The artist,
Nikoline Calcaterra
Introduction
Presently, I am working as both a
multi-media artist and as the
Program
Coordinator at White Mountain
Academy of the Arts, in Elliot
Lake, Ontario.
Throughout my life, art has been
a source of comfort, insight and
beauty,
from literature to music to visual
art.
It brings tears to my eyes to
remember waking up in the middle
of the
night as a young girl, to the
sound of my mother's typewriter as
she vigorously
released her response from the day
past. This was the only spare time
she
could find, after her role as
mother and wife. Today, she has
fulfilled
her dream.
As an adult, I still get chills
when I hear Mozart and Bach. It
reminds
me of our old upright piano and
takes me back to a time when
things were
straightforward, to a time when
all of life's questions were
answered by
a simple emotional response. If
reading "Anne of Green Gables"
or listening to Mozart made me
cry, I did not question why, I
simply accepted
the sadness as my response to the
art.
This concept of the emotional
response has become my main
inspiration
behind my present body of work.
The work is an emotional response
to both
my conscious and subconscious
observations as a lesbian woman.
Although
my work is supported by research,
the root of my observation is
gathered
following the works creation. Some
believe that this method is
backwards
in its execution, but I believe
that by working from the emotional
response,
I am maintaining the purity of the
thought, with few outside
influences.
Artist's
Statement
My inspiration stems from being
woman and needing to release my
emotional
response to all that I observe in
this form and on this Earthwalk.
I fail to understand this worlds
inability to see things for what
they
are. Therefore, I feel the need to
create discussions that often go
unexpressed.
Woman bleeds. Blood is life. Life
is beyond control.
I am inspired by life, and the
emotions involved in holding the
position
of woman. I am inspired by love
and the emotions invested in
loving another
called "woman." I am inspired by
women and the emotions generated
when circles are formed. I am
inspired by the Great Mother and
the emotions
surrounding her creation and
destruction.
The work I create reflects
emotions involving gender identity
related
to woman and her journey, from
birth to her passage through the
veil, and
beyond.
"Creation
Circuit"
I entered into a discussion with
a friend about the possibility of
having
a child with my current partner. I
mentioned that we were considering
a
few options, including finding a
suitable sperm donor. She looked
at me
with confusion and said, "Why do
you need a sperm donor? Why can't
the two of you have a baby?" I
gave her a minute to process what
she
had just said, and then the light
came on. "Oh my Goddess! I had
never
thought about the fact that you
are both women!" This conversation
inspired me to make Creation
Circuit.
Creation Circuit is a
three piece steal gate that
attaches to
a tall blood red picket fence. The
two outer gate pieces, each 5.5' x
2.5',
are bent into the vague
silhouettes of women facing into
each other. The
centre gate piece that acts as the
door is a 4.75' x 2.5' rounded
rectangle.
The centre of each piece contains
a series of brushed steel circular
vines
that indicate a spiral growth
pattern, moving in and out of each
piece.
In the centre of the door piece is
a stone that appears to be the
source
of the surrounding growth. In all
three pieces there is a series of
1/2"
round bar painted blood red that
on either end piece, joins up to
an oval
stone. When all three gate pieces
are lined up, the spiral growth,
the red
round bar and the stones inside
the gate frame become a large
image of what
I imagine procreation by two
females would look like. The red
round bar
forms the vagina, cervix and
uterus in the door piece, and the
fallopian
tubes in the two outside pieces.
The oval stones in the two outside
pieces
are the ovaries, and the stone in
the door piece is the egg having
been
fertilized and is beginning its
growth. I have always pictured the
chemistry
of the first moments of a
fertilized egg to be like
fireworks, an explosion
of hormones and DNA.
Although it is fully functional
outside, it is meant to be
installed
in a gallery so that the red
picket fence follows along the
walls of the
entire gallery space and the gate
is the means of entrance into the
exhibition
space.
Creation Circuit is about
menstruation, procreation,
sexuality,
life, etc., and is meant to look
at why our society finds it so
hard to
accept that those who bleed and
give life, can also love and
nurture and
provide for that life together.
