money each month on sanitary towels/tampons and painkillers and new underwear, new bed sheets, and sometimes even new clothes. And, why should females menstruate and not males? They get off the hook waay too easy!

If it has any relevance, I got my first menstruation when I was 14.

June 2001


YES:

I have had my period since I was nine and even though it has never been a big problem for me with controlling it, I do have serious pain and headache. I'm only 16 and I've been blessed if you want to call it that with two beautiful children, a girl, McKenna, who is 3, and a boy, Ethan, who's three months. If i could give up my period I would as long as I knew there were no side effects and I could still have children in the future if I wished to.

June 2001

NO: A Period Piece by Savannah Skye: Menses Makes Senses:

Well, my feeling to write this short article about the menstrual cycle first came from when I was watching an airing of Fox Family channel's "National Lampoon's Vacation." They silenced out "I got my period" and voiced over "I have to go to the bathroom" during the part when their family station wagon goes over the side. Now I have only one thing to say to Fox Family: Don't they know that in order for a woman to give birth to help create a family, she has to menstruate? Which then hit on in my mind other situations that come up during/around/about this subject of menstruation.

One is that with all this confusion of living today's high-tech, fast-paced world, we women and girls do not need a pill to stop our natural menstrual cycle. I don't remember the name of the pill [Seasonale? See the discussion at the top of the page], but I was watching the news, and they were doing a special segment on a team of men asking women how they would feel about a pill that would stop their menstrual cycle. A few said they would love it, because of PMS and inconvenience, but most of the women said that it's a part of their natural cycle and don't want to interfere with it and that it happens for a reason.

Some of us are darn proud of it and use it as a cycle that enhances our creativity. So why would some men want to come out with a pill to stop a woman's natural cycle of nature that is a gift, not a curse? Well, I don't know, and this writing is to help me remember why we have it, and why nature intended for us to until it ends naturally with menopause. It's another natural phase of a woman's life that needs to be treated with total respect instead of total irreverence.

Secondly, most of us do not need Serafem, which is a medication being hocked by Eli Lilly for symptoms of premenstrual dysphoric disorder PMDD, or severe PMS. Do your homework before taking this medication, because it's a drug - it's really Prozac in disguise. Some doctors say that what Serafem aims to treat - PMDD - doesn't even exist. By their trying to convince us women that we have PMDD, they are making mucho dough off our periods each month.

Then with all the bad examples in the television media in shows such as the X-files and Ally McBeal, it makes some women and girls wonder even more whether it's a curse or a gift. Well, to me it's a gift and not a curse, as my mother's mother said and my mother said to me, but I didn't believe it. I thought and felt otherwise, it's a gift, a gift to all woman that enables us to be co-creators of life. This same feeling I had about getting my period is a feeling that more of teenagers of today's generation have than any other generation preceding this one.

I feel that the teenagers of today are also more informed about the many protective ways to help get them through this bleeding week of life. There are today's traditional disposables, i.e. the tampon or a pad, which you can find made organically. Or you can use the reusable, a cup, sponge or Glad Rags, which makes your menstrual cycle more environmentally friendly.

Last, I have to say that my present PMS has spurred me on to finish this little piece that I started last month. The week before my period I feel an extra creative edge, which lasts through my period as well. So to all you boys as well as men who want to stop the blood flow, what would you have said to Cleopatra when she had seeds to sow and places to go; and to all you women and girls out there, we need to help each other out through this period of our life instead of running from it and covering it up.

June 2001

"What I would change is other people's (mostly male) attitude towards menstruation."

No. I find it interesting to watch the monthly pattern. I've never been at odds with my cycle - no cramps, no bloating. A little breast tenderness and 30 minutes worth of sniffles, but on the whole it just serves to make me more sensitive and in tune with myself. I only bleed for 2 days a month.

What I would change is other peoples (mostly male) attitude towards menstruation. To them it's like a dirty joke or a shame or something. That is awkward to put up with, but it forces me to be calm inside rather than get mad at them. Their insensitivity and ignorance will hurt them more than me.

June 2001


An employee of a large university in the U.S.A. writes,

I would never stop menstruation before my menopausal period. I was on birth control [at age 17] and it almost completely eliminated my flow. I was depressed, I felt PMS-y all the time, and I didn't feel connected to what made me a woman. I felt so disconnected that I started losing pieces of my personality, and I was so hyper-emotional that I cried at Simpsons' episodes [that's a serious situation!].

I feel there are better, less intrusive or harmful ways to prevent pregnancy then to mess with your body's chemistry. I have been using condoms with spermicide exclusively for the past year and I haven't even had a pregnancy scare. Best part about it is I don't feel pregnant, I am not depressed, and I am connected to my natural womanly cycle - the flow and the emotional renewal every month. I am now cycling on the full moon phase as well, which prevents me from having cramps.

A lot of my attitude on menstruation has changed since I read "Her Blood Is Gold" as a teen. Since then, I have had no problems with my menses or the time before it - I've found that a healthy attitude about my body and my menstruation has created a healthy cycle. Certainly a lot of people have problems with their cycle, but the last resort should be tampering with your very delicate chemical balance - doing so only creates more problems that aren't as easily curable as cramps are.

I am 20 years old, and a recent college graduate.

June 2001


"Hey, all women out there! No!" from a Norwegian:

I'm 15 years old, and I'm from Norway. I really hate my periods, (had them for two years) but not enough to want to make them stop - although, during that week, I have to find a way to get out of things like beach trips and physical education and so on. BUT every time my period is irregular and doesn't show up for, like, two weeks, I get worried, because I've heard all my life how menstruation is a part of your body just showing you that you're normal.

So to answer the question: No, I don't think so, but I'd like a way to make it come when it's convenient, and not (like it always does) when we're going on a vacation or something.\

June 2001


Um, "Yes":

WOULD I??!!!!

After 24 years of cramps, flooding my pants, and monthly misery, I finally had a hysterectomy two years ago. It has been HEAVEN!!! I have not missed my tyrannical, demonic, sadistic uterus for a single second. My only regret is that I did not insist my doctor yank my ovaries as well, so that I could go on hormone-replacement therapy and thus be spared the mood swings, breakouts, and changes in hair texture that I still must go through each month. I don't feel any less feminine, and the only things I would do differently would be (a) have my ovaries removed as well and (b) do it at age 13.

Thank you for giving me the chance to have my say!

P.S. For those considering hysterectomy, my personal experience can be found at http://users.supernet.com/jclssl/diary/diarymain.htm

June 2001



"Yes and No":

Yes and No.

Yes, because I hate it. I just hate getting the cramps and bloating every month. I think I hate it the worst in the summer because it gets so uncomfortable when it's real hot.

No, because I would be afraid that something was wrong with me but I wouldn't know if since I don't get my period. I agree with someone who said, "It makes me feel like a woman."

I wish there was a man could get it too or at least feel what it's like. I have a brother who always accuses me of exaggerating. If he got the cramps I get, he wouldn't think so.

June 2001



Yes!

I'm a 23-year-old woman. I've had severe cramps sense my first period. I would love to only have to go through that four times a year!!! How long before this should be on the market? [The company is seeking FDA approval and I'm sure it'll be in the papers when they achieve that.]

June 2001

"Yes! Yes! Yes!"

Sign me Up!

What is normal anyhow? Is it having two periods a month? Bleeding so heavily for the first five days that you go through a large box of the "super" sized tampons? Having cramps so bad they cause you to pass out? Nearly bleeding to death from taking aspirin (it thins the blood) to try to calm the raging migraines? Top it all off with the mood swings from H*LL?

My doctor thought this was all natural and "normal" for a 15-year-old and would do nothing more than make me feel like a weak whiner. Suicidal thoughts, depression, self-destructive habits, fear and anticipation of the pain were the result. I hated my body, I hated my life, I had for 20 years hated being a woman.

I have finally seen the light after taking the Pill for the past three years and have had what I consider tolerable periods. If I could never (or rarely ever) have to go through any of it ever again I would be ever so happy. All that talk about having to bleed and experience one's period to feel like a woman is CR*P! The pain and misery took away all my good feelings about being feminine.

June 2001


"I can hardly believe someone would choose this," she entitled her e-mail:

I tried to list the parts of my body not adversely affected (physically speaking) by my cycle. I could think of none.

However, I read some of these letters and feel I have gotten off easy. I am twenty-seven, and know that I have inherited the genes to be fertile for the next thirty years (my grandmother had her first child at age thirty-four, her last at forty-six, my mother had my sister at almost forty - I have a long way to go until menopause).

With this fact in mind, although I have longed and planned for children my whole life, I always contended that if elective hysterectomies were possible I would seriously consider chucking my childbearing future out of the window. I am astounded at the PMS symptoms I can exhibit: in particular, if I am ill during my period, with the flu, say, I will have recurring flu symptoms for months afterward, but only during PMS. My body assumes an entire new set of problems all of its own, physically speaking. I have not even begun about the mental symptoms I feel.

I have contemplated invasive surgical solutions to this problem for the last fifteen years of my life: when my first period lasted for three weeks, when it would appear after only fifteen days between, when I took so much aspirin to rid myself of the stellar migraine I'd suffered for twenty hours straight that I thinned my blood to the point of almost passing out, when I first vomited from the pain of cramps, and many more times since.

Now I find out not only can I avoid this but with a pill I am already taking, are you kidding me? I start periodless TODAY. And to think of all of the women who have endured so much more that will read this letter and say, "You haven't seen nothin', child."

June 2001


"Give it to the men . . . take it away!" writes a pagan:

I am 24, and I am "pagan" (as in non-monotheist) so I am supposed to be grateful for my "moon time."

How?

It will probably (80 percent chance) kill me if I try to have children. I have HORRID cramps, gain weight, and tend to sleep 16 hours a day while menstruating. I also have fibromyalgia, which is worsened every month by this.

When I was 15, my O.B.-nurse mother made me get a Norplant. those six little tubes in my arm, and I didn't have a period for over a year. I was ecstatic! Then it came back, and I still wonder what kind of joke this is. Women go through more pain every month than most men will do throughout the course of their lives. We suffer through bloating, cramps, insecurity, PMS (which I thankfully do NOT suffer), and the knowledge that half of the population just thinks we are hysterical. and for what? Nine months of growing bigger, two days of labor, so that someone else can say "Look at my beautiful baby!"

I am not trying to male bash, truly I am not, and maybe I am just bitter because I CAN'T have kids, but dear Lord!!! I am truly tired of the male doctors who tell me it's all in my head.

So, give it to men, share the pain, but take it away!

June 2001


"NO" from a Portuguese 16-year-old who contributed several expressions to the "words for menstruation" page:

I'm 16 and my answer is NO without any doubt. I love my period - it makes me feel really like a woman. Average age for menarche in my country is 11 to 13. In fact, I almost began at 11 but emotional problems changed the age of my menarche.

I felt horrible when almost all my friends got their and I didn't. Finally it came two days after my 14th birthday (the day my friends came over to celebrate my birthday) but I hadn't the guts to tell them: it was something quite mine to share with them at that time. I told my mom, and she felt really happy.

After that, I knew my life would change. I felt more like a woman and love everything related to menstruation. My periods are not heavy, I have no cramps (I had cramps only one single time, went to sleep, felt better after that) and only 4 days of flow; but my cycle isn't very regular (35-45 days, at least).

I don't want to stop menstruating. Have no specific reason. Only I like it. It is something natural to being a woman and makes me remember (Thank the Lord) I'm not pregnant. For you women who don't like menstruation: buy yourselves a present in those days, wear a beautiful dress and feel how it's wonderful to be a woman.

June 2001


From a man - I think the first on this page - with a menstruating wife:

Naturally this isn't my question. The question for me to answer is, "Would you like for your wife to stop menstruating if she could?"

Yes. As long as she could still have children.

She is a heavy bleeder. It comes in huge gushes that overflow those enormous "hospital" size pads. Usually all she can get readily are the "heavy overnight" size and they are not much better than nothing. All her underwear is ruined. Enough bleach to get them clean burns the cotton up.

She bleeds for 7 days. She hurts. She has done this since she became regular (more or less) as a young teenager.