"Padded" -
(Images 1 to 4)
"Padded" was inspired, in part by
my recent introduction to
homemade, terry cloth menstrual
nappies, and in part by Gloria
Steinem's
essay entitled, If Men Could
Menstruate.
"Padded" was created by covering
a XL fleece vest with clean,
fresh, whiter-than-white menstrual
pads in a pattern that mimicked a
quilted
down ski vest sized to fit a large
male. The tampons were added as
decoration,
loosely referring to the North
American native cultures that
would honour
woman during her moon-time by
isolating her in a menstrual hut
where she
could be with her powerful energy.
The inside lining of the vest is
made of red broadcloth, which
represents
the blood being contained inside
the body instead of being aloud to
run
out from the body. It also refers
to the disconnection women have
with their
blood now that disposable
menstrual products have replaced
the reusable,
re-washable pad. Women no longer
have to look, touch or smell their
power.
They simple contain, dispose and
ignore the gift that separates and
honours
them as women.
The vest hangs in a steel cage,
70 x 70 x 90 cm, much like a bird
cage
only bottomless. This refers to
women as beings caged by
patriarchy for
their "bloody inconvenience", but
continue to repress themselves
by refusing to escape from the
cage walls. Tampons, although
dangerous and
unnatural, are very convenient and
allow women to ignore their
moon-time
and move forward in the
male-dominated work world,
becoming much like man,
obsessed with time, money and
convenience. The result is a new
generation
of woman who are disconnected from
the rituals of blood that define
them
as strong, powerful, givers of
life, who instead view blood as a
dirty curse
that causes discomfort and
inconvenience each month,
beginning at puberty
and ending with menopause.
The vest is fitted for a large
male frame, and is meant to be
worn by
a model as a format for
exhibition. This is a commentary
on Gloria Steinem's
essay, If Men Could Menstruate:
...the characteristics of the
powerful, whatever they may be,
are thought to be better than
the characteristics of the
powerless - and logic has
nothing to do with it. What
would happen, for instance, if
suddenly, magically, men could
menstruate and women could not?
The answer is clear -
menstruation would become an
enviable, boast-worthy,
masculine event. [Read the whole
essay
here.]
It is with the above in mind,
that I challenge the male ego to
step up
and wear this vest in honour of
all the women in their lives who
have had
to face the stigma of being the
gender that bleeds and therefore
gives life
to this world.
Menses:
Maiden, Mother, Crone
Series
(images 5 - 8)
The Menses series was
inspired mainly by a birthing
retreat I
attended with my partner and seven
other women, two of whom were
lesbians,
four sexual abuse victims, four
retired nurses, two healing
artists, two
visual artists and five Crones.
Among many other incredible
discussions
that went on during this weekend,
was one regarding the story of our
first
menses. What came out of this
recollection, this deep soul
searching, was
a flush of emotion; laughter,
tears, anger, hysteria,
embarrassment, . .
. laughter, and what we began to
realize, was how little attention
we had
aloud to this moment, how little
attention the world allows to this
moment.
For the women, the experience of
our first menses was not too far
gone,
but for the Crones, this memory
was stored, and in most cases
hidden behind
40 or 50 years of memories. We
discussed blood, mothers, cramps,
fathers,
secrets, embarrassing moments,
misunderstandings, tampons, terry
cloth nappies
and menstrual pad belts!
Throughout the weekend, we as
women honoured each
stage of the female life, from
Maiden to Woman to Crone, and
aloud each
moment the attention that it
deserved. From this experience
comes the Menses
series.
Menses: Maiden, Mother, Crone
all begin with the same imprinted
background of blood red disposable
pads and the same foreground image
of
an entanglement of tubes in the
top right hand corner, with a
detail of
those same tubes spanning the
length of the paper. These tubes
represent
the inner workings of the female
body during so many moments in our
lives,
from the umbilical cord to the
birth canal to the fallopian
tubes.
Menses: Maiden has white
Japanese rice paper
chinchölé
on the right third of the image.
This is to symbolize the portion
of purity
a Maiden still holds prior to her
first menses. On the bottom centre
of
the image, the famous "Tampax
Insertion Instructions" have been
transferred onto the same white
rice paper. This image describes
the anxiety
and confusion that so many Maidens
go through prior to bleeding.