Her mood during this ordeal every month (except when we - yes, we - get nine months of relief) is putrid. She tries, since she knows why she behaves like that, but still she is aggravating to live with for the week. And she's exhausted afterwards.

Plus, with my being such an a.....e [meaning "anus"] (it comes naturally), meaning unemotional, I irritate her especially during her period. I do try to empathize, but somehow it doesn't come across.

Then, after her period is over, in another week comes her ovulation pains and cramps. More crummy attitude.

Hardly any other mammals do this. They all reabsorb the uterine lining if they don't get pregnant that time. Of course all the females go nuts every estrus cycle, along with the poor males who are jerked around by the females' pheromones. There's no happier cat than one who had his balls nipped at 6 months old. No screaming. No shredded ears. No running off every spring. Live to be 20.

Even though we want more children, I don't want them too close together. Supposedly women are best off having a baby every two-and-a-half years on average (according to World Health Org), and not closer than about 20 months. Plus, I don't want her worn out by too frequent childbearing; it was too hard for me to get this wife. I don't think I'd try for another if she expired. That's not the only reason; I want to keep her.

Breastfeeding helps delay the onset of menstruation, but our children wean themselves before they're a year old.

This menstruation thing - I can tell why women have called it "the curse." It sure is.

June 2001


No:

I started menstruating when I was eleven, and so its always seemed normal to me. But my last period was around Christmas time, and I know I'm not pregnant. I did stop taking the Pill a month before that though. It's very strange to suddenly not have my monthly companion.

No, I wouldn't stop menstruating, simply because it lets me know everything's functioning properly down there. And it reminds me that I'm a woman, and beautiful because of it.

June 2001


Yes!

I am an 18-year-old bi-sexual female from Melbourne, Australia and I say that I'd definitely give up my period if I could. Permanently even, because I've NO intention of having children, never have and never will. People have always said, "You'll change your mind when your older . . . ," but now I am well over the mark that they thought I'd change my mind, and I still don't want kids. I love kids, they love me, but I would never want them for myself, because I want to be a career woman, no time for kids. So, even though I have almost perfect periods (in comparison to some of you poor women out there!!), I'd still get rid of this rather expensive, irritating and completely obsolete part of my month. I only occasionally get cramps, and I have naturally oily skin which gets worse on my period, so I have nothing major to complain about, but if women don't want their periods, we should have the chance to get rid of it, without any health side effects!

While we're on this subject, I often "stop" my period with my Pill, which I've been on for quite a while now. What is the actual side effects of this action? I feel that I should know before continuing, because I am actually a very healthy person and don't like abusing my body needlessly.

Anyway, sorry for the long email. But I love that this forum is in existence, because this is something I think on quite a bit. (By the way, I admire all the women out there who really LIKE their periods. To me it's not necessary, but if you like it, that's great!!)

Please e-mail me with comments on this email (good or bad): asatru@bigpond.net.au

Thanks for this opportunity!!

June 2001


From "Cursed in North Carolina [U.S.A.]":

I'm not sure.

I'm twenty years old, had my first period at twelve, and everything was fine for three years.

Then it started. PMS, headaches, extremely heavy flow, gut-wrenching cramps, diarrhea ... I'm out of commission for one or two days each month. I can't get my friends (men!) to take me to buy tampons. Sometimes I end up pacing the floor, sweating and crying because it hurts so much. The only way to make it stop is to take enough pain medication to put me to sleep.

I can't take the Pill because it sends me into severe depression. I feel guilty taking codeine or four Aleve at a time, but what else am I supposed to do? Professors aren't exactly impressed when you explain that you missed that quiz because of cramps. My male friends are always too embarrassed to be sympathetic. (Pigs.) Even worse, I've started getting cramps between periods.

I like knowing that my body is on a regular cycle, and I'm afraid to mess with my hormones. I even like being able to take time for myself (after the drugs have kicked in, and I'm too woozy to do anything else). I definitely want children some day, and I don't really mind the mess -- it's fairly manageable. But when I balance feeling natural and feminine with iron deficiency and pain, it's just not worth it.

May 2001

Happy to have stopped:

I elected to stop menstruating in 1976. I figured that if I had the number of children that I wanted, there was no real need to continue menstruating.

I had a hysterectomy, and figured out that I saved myself about 7 years of menstruating over the years. I have never regretted my decision, and see no need for continued menstruating if you do not plan to conceive again.

PS: I did decide to increase my family size in my late 40s and adopted two great older kids from Russia. I had no desire to go back to diapers and bottles, and found the perfect solution to be adopting. My children are now 31, 26, 13, and 12.

May 2001


A 38-year-old woman writes, "Dear God, . .

. . . yes! If I could afford it, I would have the entire shootin' match removed: uterus, ovaries, everything! I have no need for it. It's just a big pain in the butt! Not to mention having to worry about the various cancers associated with those offending organs. I have had my family and do not ever want any more children, ever, by any man! I hate every minute of my period. It has cramped (no pun intended!) my style since I was 12 years old. I keep waiting for doctors to offer uterine transplants; I will be first in line to donate mine!

May 2001


Longing for menopause:

I grew up in a household with a father who absolutely freaked if he saw red tissue in the waste basket, let alone a used tampon - I'm a 40 year old American, and he was 40 when I was born - so my attitude toward menstruation is a bit warped. Add to that the fact that my periods are pretty screwy when left to their own devices, and my feelings about it are even more convoluted. I induce menstruation with DepoProvera whenever I start spotting, about once every two to four months. Otherwise I spot interminably (the record for me is about 21 months). When I used the DepoProvera monthly, I became anemic, (the flow is very heavy for 10 days or more, every time) and after 5 months my gynecologist said that I should use it less frequently.

I try to let my body tell me when it's time, and I take iron as well. So far the anemia's under control. I get some cramping, but not bad, and the mood swings are incredible for two or three days, but I can deal with that.

What I have trouble dealing with is my embarrassment about the mess. Starting with my dad (and mom, who, of course, put up with his disgust a lot longer than I ever did) I've run into far more repulsion than acceptance, especially from men. There are women in my life who "flow with the Moon," and love it - and a part of me agrees. It IS beautiful being a woman, with ALL that entails. Unfortunately, even in those circles I feel left out, since there's very little natural about my cycle. I bleed hard, pass clots the size of a chicken's egg, and for at least 2 or 3 days each time, I'm housebound, since I bleed through even a super plus tampon and heavy pad in 20 minutes or less. There's a reason that I was anemic, even while taking iron. I cope by putting a waterproof mattress pad on the bed, and just bleed as my body wants to. I have "moon linen," the stained relics of past periods, that I use for the purpose. Basically, I turn my apartment into a one-woman menstrual hut. I'm incredibly lucky to not work outside my home, or I don't know what I'd do! Even so, I hate answering the door to even the postal carrier during that time, since it looks like I've been slaughtering cattle on my bed (I live in a studio apt, and the whole room's visible from the door) and there's the bother of clothing which will then need to be soaked for my next trip to the laundromat.

So I think I can say truthfully - if I could be left alone for 2 weeks every three months, and have my laundry done for me afterwards, I wouldn't mind menstruating at all. But life being as it is, I'm longing for menopause.

May 2001

A 42-year-old woman in Switzerland says,

Oh, yes, I would! No doubt about that, simply because it makes me anemic.

May 2001


No:

A couple of weeks ago it would have been "yes," but I saw a TV show the other night about female athletes and how they go sometimes years with out their periods, and they were talking about how the lack of a menstrual cycle affects the bone density in women. Women who go 10 years or more without their periods suffer tremendous loss of bone density. One woman went eight years without it and had the bone density of a 70-year-old woman. I was shocked to say the least. So NO, I'll wait till menopause and then trade in my "Flying Bravo" [see expressions for menstruation; this writer contributed the Coast Guard phrase] time for my "Power Surges"!!!!!

May 2001

Yes and No:

Menstruating makes me feel like more of a woman. I just wish that I could plan when I'd be on my period; that way I wouldn't plan any beach trips or any parties. I started my period when I was 10 years old, I was in the 5th grade, and from the very beginning my periods were heavy, painful and long. My period would last anywhere from 11 to the longest being 14 days. They have shortened to 7 days and are a lot less painful now that I have been using birth control pills - thank God for that.

My one wish is that we wouldn't have to start our periods until the age of 15 or 16 and that we would be able to take something for the pain, for the length and for the flow right when it started.

May 2001

NO:

It disturbs me that so many women "HATE" their periods. I was on the Pill for over 15 years, trying to "control" my body and since I have been off it for a year and a half I have never felt better or more connected to myself. Menstruating for me is more then just a factor of reproduction. It is part of my functioning. I am so aware of my monthly cycles and know exactly what is going to occur when in terms of symptoms of menstruation that I can prepare for it and deal with them when they come. I can feel my cycle which is very powerful, as opposed to when I was self-medicated on a 21-day cycle that was not in sync with my natural cycle. It was man-made and that is frightening. Yes, there are some consequences to my actions mostly in terms of having sex; my partner and I have to be more responsible so that we don't conceive but again that is for the best because it actually makes us think about our actions. Sex is not longer taken for granted and in some way it has more meaning.

The excerpts from the book "Is Menstruation Obsolete" were disturbing too. One in particular troubled me greatly and that was about the number of young girls in Brazil becoming pregnant as a result of sexual abuse. I think this is a poor argument and very misleading focusing on the wrong issue entirely. This is not a issue of menstruation but an issue of the inability of our society to protect our children. Stopping young girls' periods is not going to stop the abuse, it is just going to make them more accessible to the scum who are hurting them. They can abuse their children without any outward consequences.

Finally, I know that many women have horrible, painful periods and terrible PMS but I believe in many cases that this is from generations of hate and shame towards menstruation that has embedded itself on a cellular level in all women. When we deny something that needs to be acknowledged and accepted it screams louder and louder for our attention. As we continue to deny our natural cycle, which is as natural as the cycles of the moon and the seasons, it will try to get our attention by causing us pain and suffering. Once we acknowledge it and celebrate it, the screaming will cease.

I am not saying that I have totally accepted menstruation, but I am working towards this. It is a fascinating aspect of being female and I know that my life has gotten better since I have begun this work toward acceptance and understanding.

May 2001


She stopped for her health:

I just recently started taking monophasic birth control pills consecutively (skipping the placebo/menstrual week) to effectively stop my cycle all together. This is a result of having ended up in the hospital with severe anemia brought on my habitually heavy flow. To say that my life was in danger is putting it mildly. Oxygen deprivation to my internal organs caused my body to consider shutting down permanently. I've learned my lesson. I need to talk about what is happening to my body for my own and others' health. This e-mail is a start.

Thanks again.

May 2001


A 15-year-old from Russia writes,

I started my periods about two years ago and I've never faced any problems like cramps or headaches.. I mean my periods never bother me unless it's time to go the beach or something. In this case I'd willingly take a pill that would prevent menstruating but only if I don't have any health problems in the future.

May 2001


She just started but doesn't want to continue:

Yes, I'm only 13 and have had my period for about a year and a half. Although I don't usually get cramps or have very heavy periods I don't feel that there is a need to begin menstruating this early. If I could, I would stop it until I'm older, married and want to have children. Right now I think that it is unnecessary, a pain, and unneeded. I have other things to think about than my period.

Thanks.

May 2001


She loves DepoProvera, but not menstruating:

I am a 23-year-old from the United Kingdom, and although I had never had any "problems" with my periods they were still an inconvenience, I no longer have to put up with them as I have been on DepoProvera (contraceptive injections) for the last two years with no side affects. I think it's fantastic - I mean who honestly wants to bleed once a month if you don't have to. I'm no less of a woman just because I don't get cramps and premenstrual syndrome (PMS) (I never did anyway) and I save a fortune I'd otherwise be spending on tampons.

May 2001

She suggests why so many women suffer while menstruating:

Reading through these responses, I was struck by the number of women who reported very heavy, painful periods. I went through this for over 20 years, until at age 33 I was diagnosed with von Willebrands Disease.