"They
want me to stick what into
where?!" In the top left hand
corner, there
is the same white rice paper cut
into the shape of a pad with the
following
words written by Eve Ensler:
"Second grade, seven years old,
my brother was talking about
periods. I didn't like the way
he was laughing. I went to my
mother. 'What's a period?' I
said. 'It's punctuation,' she
said. 'You put it at the end of
a sentence.' My father brought
me a card: 'To my little girl
who isn't so little anymore.' I
was terrified. My mother showed
me the thick sanitary napkins. I
was to bring the used ones to
the can under the sink. I
remember being one fo the last.
I was thirteen. We all wanted it
to come. I was afraid. I started
putting the used pads in brown
paper bags in the dark storage
places under the roof."
-The Vagina Monologues
On the far left hand side of the
image, on the edge of the white
chinchölé,
is a pink ribbon that is laced to
the paper with pink embroidery
floss in
the style that corsets were laced.
In many rituals, ribbons are given
to
women as a way to mark certain
moments in their lives. Pink
represents the
Maiden and the lacing describes
the repression young Maidens
experience
by being kept silent about one of
the most precious moments of their
lives
Menses: Mother has red
hand-watercoloured Japanese rice
paper
chinchölé on the right
third of the image. This
represents the
blood of a Woman. The blood of the
menses, the blood of the broken
hymen
and the blood spilled during
childbirth. On the bottom centre
of the image
is a transfer on the same red
watercoloured rice paper, of a
Maltese statue
symbolizing the birthing process.
Her vulva is swollen and open and
her
legs are held high and wide. On
her back are nine lines that
represent the
nine months of carrying the child
in her womb. On the top left hand
corner
of the image is a disposable
menstrual pad with the following
words written
by Jamie Sams:
"The Thirteen Original Clan
Mothers decided to forge the
bonds of sisterhood that would
unite all women as one. This
Sisterhood was based on a bond
of blood that marked the cycles
of fertility in women. These
cycles of fertility are based on
moon cycles of twenty-eight days
between bleeding. To this day,
women who live, dream, or pray
together will have their
Moontimes or menstrual cycles at
the same time so that their
wombs are open simultaneously,
allowing the dreams of humankind
to be planted inside and then
nurtured as a group."
-The Thirteen Original Clan
Mothers
On the far left hand side of the
image, on the edge of the red
watercoloured
rice paper, is a red ribbon laced
on to the paper with red
embroidery floss
in the style that corsets were
laced. In many rituals, women are
given red
ribbons when they begin their
menses. The lacing represents the
repression
and embarrassment that women are
made to feel about their moontimes
and
all that is involved with this
process.
Menses: Crone has cream
coloured Japanese rice paper
chinchölé
on the right third of the image.
This represents the memory of
blood, the
shadow. On the bottom centre of
the image is a transfer on the
same cream
coloured rice paper of sage
bundles. Sage is thought to hold
the power of
immortality, longevity and wisdom,
much like a crone. On the top
right corner
is the shadow of a menstrual pad
with the following words written
by Kelly
Rose Mason:
"She whispers "Remember", and
the blood song of my ancestors
stirs in my heart as I awaken
to myself.
Remember, as my granddaughter,
how I took your slender hand
and led you to the soft moss to
bleed upon for the first time?
Remember, as lovers, how we
danced and celebrated the
secrets of
our womb, our hair and hips and
skirts whirling to the beat
of the Mother Drum?
Remember, as my daughter, how
you sat at my feet and honored
my
wisdom as I do for you now?"
On the far left hand side of the
image, on the edge of the cream
coloured
rice paper, is a purple ribbon
laced on to the paper with purple
embroidery
floss in the style that corsets
were laced. In many rituals, women
are given
purple ribbons when they stop
flowing. It is a way to honour the
Crone for
her wisdom and knowledge. This
lacing represents the repression
and embarrassment
that Crones are made to feel about
aging and losing their ability to
create
life.
The Menses series is in
response to the ongoing battle
women face
because they do in fact bleed.
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