To make a long story short, this is a rare form of hemophilia which may go undetected until adulthood. The most common symptoms in adult women are prolonged, heavy menstruation with clots and hemorrhage after childbirth. If you have very heavy menstruation, ask your doctor for a laboratory test for von Willebrands disease. Even if you can live with the menstrual problems, you should know if you have vWD in case you need surgery or are in an accident. I nearly bled to death after my daughter was born; if I'd known about the vWD earlier I could have received treatment and the hemorrhage could have been avoided. I'm also happy to report that my periods are much lighter and less painful since I started treatment.

Good Luck,

April 2001

Yes:

I am an American woman, 38 years old in a month.

I would stop menstruating with the use of medicine in a minute if there were no bad side effects. (Sometimes the cure is worse than the disease.) I have had times when I have bled for four months straight. I suffer form migraine, and the premenstrual syndrome just gets worse ever year. I HATE feeling like I could tear someone part with my bare hands every month. My boyfriend say that I'm not that bad, but I try to hide a lot of it and we don't live together so he doesn't see everything. I have a 12 year-old son and at 38 don't plan to have any more children.

So, yeah, I would stop. Sign me up!

April 2001

No:

No.

I wouldn't stop if I could because although I don't enjoy it and have heavy periods; I just see it as something that has to be put up with.

When I started my periods at 13, I remember panicking about the fact that I would have to go through it every month, and later on, I would vomit with the pain, culminating in fainting in a shop and being carted off to hospital in an ambulance. Taking mefanamic acid [an anti-inflammatory drug that reduce levels of prostaglandins] made it bearable, and having a child has meant that I don't have to take tablets any more.

I just feel menstruating is something natural that we as women have to go through, and now that the physical discomfort is bearable, it's not half as bad as it used to be, although I do get the odd migraine, which isn't much fun. I have always mistrusted the Pill, and never taken it; various physical problems in the past couple of years have meant it's not a good idea for me anyway, and I want to have more children, so I'd rather put up with the periods - at least they are reassuring that everything is (hopefully) working properly.

April 2001


From possibly an 18-year-old Spaniard:

It has been an emotional rollacoaster every month and does this make me less than what I can be or could be? There is so much to say that at times I can't put my finger on it, but "When in Rome . . . ." Is fat part of the package or the scary truth of depression?

April 2001

NO! implies this woman with a Hispanic last name:

THAT IS SICKENING. WHO WOULD EVER EVEN THINK ABOUT DOING SOMETHING OF THAT SORT. BE A WOMAN AND BLEED A LITTLE.

April 2001

Probably:

I think so. I'm a 33-year-old American woman with one child and the desire to have one (or two) more.

I started menstruating at age 13 and recall all too well the numerous times when I would be doubled over in excruciating pain. It was a blessing to be free of this monthly nuisance when I was pregnant with my son. I didn't miss the pain, the bloating, the mood swings or the migraines. Many times an inconveniently timed period has ruined my life - during my honeymoon, for example.

So if there was a way I could stop menstruating - but retain the ability to start up again easily for the sake of conception - I'd probably sign up, as long as no artificial drug-induced methods were required. All this just to propagate the species.

This is a tad off the subject, but it kills me that women are the ones that have to put up with this monthly pain, bother, and expense when we're only fertile for about 24 hours a month. Men, on the other hand, are fertile EVERY DAY OF THEIR LIVES. Why not more pain and inconvenience thrown their way? [Women have to go through immeasurably more than men do as far as their bodies are concerned. Just your MUM's opinion.]

But I digress. Thank you for this site. Women's bodies are so amazing! I have learned things my mother never bothered to tell me. Maybe she would benefit from this site as well!? [Send her to her MUM!]

April 2001


No!

Never.

I love it.

I am dreading menopause and I'm only 23.

My favorite is the way it slides like fish paint into the toilet, a little drippy poem I made without trying. I am a woman.

April 2001


"I'm not sure":

I read the comments of the other women in your site and I have to say that I did agree with almost all of them in one aspect or the other. A while ago I would do anything to stop bleeding every month. Now I'm not sure. I started menstruating when I was 11 and had very heavy and painful periods. Today their intensity and pain depends more on the stress in my life than anything. If I'm exercising, eating well, feeling well and taking calcium supplies then I have a very comfortable cycle. But this is an ideal situation and I cannot always keep up my "good regime."

Right now I'm going through a very hard period in my life. I'm trying to finish a Ph.D. thesis, having missed two previous deadlines, I'm unemployed, my husband has been unemployed since January, we are being evicted from our loft and his brother has terminal cancer.

Needless to say that I hardly find the emotional energy to discipline myself to exercising and to have a good diet (and this is when I need it the most, I know), therefore my periods have been a disaster, a big nightmare. Ten days before the bleeding I feel suicidal, my breasts get sore and I feel bloated, I get very angry and irritable, I get terrible migraines, my neck and my shoulders get stiff, my sleep is restless. When the period finally comes it brings pain and instead of relief I feel drained and depressed.

So, back to your question: right now I think I would like to stop my period and get back to it when things get better. But it would be only an emergency measure, just for the time being. On the other hand, my period is also a way of self-communicating that I need to do something to change the state of things, that I need to make myself a happier person; then the periods would be happy as well.

My name is [deleted]. I've lived with my American husband in New York since 1997. I was born in Brazil. I am finishing a Ph.D. in social and visual anthropology at [deleted] University, England.

April 2001


Yes, otherwise give us menstrual leave!

I am a twenty-two year old, urban, American college student and a bisexual woman. I would happily give up my period if I could. But, barring that, I think that it would be reasonable for women to be granted a week of paid sick leave every month for their periods. Not only would this help us deal with the psychological instability we experience at this time but also with the physical problems. [After World War II, many companies in Japan granted menstrual leave because of the shortage of material for pads, and unions negotiated its terms. Apparently a few Japanese companies still grant this leave,]

I know women who require large doses of muscle relaxants and anti-psychotics during menstruation. Should they have to go to work in that state? I think it is a major tribute to our strength that we can do any work a man can do and menstruate at the same time. Most of us don't even talk about it.

This plan of time off for menstruation might sound as if it condescends to women, but, quite frankly, our bodies are different, and we need to be responsive to the needs of our bodies. If people could be made to understand that this does not make us "lazy" or bad or stupid, then it would not be a problem. Also, rather than hiring four women who work the whole month, the bosses could hire five women to fill the same amount of work, thus economically creating more jobs.

The leave could be paid by a plan, or perhaps by the state. And you could give up your leave if you felt it wasn't necessary; I for instance, only get my period occasionally and it's not bad, so I could forgo my leave.

Maybe if women formed unions in our jobs, we could set up a makeshift plan for ourselves so that women with severe periods could take that time off without getting fired and losing large amounts of pay.

Also, if I have to have my period, I don't want to have to hide it. Many tampons contain asbestos and other gross things that make you bleed more, so that you will buy more tampons [an expert writes that this is not true]. And they raise your risk of toxic shock syndrome, which we all know since we read our little pamphlets that come in our tampon boxes.

Why hide it? Did you know that human women are the ONLY mammals on the entire planet who conceal the fact that we menstruate? [Animals also don't conceal defecation and urination.] Also, in certain tribal matriarchies in Africa, where women are more powerful, there is no word for PMS [premenstrual syndrome], and the women don't understand the concept because they don't GET PMS. Food for thought!

If anyone has any thoughts on this, agreeing or disagreeing, feel free to write to me with your thoughts at spiregrain@angelfire.com

. . . and thanks for asking! [I'm happy you wrote!]

April 2001

Yes, from a 23-year-old art student who takes the "continuous Pill":

Yes, definitely! I have a bicornuate uterus [a double uterus] and thyroid trouble and therefore very irregular and heavy periods, and when after three years on birth control my periods were occasionally still lasting two weeks and coming one week after that, I jumped on the chance to stay on the continuous pill.

I still get my period once every three months, but at last I can be in control of my body instead of its being in control of me. I have also gotten debilitating and chronic migraines since the onset of my period at age 12, but these, too, have become fewer and far more manageable by keeping my levels of progesterone and estrogen level through the continuous Pill.

I am a graduate student in art, and my uterus is now a positive subject of my artwork instead of a negative one.

April 2001


No, from Wesleyan College (U.S.A.):

In Gloria Steinem's piece "If Men Could Menstruate" [read it!] she writes, "What would happen, for instance, if suddenly, magically, men could menstruate and women could not? The answer is clear - menstruation would become an enviable, boast-worthy, masculine event: Men would brag about how long and how much. Boys would mark the onset of menses, that longed-for proof of manhood, with religious ritual and stag parties. Congress would fund a National Institute of Dysmenorrhea to help stamp out monthly discomforts. Military men, right-wing politicians, and religious fundamentalists would cite menstruation ("MEN-struation") as proof that only men could serve in the Army ("you have to give blood to take blood"), occupy political office, ("Can women be aggressive without that steadfast cycle governed by the planet Mars?"), be priests and ministers ("how could a women give her blood for our sins?"), or rabbis ("without the monthly loss of impurities, women remain unclean").

We see our periods as something to be ashamed of or nuisanced by because that is how our culture has trained us to think. If it is "a woman-thing" it should be devalued. If it were a man-thing, it would be wonderfully honored in our culture. Nature allows us to release the blood every month.

What is so wrong about this?

*****Studies show that when women are taught view their menstrual cycle in a positive light, PMS [premenstrual syndrome] symptoms are lessened/disappear and the POSITIVE feelings of heightened energy and increased happiness are incredibly noticeable.*****

Why are we allowing our patriarchal society to prevent us from feeling positive about our periods?! In societies where menarche is celebrated and honored, complaints about menstruation are virtually unheard of.

I guess women are going to allow society to convince them that menstruation is messy, painful, and annoying, but it saddens me because attitudes like this just make them more messy, more painful, and more annoying.

April 2001

Periods are a nuisance

Yes, I'd be glad to not menstruate. I have no cramps, I'm not irregular nor do I have the really heavy flow - it just seems to be a nuisance. I've had one child - 19 years ago! - and she is enough; I asked the doctors then if they could take my womb since I wasn't planning on using it again! Of course, they (the doctors, males) were like, "Oh, you'll change your mind." Never did.

Anyhow, I'm 39 now, and periods just never have been that much TROUBLE, just a nuisance.

April 2001


"I am glad to be approaching menopause," writes a 45-year-old American:

I thought about this for a few days and I realized that for me, the problem isn't my period, it's the way I live.

When I was a teenager, I liked getting my period. I felt energized and happy. When I was a stay-at-home mom, my period didn't bother me. Sex and intimacy were great bleeding or not, and if I was feeling funky I could take it easy and just have some down time.

Now I am an older woman with grown children and I go outside of home to work. I think I would be fine if I was working from home, but I don't want to do that anymore. Now that I'm living as a "man" does, I find it icky to have to deal with my period. Modern life assumes that like a man I will (barring illness) be fine with my workload, day in, day out, no variation. So as I want to live like this I am glad to be approaching menopause. Thanks for letting me contribute!

April 2001


I need to stop it

Hi, and thank you for putting up this topic :) I am going to try and find the book [Is Menstruation Obsolete?, above] you mention right now.

I'm severely bothered by menstruation.

I'm a computer programmer, I'm 31, do want to remain female although I've thought about getting rid of it all just to not have to worry about the periods and babies. It bothers me, and always has, so much, that there are those few days out of the month when I can't focus or function as well as the other 90 percent of the programmers at work (men). I can't even drive or read a book as well; we notice these things, and men notice them too. It's medieval, and in a day and age when feminists have made it so that we are required to keep up with the males every step of the way, every day of the month, this limits us in a manner that's physically, emotionally, and psychologically obvious. Is that perhaps why they say women make less money? Because they have fewer resources available for cognitive functioning at that time?

I've experimented with stopping the period from happening, a lot when I was much younger, and now during times when the stress is too much, or I just can't afford to be unable to function. I've found that sometimes I can do it by not eating and trying to put the body in a state where it doesn't have the resources to do that extra stuff. But the female body is a vicious machine and will tend to accomplish its intended abuse with excessive pain the next month if you do so.

It's also very depressing when in relationships with males to hear that a guy won't have sex with a girl because he doesn't want his silk sheets ruined with blood, or because it's unacceptable and shocking for him to see her blood on himself - as if we never have to worry about an extremely similar feeling when we wake up to find ourselves looking as though we've been stabbed, or rush to work in the morning forgetting to wear your diapers or sanitary devices on the day you've dutifully marked on the calendar and right in the middle of a meeting you feel it rush out onto your clothes. Then you're pretty much screwed. And then - you may have to edit this out if it isn't acceptable :) - there's being told that he would love it if I would orally pleasure him, but he can't reciprocate because he's a vegetarian (??? ridiculous, but it actually happened).

I hate it so much I very often can't deal with its ramifications on relationships with men; it has broken up many of those (well, my so-called "irrational" [not my word for it] response to it has, anyhow). I NEED intimacy at that time, because it's a HARD time to live, when you're just trying to be on top of your game, or at very least trying not to bust into tears at the littlest thing or ignore the cramps and acne and constipation and all that.

Sorry for the long email; this is not venting - this is simply a statement of how I view the period and all its inanity in the modern world. I so hope they will market a solution; I would volunteer my help in any way they can possibly use it.

Thank you :) [Thanks for contributing!]

April 2001


Yes, but only if she had no side effects

I am [name deleted] from The Netherlands. I am 33 years old and have had difficulties (cramps, heavy bleeding and changing moods) since the first time I ever had my period (at 14 years). After having 2 children (now 4 and 2 years old) I hoped my problems would get less, but on the contrary, they have gotten worse since the last few months. There was a period when I had no problems because I used the birth control Pill from the age of 15 until I reached the age of 26!!!

But now I am really thinking of using the Pill again, because I hate the periods (they last sometimes 11 days!!, give me cramps, heavy bleeding, changing moods, tiredness) and I would celebrate the day I got the message I would never had to bleed again. But I would have to be certain that I would not have any side effects and other extra health problems!!!

Success with research and this site! Thank you for reading my message. [Thanks for contributing!]

April 2001


Yes and no

I was looking forward to starting my period and becoming a woman. Well I was in for a surprise. Every month I plan around my period. I get terrible cramps, so bad I would sometimes throw up. I'd flow so heavily I'd go through a tampon and pad in an hour. Taking the pill has helped somewhat.

I would stop my period. I know it's something magical and special but I feel it's not benefiting me right now. I'd start them again when I'm ready to have children.

April 2001


Would she stop?

In a heartbeat!

March 2001


But a writer from Columbia University (New York City) exclaims,

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!!

While menstruation can be seen as inconvenient, and can sometimes ruin my clothing, I would never, ever choose to stop it forever. I like the way menstruation connects me to something great, to a cycle; I like living in a cyclical manner. I think menstruation is wonderful and powerful.

March 2001

Wait! A Canadian counters,

Absolutely!

It's an inconvenience and has wrecked some of my favorite clothes!

I'm 34, married 11 years with no children.

March 2001

She feels as if she's in drag:

I am 21, American, soon-to-graduate college student. I am a lesbian, have no desire to have children, and therefore no need to menstruate. I beg some scientist to stop my body from incessantly proclaiming my womanhood in the painful, expensive, unwarranted, and all too frequent way that it insists upon doing. I feel like I'm in drag when my body bleeds. I love my breasts and my genitals, but do I have to be equipped with reproductive organs???

March 2001

"Love to Menstruate"

I am 19 years old and in the word of a radical womyn from Glad Rags [which makes washable pads], I too "Love to Menstruate."

Looking at this time of the month as a celebration, something uniquely red and beautiful and womynly has totally changed my life, and I talk to all of my friends about it because I want them to know they can love their bodies as much as I do. Plus, your period is a reminder that you are not pregnant, something you might have more cause to worry about if you artificially stopped your period but were not perfect about taking your pills.

The pill industry has a lot of money behind it - if this flies then women will be buying 350 more hormone pills per year (in place of the 7 sugar-based pills once a month). The articles hailing this as women's lib of the future gloss over the fact that continuous use of the pill also increased side effects like weight gain and headaches.

Also, ending periods will represent a huge victory by the social mob trying to tell us that our blood is dirty. IT IS AWESOME - I wouldn't give it up for anything except having a baby.

March 2001

HELL YEAH! - maybe.

Well, I'm really not sure if I would or wouldn't. What are the major side affects?

Many years ago when I was on the Pill my body didn't like the hormonal shifts and I was miserable for months on end until I found the right one. But as an older woman who smokes, would it be the same as the Pill? [Probably the same or similar.] If you could say, SAFELY stop my period, HELL YEAH! But I am not ashamed or bothered now that I am in my later 30s (38 to be exact). I have found the Instead [menstrual] cup has taken all my problems away (besides the HORRIBLE nasty mood swings). I don't even plan or chart my life around it any more!

But I could happily live with out becoming "psycho-momma" Bitch from hell.

And becoming older and more health conscious really does help; most of our problems are because as Americans we eat total crap daily and don't take care of ourselves.

March 2001

"Most definitely yes":

At my 13th birthday party, I was the only one out of all my friends who had not started her period yet. I wasn't looking forward to it, either. When I started my period two weeks later, I was very disappointed. It smelled gross, it made a mess, and I had no control over it.

It is seven years later, and I still hate it.

I don't have horrible periods like some people say they do. I never had severe cramps, or PMS. I just hate the mess, the smell and the inconvenience of it. It almost seems like Murphy's law makes it way into you system too.

What else could spoil your Valentine's Day plans, make you wear your jacket around your waist in the rain and embarrass you anyway when your friend's dog won't get its nose out of your crouch.

I would love it if I could take control of my body and stop my period when I wanted to.

March 2001

Twenty-two-year-old Alfiya from Kyrgyzstan writes,

Well, my answer is NO. I wouldn't stop menstruating even if I could. Here are some reasons:

1. I don't feel any discomfort when my periods come. Now we have tampons and sponges which let us forget all troubles concerned with menstruation.

2. Maybe some women would laugh at this reason, but I think menstruation lets me feel myself like a REAL WOMAN. And I'm really proud of it!!! I see my magic influence on men. It's great!

3. Did you ever try to have sex in such days? This sensation is beyond dreams! I would never renounce it.

March 2001

She wants to keep her hormones, but you can have her . . .

I am 32 years old and I do not want and never have wanted children. I feel like menstruating is completely unnecessary for me. I would stop if I could provided it wasn't unhealthy for my body. If I could find a doctor who would take out my uterus and leave my ovaries, I would do it. I do want to keep my hormones because I need them, but I do not need to menstruate.

March 2001

A student from Syracuse University (in the state of New York) chimes in:

Of course I'd stop, partly because I don't want children (at any rate not biological children) and partly because of the expense. I am a student.

The amount I spend on tampons, pads, pantiliners, underwear, and laundry would pay for a nice dinner each month. Furthermore, I am sometimes anemic and would probably feel more chipper if I could hang on to more red blood cells.

March 2001

From a woman in England, 37 years old:

I began menstruating at the age of 12. I had been primed with books, but discussions regarding sex and periods were definitely taboo! It started with mild cramps; they were great for getting out of gym classes.

However, the symptoms became worse as I became older; now at 37 I want out. I suffer from mood swings, angry tearful outbursts, loose bowels, heavy bleeding and clots. I have extreme backache and stomach cramps; I feel nauseous and tired. My period lasts for five days and I am in discomfort for two of those days.

To top it all I am emetophobic [have a fear of vomiting] and this makes me extremely anxious. I do not want parts of my body removed and I am not allowed to take the Pill, as I have migraine headaches. I do not have children and do not want any, so the parts of my body are not going to be used.

I wish there was some other way to get rid of these monthly nuisances. I do not hate my body - I love my body - but I would like to be in control, just for once. If men had them would something have been done by now?

I have written a poem called the "Bleeding Womb" which I wrote in the height of my pain. I would like to share it.

THE BLEEDING WOMB

It's a girl! they shout - oh cries of joy
It's a girl! they shout - oh dear it's not a boy

And so it came to be, a life from twelve
racked with pain and misery

It's difficult to explain menstruation, periods, aunties visiting
It's nature, I hear cries of it's only natural

natural, my mother explains, God's way of showing
there is no blessing of children this month

but, instead, a punishment
with no alien parasitic being feeding off my body

how dare I say it, how dare I think it, write it
people, women, will think I am insane, unnatural, not a true woman.

I think and feel that they think I should be locked up in a mental asylum.

Selfish, how totally selfish, how does your husband feel?
but what about me, do I not exist
Oh I exist for the pain and misery bestowed on me each month

The volcanic eruption, parting from my body like red hot lava, falling down rocks
The gnawing raw agony, as I sit in a corner, angry, tired of pain, raw anger.

The way to the freedom from this is the "change,""the menopause"
change into what
a life free of periods, but with it other hurdles

Brittle bones, H.R.T., hot flushes
It is not penis envy
I do not want to be a man
Just a human being

Who isn't plagued every month with the "curse"
not to be at the mercy of drugs, the surgeon's knife, the regular visits to the doc'

Who are we women at the mercy of, the men who treat us,
the men who tease us, she cannot be trusted she has periods, have I grown two heads?

How many women identify with some if not all of this poem? Take care, fellow sufferers.

March 2001


A student from California writes:

I would have to say no. For some women, the end of menstruation would put an end to mood swings, sensitivity, horrible cramps and headaches. In this case, I can see why anyone would want to get rid of it! However, I have had bad cramps only a handful of times, and rarely experience large mood swings or other related symptoms. I see my period as an integral part of my body and I don't think I would feel right without it (despite the money I must spend on tampons). Another reason I would not get rid of my period is that it conveys information. Every month I get my period I am happy that I am not pregnant. And someday when I wish to be pregnant, I will be happy not to have it!

March 2001


"Stop menstruation? Definitely!"

I'm a 23-year-old rather unromantic woman who has NO desire to have children, and to top it off, as I see it, menstruation has done nothing for me but put me through hell.

I have had spells of anywhere from three months to two years without menstruation, and, for me, those were the best times of my life. I have irregular periods naturally, due to some pituitary-gland issues, and when I do have them, they pull me away from the things I want to do, and I don't get anything done. I have to tell people that I'll get to things they've asked me to do in a few days, when I had promised I'd get them done that day.

A few hours ago, I had to inform my choral director that I might not make it to tomorrow morning's practice. Anyone who knows me could tell you that's an extremely rare occurrence; I always make it to rehearsal. But I wasn't sure where I'd be come morning, if I'd be able to function effectively or not. So for me, to be able to stop menstruation altogether would be the best thing that could happen.

Of course the challenge is dealing with a world that thinks it's impossible to live without it. I avoid gynecologists, knowing they'll want to see me having regular periods. Of course when they put me on the Pill to try to accomplish this it was more hell than it was worth, and both times I gave up on that, the second time giving up immediately.

Unfortunately, nature decided to try its own hand at regulation as of October, but it's still little more than torture. If I can find a way out of it, rest assured I will!

March 2001


"Stop the madness," mails a woman:

Yes!

I am a 35-year-old mother of two teens! I have been sterilized and do not plan to have any more children. I would stop immediately if I knew it could happen without removing any of my existing organs or taking pills that would affect my endocrine system down the road. I don't believe that women should have to wait for menopause to take care of it. I can definitely think of other ways to celebrate my womanhood!

March 2001

A Christian woman writes about blood from herself and -

I just came across your site . . . well, actually a few hours ago. I have been looking it over and have found it fascinating! Something that stuck me, though, is the idea throughout the years of blood being "unclean" and even evil. It seems funny to me since as a Christian woman, I know that what has saved me is the blood of Jesus. His blood washed away all of our sin, yet we (especially the American culture) view blood as shameful. Crazy, isn't it?!

My periods are highly irregular; I go for months in between. Yet I am always happy to have it arrive. It makes me feel clean and pure. It is a preparation for my body to carry a child. My period after having my daughter was so strange to me. I looked at the blood and tissue that came out and was amazed at how all of that helped to create and sustain the life of my amazing baby girl. I discussed it with my husband and he thought that was pretty cool! I love an enlightened man!!

Recently, I switched to washable pads. I soak them after I use them and then use the water for my plants. My plants have never looked better! I thank God for my "period," even when it seems in the way.

Thank you for your site. It is so informative. The is no way I will be able to get through it tonight. I will bookmark it and come to it often!

March 2001


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